TheGiver8 Posted August 3, 2014 Posted August 3, 2014 Hello Fellow LoveShackers...I Was Wondering If You Could Give Me Some Insight..Or Possibly Even Some Advice!!! Here Is My Story...Take Out Your Reading Glasses Because This Ones A Long One lol Ok, So I Am A 28 (turning 29 in September) Female Whom Is Currently Living With My 29 Year Old Boyfriend Of Five Years...Five Hectic Five Years!!! We Met Online And Well He Seemed Genuinely Into Me As A Man. After Talking For 3 Months We Decided To Finally Meet Up. It Just So Happened To Be On My 24th Birthday So He Took Me On A Romantic Date To An Expensive Restaurant. I Felt Well That He Could Afford It Considering He Had Told Me He Had Everything Under Control And He Had Pleny Of Money That I Had Nothing To Worry About. So I Believed Him. He Lived With His Parents And They Were Renting Out A Studio Apartment That They Had Built In The Back Yard A Couple Years Ago. After About All!pat a Years Of Dating He Asked Me To Move Into The Studio Apartment With Him Because I Was At The Moment Living With My Aunt Sleeping On Her Couch. By Then I Had Already Met His Family, Awkwardly Because His Brothers Never Came Out To Introduce Themselves Which I Found To Be Rather Rude. I Was Trying To Find Work When He Asked Me To Move In With Him But He Insisted That He Wanted Me To Move In And That He Would Take Care Of Me. At First I Loved The Idea Because Well All Of My Life I Had Always Been The One To Take Care Of Others And Thought Wow, This Is Going To Be Wonderful!!! So I Moved In With Him Into The Back Studio Trusting In Him To Take Care Of Me. We Literally Slept On A Single Mattress And A Blow Up Mattress Side By Side In The Winter Freezing Our Arses Off Because The Windows Are So Thing And We Had No Heater, We Used The Oven As A Heater. It Was Pretty Bad But I Believed In Him. Now I'm A Very Social Person And Love Being Around People Making People Smile, So After A Month I Started To Feel As Though Maybe It Would Be A Good Idea If I Started To Work! He Hated The Idea!!! I Hated That He Hated The Idea Because We Are Supposed To Be Partners. So I Started To Feel Depressed Because it Was Still A New Relationship So I Wanted To Respect His Wishes but I Knew We Needed It. So Literally Three Months After I Moved In His Family Started To Lose Their House To Foreclosure And That Made Me Feel Even Worse Because Although I Knew It Wasn't My Fault I Felt As Though I Could Have Helped Prevent It. (Even Though Now I Know I Couldn't Have Because It Takes A While For A House To Get On Foreclosure So His Family Had Been Doomed For A Long Time Before I Was Even In The Picture.) The Same Month He Had Found Out They Were Losing Their House He Got Injured On The Job And Ended Up Leaving Because His Injury Was Really Bad. Now Thats When Things Got Rough!!! His Parents WeremLosing Their House He Has An Older Brother (now 37) living at home and a younger Brother (now 27) Still Living At Home As Well. His Older Brother Is A Dentist Assistant And His Younger Brother Is Going To School. None Of His Parents Work. So It Was Rather Difficult And Stressful Because I Really Felt That I Needed To Work Now, It Was A Necessity Now No Questions Asked!!! But Him Being Stubborn And Unreasonable Said That It Would Be Better If I Had Just Left. Which Hurt Me Even More Because I Just Couldn't Understand How He Could Just Let Me Go Like That. Instead Of Letting Me Help. So I Told Him I Want Going to To Leave Him That I Was Going To Be Strong And Stick By His Side And Be His Lady Like He asked Of Me When He Asked Me To Be His Girlfriend. So I Was. There Were Days I Didn't Eat. I Was Sad Because There Was No Money For Gas To See My Family. It Was Difficult Because I Had Never Gone Through Anything Like This Because My Family Is Well Off. But I Did It Assuming It Was Showing My Devotion And Strength To Him. Now He Only Has His GED and Only Had One Job Experience (a bad one at that because he was suing them, and he left) So We Were Here Dealing With His Families Hardships and It Was Just Not An Ideal Beginning For The Both Of Us. So Because He Was Injured I Didn't Want to be too Hard On Him To Look For A Job, But To Help Motivate Him. My Dad Has Been Working at His Job For 30 Years And I Figured Well, He Drives All Day, Makes A Great Amount Of Money Maybe He Could Get Him In. So My Dad Tried But Of course My Bf Had To Try As Well And Takes Tests. There Was A Little Problem Which Was Distance. it Was About An Hour Away, Possibly Two In Traffics To Go And Come Back. So that Was An Issue That His Parents Didn't Like So Because Of That His Dad Sabotaged His Opportunity Because He "took a look at the car" and it just so happen to mess up the day of his test!!! Which I knew he did intentionally because the car had been running fine the day before. And That Really Made Me Mad Because This Was A Huge Opportunity For The Both Of Us As A Couple And I Tried. But It Upset Me So Much Because My Father Put His Name On The Line For Him And I Hate Letting My FathernDown. So That Happens, By This Time Its Three Years Into The relationship And well I get Tired Of Waiting And All The Stress With The House Continuing I Started To Push Him. And Tell Him That He Needs To Start Putting Out Resumes and Cover Letters And Stop Playing On His Damn PlayStation 3. Which Was Another Stress Of Mine. I Felt That As Long As That System Was Running He Wasn't Focused On What Was Important!! So One Night I Prayed!!! I Prayed So Hard For That System To Break So We Can Move Forward With Our Lives!!! And As God As My Witness, IT WORKED!!!! it just wouldn't turn on. He Took It Apart And Tried To Fix It And Nothing!!! I even felt so bad that he needed a little piece to fix it and I gave him my Bobby pin lol. Bit it didn't work and he finally started to look for a job!!! Now he did his resume and cover letter and for 6 months got NO RESPONSES AT ALL!!! So o told him, let me help you, help us!!! Let me do your resume and cover letter so that way you can get a call back!!! And we can move forward!!! So I did and as soon as I did he got a call back, a dozen actually but the one he really wanted to get was one that was only 10 minutes away and started off at 11.50 an hour. So since his car hadn't been working and his older brother had been on vacation because his dentist was moving his office to a different location we figured when he got the call to go in for an interview that it would be a breeze!!! Until, the dentist called the night before my boyfriends interview and said he needed his bother to go in in the morning, so the first thing my boyfriend does is asks his brother if he could have his dad take him to work so he could use the truck to go to the interview. And his brother says, its not my problem you find a way to get there!!! So that really ticked me off and them what really ticked me off was the fact that his parents didn't care either!!! After four years of their son not working how could you not care????? So after seeing that and seeing how sad and depressed my boyfriend got it killed me so much to see him on the verge of tears!!! So Its midnight and I go igamingthier house and I yell at them and tell them what are they thinking??? As parents they should find a solution to getting their son to this interview!!! So they just act so nonchalant and are like well if he wants it he should find a way!!! And this irritated me so much and I started to ask them if they could call a guy they had previously said months ahead was selling his car and ask him if my bf could borrow it for a week or two and when he gets paid he will pay him. So they get amused call the guy get the car at 2 in the morning and my bf is able to go to the interview, once again because of me!!! So I make some flash cards and ask him interview questions before his interview so he could be prepared. He gets the job!!! And the first thing I tell him is to get his car so that way I could start working too and get a job of my own!!! And he says OK OK OK...I will...well its almost a year that he's been working and well no car!!! Here I am at home for almost a year getting depressed again!!! And he has no car!!! So after about three months I tell him OK..no car at least get me a dog so I can feel as though I have company!!! Well..its almost a year and no dog!!! So I get depressed and my family says I need to get away for a while and he doesn't like that. So They Invite me to a family weekend in Vegas, he didn't like that!!! Not one bit!! But I was already getting frustrated because he had promised me either he would have his car by now or a dog for me...he had even gone far to say that he wanted his ps4 but was going to get me my dog first dozens of times!!! Well, as soon as I leave for vacation he sees the opportunity to get himself his $600 dollar system!!! Which irritated the hell out of me because he knows I'm falling into depression all over again!!! And he knows how it feels because he went through it as well until I pushed him to get a job!!! We are practically 30 and he's still so obsessed with his dumb gaming. I feel as though I'm not even his first priority the way I use to be, he doesn't want to make me happy although I do everything a f should do and I've done everything and anything he's ever asked not me!!! I cook for him I clean for him I lay out his clothes for him, yet he comes home and straight to his system he goes!!! I just don't know what to do anymore!!! I feel as though he needs to grow the hell up and set his priorities straight!!! Someone please help me understand, am I wrong for wanting more?!? Or for feeling as though I deserve more???
Author TheGiver8 Posted August 3, 2014 Author Posted August 3, 2014 Hello Fellow LoveShackers...I Was Wondering If You Could Give Me Some Insight..Or Possibly Even Some Advice!!! Here Is My Story...Take Out Your Reading Glasses Because This Ones A Long One lol Ok, So I Am A 28 (turning 29 in September) Female Whom Is Currently Living With My 29 Year Old Boyfriend Of Five Years...Five Hectic Five Years!!! We Met Online And Well He Seemed Genuinely Into Me As A Man. After Talking For 3 Months We Decided To Finally Meet Up. It Just So Happened To Be On My 24th Birthday So He Took Me On A Romantic Date To An Expensive Restaurant. I Felt Well That He Could Afford It Considering He Had Told Me He Had Everything Under Control And He Had Pleny Of Money That I Had Nothing To Worry About. So I Believed Him. He Lived With His Parents And They Were Renting Out A Studio Apartment That They Had Built In The Back Yard A Couple Years Ago. After About All!pat a Years Of Dating He Asked Me To Move Into The Studio Apartment With Him Because I Was At The Moment Living With My Aunt Sleeping On Her Couch. By Then I Had Already Met His Family, Awkwardly Because His Brothers Never Came Out To Introduce Themselves Which I Found To Be Rather Rude. I Was Trying To Find Work When He Asked Me To Move In With Him But He Insisted That He Wanted Me To Move In And That He Would Take Care Of Me. At First I Loved The Idea Because Well All Of My Life I Had Always Been The One To Take Care Of Others And Thought Wow, This Is Going To Be Wonderful!!! So I Moved In With Him Into The Back Studio Trusting In Him To Take Care Of Me. We Literally Slept On A Single Mattress And A Blow Up Mattress Side By Side In The Winter Freezing Our Arses Off Because The Windows Are So Thing And We Had No Heater, We Used The Oven As A Heater. It Was Pretty Bad But I Believed In Him. Now I'm A Very Social Person And Love Being Around People Making People Smile, So After A Month I Started To Feel As Though Maybe It Would Be A Good Idea If I Started To Work! He Hated The Idea!!! I Hated That He Hated The Idea Because We Are Supposed To Be Partners. So I Started To Feel Depressed Because it Was Still A New Relationship So I Wanted To Respect His Wishes but I Knew We Needed It. So Literally Three Months After I Moved In His Family Started To Lose Their House To Foreclosure And That Made Me Feel Even Worse Because Although I Knew It Wasn't My Fault I Felt As Though I Could Have Helped Prevent It. (Even Though Now I Know I Couldn't Have Because It Takes A While For A House To Get On Foreclosure So His Family Had Been Doomed For A Long Time Before I Was Even In The Picture.) The Same Month He Had Found Out They Were Losing Their House He Got Injured On The Job And Ended Up Leaving Because His Injury Was Really Bad. Now Thats When Things Got Rough!!! His Parents WeremLosing Their House He Has An Older Brother (now 37) living at home and a younger Brother (now 27) Still Living At Home As Well. His Older Brother Is A Dentist Assistant And His Younger Brother Is Going To School. None Of His Parents Work. So It Was Rather Difficult And Stressful Because I Really Felt That I Needed To Work Now, It Was A Necessity Now No Questions Asked!!! But Him Being Stubborn And Unreasonable Said That It Would Be Better If I Had Just Left. Which Hurt Me Even More Because I Just Couldn't Understand How He Could Just Let Me Go Like That. Instead Of Letting Me Help. So I Told Him I Want Going to To Leave Him That I Was Going To Be Strong And Stick By His Side And Be His Lady Like He asked Of Me When He Asked Me To Be His Girlfriend. So I Was. There Were Days I Didn't Eat. I Was Sad Because There Was No Money For Gas To See My Family. It Was Difficult Because I Had Never Gone Through Anything Like This Because My Family Is Well Off. But I Did It Assuming It Was Showing My Devotion And Strength To Him. Now He Only Has His GED and Only Had One Job Experience (a bad one at that because he was suing them, and he left) So We Were Here Dealing With His Families Hardships and It Was Just Not An Ideal Beginning For The Both Of Us. So Because He Was Injured I Didn't Want to be too Hard On Him To Look For A Job, But To Help Motivate Him. My Dad Has Been Working at His Job For 30 Years And I Figured Well, He Drives All Day, Makes A Great Amount Of Money Maybe He Could Get Him In. So My Dad Tried But Of course My Bf Had To Try As Well And Takes Tests. There Was A Little Problem Which Was Distance. it Was About An Hour Away, Possibly Two In Traffics To Go And Come Back. So that Was An Issue That His Parents Didn't Like So Because Of That His Dad Sabotaged His Opportunity Because He "took a look at the car" and it just so happen to mess up the day of his test!!! Which I knew he did intentionally because the car had been running fine the day before. And That Really Made Me Mad Because This Was A Huge Opportunity For The Both Of Us As A Couple And I Tried. But It Upset Me So Much Because My Father Put His Name On The Line For Him And I Hate Letting My FathernDown. So That Happens, By This Time Its Three Years Into The relationship And well I get Tired Of Waiting And All The Stress With The House Continuing I Started To Push Him. And Tell Him That He Needs To Start Putting Out Resumes and Cover Letters And Stop Playing On His Damn PlayStation 3. Which Was Another Stress Of Mine. I Felt That As Long As That System Was Running He Wasn't Focused On What Was Important!! So One Night I Prayed!!! I Prayed So Hard For That System To Break So We Can Move Forward With Our Lives!!! And As God As My Witness, IT WORKED!!!! it just wouldn't turn on. He Took It Apart And Tried To Fix It And Nothing!!! I even felt so bad that he needed a little piece to fix it and I gave him my Bobby pin lol. Bit it didn't work and he finally started to look for a job!!! Now he did his resume and cover letter and for 6 months got NO RESPONSES AT ALL!!! So o told him, let me help you, help us!!! Let me do your resume and cover letter so that way you can get a call back!!! And we can move forward!!! So I did and as soon as I did he got a call back, a dozen actually but the one he really wanted to get was one that was only 10 minutes away and started off at 11.50 an hour. So since his car hadn't been working and his older brother had been on vacation because his dentist was moving his office to a different location we figured when he got the call to go in for an interview that it would be a breeze!!! Until, the dentist called the night before my boyfriends interview and said he needed his bother to go in in the morning, so the first thing my boyfriend does is asks his brother if he could have his dad take him to work so he could use the truck to go to the interview. And his brother says, its not my problem you find a way to get there!!! So that really ticked me off and them what really ticked me off was the fact that his parents didn't care either!!! After four years of their son not working how could you not care????? So after seeing that and seeing how sad and depressed my boyfriend got it killed me so much to see him on the verge of tears!!! So Its midnight and I go igamingthier house and I yell at them and tell them what are they thinking??? As parents they should find a solution to getting their son to this interview!!! So they just act so nonchalant and are like well if he wants it he should find a way!!! And this irritated me so much and I started to ask them if they could call a guy they had previously said months ahead was selling his car and ask him if my bf could borrow it for a week or two and when he gets paid he will pay him. So they get amused call the guy get the car at 2 in the morning and my bf is able to go to the interview, once again because of me!!! So I make some flash cards and ask him interview questions before his interview so he could be prepared. He gets the job!!! And the first thing I tell him is to get his car so that way I could start working too and get a job of my own!!! And he says OK OK OK...I will...well its almost a year that he's been working and well no car!!! Here I am at home for almost a year getting depressed again!!! And he has no car!!! So after about three months I tell him OK..no car at least get me a dog so I can feel as though I have company!!! Well..its almost a year and no dog!!! So I get depressed and my family says I need to get away for a while and he doesn't like that. So They Invite me to a family weekend in Vegas, he didn't like that!!! Not one bit!! But I was already getting frustrated because he had promised me either he would have his car by now or a dog for me...he had even gone far to say that he wanted his ps4 but was going to get me my dog first dozens of times!!! Well, as soon as I leave for vacation he sees the opportunity to get himself his $600 dollar system!!! Which irritated the hell out of me because he knows I'm falling into depression all over again!!! And he knows how it feels because he went through it as well until I pushed him to get a job!!! We are practically 30 and he's still so obsessed with his dumb gaming. I feel as though I'm not even his first priority the way I use to be, he doesn't want to make me happy although I do everything a f should do and I've done everything and anything he's ever asked not me!!! I cook for him I clean for him I lay out his clothes for him, yet he comes home and straight to his system he goes!!! I just don't know what to do anymore!!! I feel as though he needs to grow the hell up and set his priorities straight!!! Someone please help me understand, am I wrong for wanting more?!? Or for feeling as though I deserve more???
Recommended Posts