TheZebra Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 Hello! Boy I haven't visited this site in a loooong time, hopefully still some familiar faces around! Anywho, I just started the world of online dating, so you could say I'm new. I might not know what's appropriate to expect or even to say, so help me out! I started messaging this guy yesterday that I had a lot in common with. We were sending lots of messages back and forth and then he randomly asks what I'm up to tonight. I was having drinks with a group of friends and told him, asked him what he was up to (he was chilling). He asked me where we were and I told him, and with the drink-induced encouragement of my friends, I asked him if he wanted to join us to hang out. No answer. Still no answer even now, just silence. Was that a bad idea? Too soon maybe? I figured if that was the case he could try to postpone it until later, but still keep the convo going. No idea why I got nothing out of that. Sorry if it sounds dumb - just want to learn from my mistakes so I don't screw up with the "right one" eventually.
jacktheripper Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 Bad idea in my opinion I think he would feel lonely and left out coming and he has never met you in person
Beachead Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 (edited) You didn't say anything wrong. If he didn't like the idea, he could have just replied back with some honesty. You seem cool about it which is good but if I may suggest, try to develop thick skin, especially with online dating, so you don't wind up letting things go to your heart. People do weird things like this all the time. Best of luck Beachead Edited August 2, 2014 by Beachead 3
torturedartist Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 Hello! Boy I haven't visited this site in a loooong time, hopefully still some familiar faces around! Anywho, I just started the world of online dating, so you could say I'm new. I might not know what's appropriate to expect or even to say, so help me out! I started messaging this guy yesterday that I had a lot in common with. We were sending lots of messages back and forth and then he randomly asks what I'm up to tonight. I was having drinks with a group of friends and told him, asked him what he was up to (he was chilling). He asked me where we were and I told him, and with the drink-induced encouragement of my friends, I asked him if he wanted to join us to hang out. No answer. Still no answer even now, just silence. Was that a bad idea? Too soon maybe? I figured if that was the case he could try to postpone it until later, but still keep the convo going. No idea why I got nothing out of that. Sorry if it sounds dumb - just want to learn from my mistakes so I don't screw up with the "right one" eventually. You didn't do anything wrong. He should have had the courtesy to at least respond to your question. He could have made up a lame excuse for not wanting to join someone he'd hit it off with for drinks. Like he has a severe allergy to alcohol. Or he's an android and just never really cared for alcohol. Or he's on medication for Schizophrenia that he's not supposed to mix with alcohol. In any event, he should have said something. 2
Author TheZebra Posted August 2, 2014 Author Posted August 2, 2014 Yeah it just seemed really weird. If it were me and I wasn't comfortable or didn't want to go I would've just made up an excuse and maybe suggested something else at a later date. Ah well, as I told my friends last night, his loss! 1
fred123 Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 Yeah it just seemed really weird. If it were me and I wasn't comfortable or didn't want to go I would've just made up an excuse and maybe suggested something else at a later date. Ah well, as I told my friends last night, his loss! what if he did come and meet you? he reli liked you and u didnt. he acted like more than a fri3nd with you in person. you would have probably excluded him from the group
preraph Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 You did the right thing inviting him to a group hangout, but he sounds like a dud who never really intends to materialize for whatever reason and I'd stop worrying about him right now if I were you. There could be a million reasons for it and none of them are good.
HappyLove Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 His wife told him- NO! You will meet A LOT of flakes OLDing. Don't take it personal.
Dork Vader Posted August 2, 2014 Posted August 2, 2014 Meh you did nothing wrong.. i'm fairly seasoned with net dating and have had this happen before. If I'm remotely interested I show up. If I'm nkt comfortable with it I say I'm busy but another night would work.. But just drop off the map? Nope.. Not unless something serious came up which is very very rare.
Assasda Posted August 3, 2014 Posted August 3, 2014 Like most people said here. You did nothing wrong, dont let it affect you. In fact, you dont need to message that guy again, unless he messages you. You asked a simple enough question
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