baffled111 Posted February 24, 2005 Posted February 24, 2005 I don't know if im being stupid, i probably am, but i can't deny how i feel. my girlfriend broke up with me a couple months ago out of nowhere, i guess we argued to much and that "feeling" was gone. We have remained very good friends, but i dont know what to do now. For a while I was over her, moving on, not interested...but, even though i have the opportunity to get involved with another girl who is great, i cant because i can't stop thinking about the one that broke up with me. no one can compare to her and i've looked. now that ive been hanging out with her more and more, i find myself falling in love all over again. What confuses me is, im pretty sure she's done with me romanticly, but she talks about "our wedding" "our kids" and "our future house". things that sound so wonderful to me i can't stop the convo, but as far as i know she's just messing around. actually the preceding statement has very little to do with what im talking about. i know all the crap everyones gonna say, i know the age-old wisdom and the generic advice. i dont know what im looking for here...I love this girl completely. i truely love her in the full sense of the word. I can't just move on, and i sure as hell can't just force her out of my life. It's obvious that, although she loves me, it is not to this extent, it's on a more friendly level and you can't make someone love you. I suppose it's not that i can't live withour her, it's more like I don't even want to try...but it's reached a point that i dont know how much longer i can remain just friends. i think soon i will either have to be with her or completely remove her from my life, and that would hurt so incredibly bad and for such a long time i dont even want to think about it. I dont honostly think anyone can lend advice here and i really dont care if they do. i just need somewhere to let my thaughts out and at least give my self the illusion that someone is listening. This would normally be the type of thing i'd talk to her about, but obviously i cannot do that. the sheer fact that i love her this much would probably scare her away and out of my reach...but i guess if we can't be together i'll just have to bite the bullet and let her go, at least she'll be happy, even if i can't be. and yes i know there are other women...it's not the end of the world...fish full of sea...if it was meant to be..., but thats all bullcrap because sometimes you just know, and unfortunately im losing the most important thing in the world to me. it's ok though, i'll be alright eventually. and i sound really messed up...dont worry, im in good mental health, my heart is just being torn apart and that hurts. you really cant understand unless youve been where i am now and i dont know hoe common that is because im not talking an enfatuation, a crush, or and obesesion...im talking true, unconditional love...i left my heart open and got burned real bad, not beacuse the breakup was bad but because i gave all of myself and got rejected completely, at least in the romantic sense...lol, wow, i can never post on this site again...everyone here now thinks im a wacko...lol, wow...ok, honostly though, dont worry about me...
Merin Posted February 24, 2005 Posted February 24, 2005 Nah you're not a whacko.. I know whacko LOL and you're not it! It does suck when a relationship that meant/means a lot to you ends.. worse when you cannot find reason to move past it.. and the worst of the worst.. trying to remain friends with someone you love in a romantic way when they see you in a friend way.. The only advice I can give you is to let this girl know how you feel about her.. that when she talks about your *future* together it's bitter sweet.. one hand it's nice to hear and dream of.. the other hand it's painful if those words aren't true and pure.. Hang in there
Author baffled111 Posted February 25, 2005 Author Posted February 25, 2005 thanks...i dont think i can tell her i love her like i do. i dont want it to affect our friendship. im afraid that by telling her she will want to stop the friendship in my interest which is the opposite of what i want. i told her when we broke up how i felt, but i havent told her i loved her since because i guess im scared of two things. one, everything ending like i said. and two, telling anyone how much they mean to me because love is very serious and when you say you love someone and then they let you know they dont it hurts, and i dont wanna be hurt again. sometimes she'll tell me she loves me, but its not the same as i love her so i just kinda avoid saying it back. should i tell her anyway? she asked today why i remembered todays date, what was important about it(somehow in our convo it came up that i did), i just told her i dont know, i just do...really its the same day she broke up with me on, the 24th...should i have told her that too? thanks for responding
Merin Posted February 25, 2005 Posted February 25, 2005 Honestly, it seems that she is giving you a lot of mixed signals.. it isn't a wonder you feel like you're loosin it.. While I won't say confess it all.. I will say that when or if she starts talking about a future for the 2 of you.. ask her why she does that.. again.. bitter sweet ya know?
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