Eddy Street Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Okay, so there's this girl who is attractive and and shares some interests with me. I read her profile and there's nothing I can use to be witty or nothing really there to counter... Here's the gist of her profile: Her headline: "The world is not a wish-granting factory" Her description (some parts of it): *she's a nice person (kind, down-to-earth, family and friends are of incredible importance to her) *she's cool (she needs a man who can appreciate sarcasm) *she's not so serious (she enjoys chatting about Chicago sports or ridiculous TV shows) *but she can be serious (she enjoys chatting about more serious things too) *she has a "passion" for animals *she's adventurous (she enjoys meeting new people and traveling) *she has traveled has traveled to Tanzania, where she has volunteered her time teaching English to small kids *she enjoys enjoying herself, basically (enjoys having a good time) Over all it's an incredibly dull profile, but she's cute. Here is what I have so far: So you enjoy enjoying yourself. Interesting, tell me more... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Don't write that, it's weird. Go with something about the animals.. Tell her your favourite, and maybe ask her what kind of animal she'd be if she could. Ask about Tanzania. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eddy Street Posted July 29, 2014 Author Share Posted July 29, 2014 Don't write that, it's weird. Go with something about the animals.. Tell her your favourite, and maybe ask her what kind of animal she'd be if she could. Ask about Tanzania. I thought I might tell her a story about how I learned just smart dogs really are, when my first dog took himself for a 15 minute walk (because somebody forgot to lock the gate in the yard) and came back all on his own. He stood at the front door and barked, we thought he was inside and barking at the mail man or something. When we opened the door, there he was. If I ask about Tanzania, I'll be putting myself down and she won't reply. I don't think I should use that as the subject of my first e-mail. Tanzania? Cool, I have always felt a deep love and respect for Africa. What was your favorite thing about living out there? uum, no! Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 I thought I might tell her a story about how I learned just smart dogs really are, when my first dog took himself for a 15 minute walk (because somebody forgot to lock the gate in the yard) and came back all on his own. He stood at the front door and barked, we thought he was inside and barking at the mail man or something. When we opened the door, there he was. If I ask about Tanzania, I'll be putting myself down and she won't reply. I don't think I should use that as the subject of my first e-mail. uum, no! Yes, tell her the dog story. Little anecdotes like that are nice to receive. I don't see how your mentioning Tanzania will put you down, but just stick with the one topic to start with anyway. Leave yourself somewhere to go if she doesn't give you much to work with in her response. Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 OP, just be yourself. It's that simple. Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Think about this. You are writing her because you think she is cute, not because she has a well written profile. (It sounded rather generic to me too) It doesn't much matter what you write. If she thinks you are cute, she will respond. If not, you won't get a reply. This is true also. But some thought needs to go into it obviously.. don't go with 'Butthole paper t-shirt szechuan posicle fantasy!' Unless, you know, that's your thing... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Ya know, I would prefer that message over the usual "hi." ARghhh me too! 'hi' is the worst. Or, 'how ya doing?' Maybe if I go online again I'll respond to all those messages with the butthole line. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 The message is funny to me but I can see how it might come off a bit condescending. As in: "Your profile is so terrible, this is all I took from it. I'm messaging you because you're good looking, not because you're eloquent." Think about this. You are writing her because you think she is cute, not because she has a well written profile. (It sounded rather generic to me too) It doesn't much matter what you write. If she thinks you are cute, she will respond. If not, you won't get a reply. Good post. OP, you seem to think online dating is some ultra complex code that needs to be cracked. It's a lot more simple than you think it is. If you write her a tolerable message and she thinks you're cute, she'll respond. That's it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sillyanswer Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Over all it's an incredibly dull profile, but she's cute. I've faced the same problem before, but it comes back to the bit that I quoted. She has a dull profile. What does that say about her? Why would I write to someone with a dull profile? Am I only trying to write because she's cute? What does that say about me? ... and so I don't bother writing to her and move on to another profile. Link to post Share on other sites
rewl Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 "Somehow I think you spent more time sight-seeing than teaching" Link to post Share on other sites
hasaquestion Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Hey, I was looking at your profile, and I just wanted to let you know that I have this fantasy with spacesuits and a Olympic-sized pool full of Jello. Link to post Share on other sites
hasaquestion Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Google says that hello is "Salama" in Tanzanian swahili Link to post Share on other sites
Scales Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Over all it's an incredibly dull profile, but she's cute. Here is what I have so far: So you enjoy enjoying yourself. Interesting, tell me more... OP, just be yourself. It's that simple. Is it really now? I wish people would stop giving this as advice. It keeps people with real problems from every improving. Like someone else mentioned, the response is creepy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eddy Street Posted July 30, 2014 Author Share Posted July 30, 2014 I don't see how your mentioning Tanzania will put you down, but just stick with the one topic to start with anyway Because I haven't been there. She takes great pride in having visited Africa and if I'm not mistaken, most people are not at all attracted to individuals who aren't better than they are in every department in which they themselves exceed. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eddy Street Posted July 30, 2014 Author Share Posted July 30, 2014 Think about this. You are writing her because you think she is cute, not because she has a well written profile. (It sounded rather generic to me too) It doesn't much matter what you write. If she thinks you are cute, she will respond. If not, you won't get a reply. That's true. I'll just be natural and not expect anything. I know the chances of her responding are pretty slim. 1) she already viewed my profile and didn't do anything. 2) I liked her photo a while ago (which caused her to view my profile) and she didn't respond to the like. Chances are she already blocked me and my message won't even reach her. Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 1) she already viewed my profile and didn't do anything. 2) I liked her photo a while ago (which caused her to view my profile) and she didn't respond to the like. Some helpful advice: If you're a guy, just message someone. Don't "like" their stuff and wait for them to message you about it, that's a girl's move. They expect you take charge and do all the heavy lifting. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
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