gd1039 Posted February 22, 2005 Posted February 22, 2005 Stuff like this happens all the time, and I do mean all the time: I had noticed this girl from a couple of my classes smiling at me a lot when I came into the room or if we passed each other in the hall, but we had never talked before. So, I decide I better get off my @ss and go talk to her, so I do and suggest we study for an upcomming test, and we swap numbers. We talked on the phone once, and we decided to meet up last night to study. She had a night class and was going to call me when she got out. Low and behold, the phone never rings. I call her later and she says she is comming down with a cold. We make some short small talk and that was it. I don't doubt the cold thing was legit, but I mean she couldn't call and say "hey I can't meet up, I'm comming down with a cold" Instead, I'm left hanging, and then when I call her I chicken out, and didn't ask her about hanging out some other time instead. I know I know, no ones to say I don't still have a shot with this girl, but I'm thinking that if she was interested, she would have at least called like she said she would. I am really fed up with the same thing happening again and again, with nothing positive to offset it. Whats a guy to do?
tattoomytoe Posted February 22, 2005 Posted February 22, 2005 initiate things yourself, You call her to hang with you. you are setting yourself up to be reliant on anothers actions, IF she calls. me personally, i hate calling people, even when i am supposed to. it's not that i do not want to call, but i think i will be a nag..... so i like it when i am called and things are presented to me.
Sckott Posted February 22, 2005 Posted February 22, 2005 Let her cold subside and give her some time. Call her. If she's still not interested, even "busy", leave it be. You've just made it very obvious that you're interested calling twice. While you may not get a straight forward answer, it's the "she's not into you" thing. Moving on from this then is the best thing.
Author gd1039 Posted February 23, 2005 Author Posted February 23, 2005 Part of my problem is a lack of confidence and desperation. I want a chance to go out with her and get to know her more, but hopes are different than expectations. What do I expect to happen? The same thing that always happens. Although nothing noteable has happened to make me think she has no interest in me, the only thing that gave me the idea she may be interested was her smiling at me (maybe she was just being friendly). I know rejection is better than regret, but it's taking its toll on me. I wish this were easier...
glitter-gal Posted February 23, 2005 Posted February 23, 2005 I can understand being confused but if this happens 100% of the time when you are interested in a girl maybe it's you. I'm in no way trying to hurt you or cause problems but maybe you should take some steps in developing yourself and who you are as a person... self esteem does WONDERS in attracting women. Just don't go and get so much confidence it goes to your head and it explodes brains everywhere or anything...
ttjames Posted February 23, 2005 Posted February 23, 2005 Tell her she owes you and needs to make it up to you since she stode you up by using the fake cold excuse. Make it funny and light and don't seem desprate... Think confident and funny..
clynn Posted February 23, 2005 Posted February 23, 2005 NO way. Yuck. I wouldn't want someone, no matter how light hearted, saying something like "you OWE me" .... ........how about just a "let's make it up next time..."
Author gd1039 Posted February 23, 2005 Author Posted February 23, 2005 Originally posted by ~glitter*gal~ I can understand being confused but if this happens 100% of the time when you are interested in a girl maybe it's you. I'm in no way trying to hurt you or cause problems but maybe you should take some steps in developing yourself and who you are as a person... self esteem does WONDERS in attracting women. Just don't go and get so much confidence it goes to your head and it explodes brains everywhere or anything... lol, I've actually thought many times it must me be, that may be part, but there has got to be more. I mean, I'm not some creepy guy who sits and lears thinking "if she was only mine" and everyone else leers back "hes so weird!" I have a bunch of friends/aquaintances, and probably know more people in any of my classes than anyone else. I only have a couple GOOD friends, but I certainly dont have a problem meeting people. Aside from the modest embarrassment, and the feeling of yet another failure, I probably will still give it a shot with this girl, even if I don't think it will go well. I think the thing that makes all of this even worse is that it seems that all my friends are in these happy relationships, and I can't land more than 1 date, if I get a first date to begin with. dont know what to do.
glitter-gal Posted February 24, 2005 Posted February 24, 2005 Well then if it's not you then maybe it's THEM... (logical answer right??) Are you looking in the right places for potential girlfriends... I mean if you are in Geology (I think from your posts about studying rocks) maybe the girls in there are more into the rocks than finding the perfect man. (Not saying that smart girls don't have an interest in guys, I'm a Comp Sci maj/ Math minor intelligent girl & definately interested in guys!!) Most of it has to do with atmosphere too... most girls in class are thinking about class, not hooking up with their lab partner. Try looking for girls at hang out places on campus and maybe and not so much in the middle of class...
Recommended Posts