C0nfused117 Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 So, I guess a little back ground. Me, male 24 in relationship with this girl for 17 months (longest ever for me), her 22, we live together and have for about 9 months or so. Up until now I have had no reasons to be suspicious of her behavior. UNTIL NOW. There have been major red flags the last 3 or so weeks. First, She has been argumentative with me and snappy. Then, she's talking about this guy at work A LOT. Mostly about how he pisses her off and how he thinks he's all that (she works in a real-estate office). And recently, and this is when I knew something was up, She accused me of cheating.... Now, our sex life has been AMAZING tho, like it always has but she's very "meh" about it afterwards, normally she wants to you know, like snuggle and hold each other and stuff. Not for the last month or so. I am worried. Too the point that I have a keylogger on her Mac Book and have broken into her phone on Monday. NOTHING. And that's kinda weird in itself. And I did note that she has safari set for delte all browser history after the app is closed...... I'm kinda going nuts here and need advice. I love her very much. I've never been in love with a girl, I've mostly played the field until her. I am, well I guess was, thinking of maybe proposing this September. But... I don't know now. Thoughts????
PegNosePete Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 She does seem to be withdrawing from the relationship. It doesn't seem like typical affair behaviour but definitely the losing interest (or has something on her mind) type. Did you try talking to her about it? After you get to the bottom of it, assuming it's all innocent, you owe here a major apology for snooping on her.
karnak Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 First, She has been argumentative with me and snappy. Then, she's talking about this guy at work A LOT. Mostly about how he pisses her off and how he thinks he's all that (she works in a real-estate office). And recently, and this is when I knew something was up, She accused me of cheating.... Now, our sex life has been AMAZING tho, like it always has but she's very "meh" about it afterwards, normally she wants to you know, like snuggle and hold each other and stuff. Not for the last month or so. Red flags indeed, mate. Personally I don't think she's having an affair. But I do suspect that she's questioning your relationship. And that she's been comparing you with other men. She's been "watching the market", so to speak. And she's probably wondering wether she wouldn't be better of with man X or man Y. Don't forget that she's a woman. Women always manage to find a man. They just have to snap their fingers. Countless times I've seen slutty, stupid women, divorced and with kids who never have any problem in getting a man to support them (and I don't mean just for sex - I mean to live with them and form a solid couple). Yet I know plenty of handsome, smart, single guys who have lot of trouble to find a proper girlfriend.
Author C0nfused117 Posted July 18, 2014 Author Posted July 18, 2014 Red flags indeed, mate. Personally I don't think she's having an affair. But I do suspect that she's questioning your relationship. And that she's been comparing you with other men. She's been "watching the market", so to speak. And she's probably wondering wether she wouldn't be better of with man X or man Y. Don't forget that she's a woman. Women always manage to find a man. They just have to snap their fingers. Countless times I've seen slutty, stupid women, divorced and with kids who never have any problem in getting a man to support them (and I don't mean just for sex - I mean to live with them and form a solid couple). Yet I know plenty of handsome, smart, single guys who have lot of trouble to find a proper girlfriend. Well then, **** her if that's how she feels. I can slay chicks for daaaayysss if I want. If she feels that way that she can go eat a bunch of d!ck. Stupid b*tch, she just told me too "stop being overbearing" and "not be such a drama queen". I think I'm done. She's off to work, I'm off today, I might pack her ***** in trash bags and have them on the street when she gets back.
lolablue17 Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 Before you pack her ****** in trash bags and have them on the street - Did you try to actually TALK to her about what bothers you? 3
karnak Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 Well then, **** her if that's how she feels. I can slay chicks for daaaayysss if I want. If she feels that way that she can go eat a bunch of d!ck. Stupid b*tch, she just told me too "stop being overbearing" and "not be such a drama queen". I think I'm done. She's off to work, I'm off today, I might pack her ***** in trash bags and have them on the street when she gets back. Now don't do anything harsh! Don't forget that we're just anonymous strangers in a message board. We don't have the absolute knowledge of things. We're just giving you our oppinions. In the end you have to reflect upon everything and consider carefully how do you want to settle things. It's not good to take actions based on mere opinions of others (us in Loveshack). As I stated, I don't think she's involved with another man. Maybe she's stressed or she has her mind in other things at the moment. Ask her directly if there's anything wrong in your relationship.
Author C0nfused117 Posted July 18, 2014 Author Posted July 18, 2014 Before you pack her ****** in trash bags and have them on the street - Did you try to actually TALK to her about what bothers you? Yeah, a bunch. And just right now before she left. Told me to "stop being a drama queen" and "stop being overbearing". So... I'll just stop being her boyfriend and keeper. She's free. 2
PegNosePete Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 Well then, **** her if that's how she feels. I can slay chicks for daaaayysss if I want. If she feels that way that she can go eat a bunch of d!ck. Stupid b*tch, she just told me too "stop being overbearing" and "not be such a drama queen". I think I'm done. She's off to work, I'm off today, I might pack her ***** in trash bags and have them on the street when she gets back. Goodness, get yourself into therapy to manage your anger issues please. 1
d0nnivain Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 She's upset & under pressure at work. A co-worker is causing her drama. You give her more pressure at home & you have so little trust in her that you are SPYING on her with that keylogger program. This is a an affirmative step on your part -- way more invasive then looking at her e-mail or FB that she left open. You actively don't trust her yet your suspicions are wrong because you found NOTHING. This relationship is seriously broken but she didn't break it.
Author C0nfused117 Posted July 18, 2014 Author Posted July 18, 2014 Goodness, get yourself into therapy to manage your anger issues please. STFU. You sound like a pvssy. I don't have anger issues, I'm just a man.
Author C0nfused117 Posted July 18, 2014 Author Posted July 18, 2014 lol, I'm not getting the help and advice I thought I would here, I don't know what my friend was talking about telling me to come here. What a waste of time. mods can close the thread. I won't be updating or coming back. ceeya.
d0nnivain Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 The fact that she is trying to de-escalate the conflict & your response is to call her names & unceremoniously pack her stuff in trash bags tells me she is better off with you. Now you are calling other members nasty names . . . . Yeah I agree with PegNosePete --YOU need therapy & anger management. Real, mature men know how to communicate to solve relationship issues.
karnak Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 lol, I'm not getting the help and advice I thought I would here, I don't know what my friend was talking about telling me to come here. What a waste of time. mods can close the thread. I won't be updating or coming back. ceeya. No wonder she's probably trying to end the relationship. You're just a spoiled brat who doesn't even know how to behave properly in a message board. Too bad plenty of girls want to date guys like you. The "bad boy type". Yet even "bad boys" pay the price. After they are bored with the "bad boy" sex they dump you.
Shimi Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 He doesn't sound like a bad boy. He sounds like a very insecure teenager. "I can slay chicks for daaayyss". Seriously, who writes like that? Although to be fair to the guy, calling him a "drama queen" isn't communicative, nor does it do anything to de-escalate the situation. It sounds disrespectful and dismissive. ...but judging by the guy's tone, perhaps such a response was warranted. 2
tom670 Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 He doesn't sound like a bad boy. He sounds like a very insecure teenager. "I can slay chicks for daaayyss". Seriously, who writes like that? Although to be fair to the guy, calling him a "drama queen" isn't communicative, nor does it do anything to de-escalate the situation. It sounds disrespectful and dismissive. ...but judging by the guy's tone, perhaps such a response was warranted. Wow! That was quick.
HomanWater Posted July 20, 2014 Posted July 20, 2014 The fact that she is trying to de-escalate the conflict & your response is to call her names & unceremoniously pack her stuff in trash bags tells me she is better off with you. Told me to "stop being a drama queen" and "stop being overbearing". These are ANYTHING BUT a way to de-escalate conflict. If someone told me that, I'd only get even more pissed. 1
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