PegNosePete Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 so as usual...because im not a bad boy, im not going to get the girl wow Right, just because she isn't infatuated, it means she is looking for some kind of cliche, self-destructive relationship with someone who is the exact opposite of you in every way? This kind of black-and-white logic is rarely applicable in any aspect of relationships. Women do not always like "bad boys", if they did then I would be single right now! What women like is an interesting and exciting guy who makes them feel special. It's up to you how you make them feel that way. It's not something many of us are born with. You have to practice and learn.
smackie9 Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 If you guys had read my other posts I see a girl that is trying to manipulate the situation in pushing him. Girls know if they are into you or not, so she wouldn't be sitting there pretty much telling him to show more interest in her or she's gone. She wouldn't be wasting her time at all. I see it all the time on the boards women wanting to know where they stand after only a couple of dates....but to me I think they are desperate and just can't let things take their course naturally. LOPPY if you want clearity you are going to have to ask her straigh wft she wants from you. Being here has only confused you more.
the tank Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 so as usual...because im not a bad boy, im not going to get the girl wow That's the story of my life also . Dont change because of woman tough. You told us you got cheat in your last Relationship. I was with a compulsive liar. **** happen .Learn from that experience. Seek help if you are hurt Inside .
Woop1337 Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 It was over, as soon as she said she was undecided. Move on.
Omei Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 She's looking for the romantic grand gesture......she's a high maintenance b itch, run the f away or she will be nattering at you during your whole relationship on how you''dont get it'' Why are you so negative? What is wrong with some romance? Her reply was honest she's not sure if she's into it all yet and that doesn't make her a bitch nor a clue of what the rest of their relationship will be like your reply sounds based on your own rejection that wasn't taken gracefully on your part. 1
Omei Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 (edited) I think this post is kinda funny Every new couple dating asks the big how you feel question and when people are honest about it, it gets analyzed to no end. OP there is no secrect coding in what she said if anything your now giving paranoia from this forum will ruin it for you. If it doesn't work out between you that's fine its her choice to decide if there is something there or not, not every woman is on this dating time length of how long it should take to like someone. Every woman is totally different in their needs, wants and desires and how they build their relationships be it fast and sparkful or slow and wise. I am very much like this woman it would take much time together before I came to a decision as ive been hurt before and I would want to make sure that the next person im with is someone id def see myself with over a long period of time if a guy wasn't able to go as slow as I needed then id see him in a light where it wouldnt matter of it was me he just wants a relationship as soon as possible id prob move on. Edited July 17, 2014 by Omei
Author loppydoppy Posted July 17, 2014 Author Posted July 17, 2014 btw i know some people would tink shes looking for a free meal and all that but she paid for everything last night
alexwood Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 she just hasnt decided yet nothing bad..not everyone feels the spark after the first date
smackie9 Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 (edited) Why are you so negative? What is wrong with some romance? Her reply was honest she's not sure if she's into it all yet and that doesn't make her a bitch nor a clue of what the rest of their relationship will be like your reply sounds based on your own rejection that wasn't taken gracefully on your part. I was kinda joking about it....if you read further I told him she's looking for where she stands, and maybe is wanting him to make their relationship offical.....pretty much hinting that he needs to step up. And there is nothing in my post saying anything that romance is a bad thing. It's the way she was pushing him....for christ sakes they have only been out for a few times, and they are not even in a relatiohship yet..... find her being pushy. Edited July 17, 2014 by smackie9
preraph Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 I don't think it's a bad thing. I think she's open to getting to know you before she knows if she's interested or not and that is refreshingly mature and sensible. Don't do anything unusual. Take her out on a normal date. If you ever get a vibe she's playing you just to get gifts or something like that, then I'm wrong and she's mercenary, but that would become obvious pretty quickly if it's something bad like she expects you to buy her affection. I think she's just saying she has to get to know you better.
Omei Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 I was kinda joking about it....if you read further I told him she's looking for where she stands, and maybe is wanting him to make their relationship offical.....pretty much hinting that he needs to step up. And there is nothing in my post saying anything that romance is a bad thing. It's the way she was pushing him....for christ sakes they have only been out for a few times, and they are not even in a relatiohship yet..... find her being pushy. I dont understand how she's being pushy when he asked a question and she's unsure of this as something that she wants and would like to date more. For some reason I feel like you feel that she wants to hurry to make it official when he described just the opposite she would like to date more before going into depth about feelings.
Blade96 Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 (edited) Not necessarily a bad thing she did - I was friends with my (online) bf for two months before he confessed he loved me, pursued me, and I started falling for him (I didn't feel a spark at first, either and was very hesitant because of all the bad stuff I'd heard about online dating) But now I really very much love him and we are together. and believe me, I tried everything possible to dissuade him! lol, he wasn't controlling or anything he just did everything possible to show me how loved me and wanted only me. and to prove it. Edited July 18, 2014 by Blade96
bubbaganoosh Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 so as usual...because im not a bad boy, im not going to get the girl wow Nothing wrong with being a nice guy. There's a difference between being a nice guy and a door mat though. Don't be a door mat. 1
alexwood Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 Nothing wrong with being a nice guy. There's a difference between being a nice guy and a door mat though. Don't be a door mat. what he said 1
Diezel Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 The amount of overthinking in this thread is ridiculous. When you KNOW you want something, you WANT IT. You aren't undecided, you don't need time to analyze it. You desire something, you go out and get it. She obviously doesn't want to. Someone who is interested in you will NEVER say, "Well, I'm halfway to maybe liking you or not liking you." She's not excited by him but apparently doesn't have many other options either. The fact that she paid for dinner really doesn't say much either. To me it just indicates she is probably going out with you in the meantime until a better option comes along. I've yet to ever meet a woman with a high level of interest who gave me the "undecided" line. It wouldn't happen. Also, there's quite the difference between being the stereotypical nice guy versus being a good man. Always strive to be a good man. 1
smackie9 Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 I'm going with experience. If I really like someone I amp up the interest, flirting, etc, not say something so manipulative and unclear as that. She could have said, "I have to admit I really like you, but I'm not getting the same vibe from you. Do you feel we have any potential?" Straight and to the point. If she said that he wouldn't be here confused. My guess he hasn't shown any affection like hand holding or kissing, being more passionate, flirty. I believe the term "nice guy" means you are lacking confidence.
smackie9 Posted July 18, 2014 Posted July 18, 2014 And for all those women poopooing me, I don't disagree wanting to knowing a man's motives, interest, or whatever, just don't be speaking in mixed signals passive aggressively by saying she's undecided, then turns around and says she likes him.. That's why I'm calling it a red flag. If this is the way she communicates to get what she wants, there is potential for that poor communication to carry on into a relationship. Thumbs down!
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