Lipitor11 Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 I met this guy on okcupid, so we started texting and talking on the phone. We have plans on meeting up and he kept talking about how much he wants marriage and kids. How badly he wants to pass his legacy and how much he wants his mom to be a grandma. I told him that I don't want kids, he got pissed saying how stupid it is for women to think that. And that they shouldn't be scared. I'm like wtf? We HAVEN'T met in person and he's bringing this crap up? He lives 2 hours away, he starts telling me how he saw a movie where a boyfriend and girlfriend lived thousands of miles apart and how she made this sacrifice that she moved for him. He suggested I visit him and I told him that it's too far of a drive for me, he got pissed by saying it's not that far. And he wants to talk every night. I'm like geez!!!! Give me time to breath. Is he being pushy? He sounds like what most girls do when they first start talking to a guy, pushing for marriage and kids even before a discussion or relationship!
Candy_Pants Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 Yuck. Run. Trust me girl, this can only get worse.
PerfectStorm Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 I agree. You can't run fast enough. Just block his number, he sounds creepy.
Zahara Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 Move on from this. There is no need to analyze it at all. Red flags everywhere. 1
BlueIris Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 End it, decisively and directly. Tell him you're not a match and then don't take any more calls. This guy is bad news.
Bailey621 Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 You don't need to put up with that nonsense. End it now and find someone more compatible with you.
Zippy2000 Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 I wouldnt say he`s being pushy. More unrealistic. I dont think you`re compatible with different opinions on kids and agreeing to meet. These are "red flags" that you must be made aware of and having too many red flags flagging up before you meet. You have to watch out. NEXT!!
Diezel Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 Alright, if he is saying he wanted kids and you don't want kids, why did you not just stop the conversation there? Why did you let it linger? At what point do you honestly decide you need to block him? Seriously.
Author Lipitor11 Posted July 16, 2014 Author Posted July 16, 2014 Yeah, his totally brashness just turned me off completely! When I talked to him he seems like such a nice guy, good-mannered, gentleman like guy. And it's not like I don't want to have kids, I felt like he was forcing me to have a baby with him, I do want to have a kid someday, but when a guy says all that crap, it really pisses me off. Anyway, I texted him and told him that I can't drive 2 hours for the weekend because I make minimum wage and that would be a waste of money for me. He never responded. I'm sure that turned him off.
Zahara Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 Yeah, his totally brashness just turned me off completely! When I talked to him he seems like such a nice guy, good-mannered, gentleman like guy. And it's not like I don't want to have kids, I felt like he was forcing me to have a baby with him, I do want to have a kid someday, but when a guy says all that crap, it really pisses me off. Anyway, I texted him and told him that I can't drive 2 hours for the weekend because I make minimum wage and that would be a waste of money for me. He never responded. I'm sure that turned him off. Passive aggressive. Just tell him you don't think it will work and move on from this. 1
Gaeta Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 I met this guy on okcupid, so we started texting and talking on the phone. We have plans on meeting up and he kept talking about how much he wants marriage and kids. How badly he wants to pass his legacy and how much he wants his mom to be a grandma. I told him that I don't want kids story should end there. Good luck good bye. 1
d0nnivain Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 He has different goals then you do. While I think it's premature to express a desire for kids before you even met the person, it's apparently so important to him that he felt the need to tell you up front. He's being true to himself. Even though I think it was rude of him to tell you how you ought to feel, he has a right to feel the way he does. You two are simply incompatible. Wish him well on his journey to fatherhood but don't even bother to meet him.
leavesonautumn Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 If you haven't even met yet and this is how he's talking to you. Imagine what he'd be like in person. Yikes! It's one thing to be incompatible and another to act like your first meeting will be getting married.
DarkKnight1 Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 LOL Madness. What man would be talking about having babys so soon, aint that a woman thing? bizarre. You acted accordingly
FitChick Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 I'm sure he read somewhere that women want to hear that crap. He sounds desperate. Sad.
Author Lipitor11 Posted July 16, 2014 Author Posted July 16, 2014 And he's got the nerve to tell me that since I don't want to make that 2 hour drive there is no excuse because I don't any "obligations" since I'm single and don't have kids. Seriously? Just because I'm in that category doesn't mean I sit on my ass all day, I do get busy and have an active life. Geez!
Zahara Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 And he's got the nerve to tell me that since I don't want to make that 2 hour drive there is no excuse because I don't any "obligations" since I'm single and don't have kids. Seriously? Just because I'm in that category doesn't mean I sit on my ass all day, I do get busy and have an active life. Geez! Why are you still engaging him? You keep complaining but you keep prolonging communication with him. Tell him it's not going to work and move on. 1
GoBlue Posted July 17, 2014 Posted July 17, 2014 All I can say is that if I were interested in a woman then I would make the drive to see her. How many conversations have you guys had? The reason I ask is because in the "old" days these talks would be taking place by phone or in person. So, there would be a natural progression in what you talk about. Normally those talks would get deeper and deeper. It isn't that unusual to share your feelings about marriage and children as you continue down the road. Going to be honest though, if a woman brought that up too early it would put a huge damper on moving forward. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Blessings!
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