GirlontheLam Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 (edited) Ok I am venting now! Months ago, I don't even know how many any more, I met a guy while he was working (he's a caterer). He was one of those "older" attractive men. Anyway he complimented me on my smile, and we chatted for a bit. I thought "oh here goes another one of those flirty older guys!" Anyway, over the next months I run into him more (at his work). He's always warm and chatty. Then his company is having a special event. He invites me (my sister and my friends). We all go. We get stellar service (and free food), and at the end of the evening he pulls up a chair to chat with us. We all have a good chat, he tells us about his background, hobbies and all sorts of stuff, complaining about his lack of a girlfriend. Anyway, the evening wraps up and we all say our goodbyes. My friends were like...um he was totally flirting with you. I brush the whole thing off because I think he is a little old. Now fast forward to months after. It could even be a year! They open up a restaurant, and I like to check out all the new restaurants in town. I grab a few friends and we go to eat at his new spot. When I walk in, I get big smiles from him and we chat about not seeing each other for ages. We all get situated (more free food for us!). And before I leave he stops to chat bait and gives me a goodbye hug. Then I start thinking, hmm....is he flirting again? Or just being friendly? So I decide to take a visit a few weeks later (by myself). He's there and we chat a bit. He asks me about my last visit, my sister and even some other stuff that I don't even remember telling him! We have a great chat, but I totally miss his hint about meeting up for drinks later. So I am thinking crap! I totally dropped the ball (I also know how old he is now, at the top of my range, but not "overly old.") So I have been trying to get some accidental visits in to ask him out or you know hope he asks me out again. So herein lies the rub. I've stopped by a 2 times over the past few weeks, but the universe isn't quite cooperating. ON the up note, he gives me free stuff. But it keeps getting too busy, so we have to end our conversation. Today I was totally ready to do it! So I saw him after ordering, he comes over, gives me a hug and we have a 2 sentence chat, but someone interrupts. And he ends up leaving a few minutes later, so I don't actually have an opportunity to invite him out. So I am totally crushing on him; he's attractive, we have chemistry (he needs to stop hugging me, it is too tempting lol!), we have plenty of common interests, he is easy to talk to and my friends even like him! And he's a southern gentleman (swoon!) He even lives in my neighborhood! Too bad I haven't run into him out and about though, it would make it easier. So I guess I'll have to try again, and hope the universe is in my favor: the restaurant isn't too packed, he is working and so on. Otherwise it is totally going to seem like I'm just there to get free stuff! Edited July 16, 2014 by GirlontheLam
I am Bud Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 Dear GirlontheLam I agree with somedude81that you should give him your phone number. The next time that you go to the restaurant and it's busy just say "hey we always never have time to chat properly, let's go for a coffee sometime for a catchup" and then give him the note with your phone number. Being that he has already asked you out previously with some people and you have already hung out together the odds of him accepting should be quite high. Mind you it is still not guaranteed if he is willing to date someone younger but he should definitely be up for a catchup with a "friend". Good luck with it - Bud 1
Author GirlontheLam Posted July 16, 2014 Author Posted July 16, 2014 Good ideas guys! He knows how old I am now, apparently I am his sister's age. He did think I was younger initially so I was older than he expected. (I look younger!) There is about an 8-10 year age gap (I am 30-something and he is 40-something).
Author GirlontheLam Posted August 2, 2014 Author Posted August 2, 2014 I thought I'd post an update. This played out a little different than I thought it would! I stopped by, totally in slacker clothing because I was getting over a cold, headed to the doctor and headed to the airport for a red eye that evening! I ended up running into him while he was on a break outside, but writing an email. I chatted with him for a little while. Told him I was headed out to a mini vacation. He said "that sounds fun! I wish I was getting on the flight too!" He was little pre-occupied with his email, and I totally forgot to give him my number! So I went to grab some food, he came in a little bit later. He started asking me about plans for later that day, I was just about to try to come up with some sort of excuse to give him my number. I was like, well I am headed to the airport tonight. He said, "Safe travels! Take lots of pictures during your trip. I want to see them, so I am going to give you my number so you can send them to me." Then he ran off to do some paperwork, after confirming I had the right number. I stopped to say bye before I left and he gave me a hug and reminded me to send him pics. Problem solved! I got his number! I sent a few vacation pics over (landmarks, meals and the like!). We exchanged a few texts during my vacation. So I texted him this week (after I got back) to see if he wanted to get a drink on a particular day. Well that didn't work out. Apparently he has 2 surprise visitors in town staying with him, so he wants to schedule something when they leave (and he had some work drama to deal with too). So the ball is in his court! That means I have to go to other restaurants for the next couple weeks.
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