phoenix7 Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 She was my 1st love we met in college and we stayed together for six years .. in the beginning I was living a very good love story however I noticed that she is possessive and clingy .. I attributed this to the early death of her mother .. and she mentioned to.me that her family were not dealing with her in a good way when she was young .. I was under peer pressure from family and friends to quit this relationship as they noticed she is very impulsive and will make my life a living hell .. however I was very content with the big love and affection she is giving me "maybe feeing my ego" .. I took her for granted .. so when I was here I was stuck and I couldnt take a decision whether to leave her or not .. so I decided to see other girls while we r together because maybe there's someone more suitable for me ia out there but I didnt want to risk losing her .. she found out about that she cried and you could tell that her world is falling apart .. I reassured her and apologized but you can tell that a crack was initiated in our relationship .. we got engaged then shortly afterwards we had a big fight I panicked and left her .. after 7 months I called her back and got back to her and apologized to her family she was so happy and waiting for me .. we did everything but sex we had great sexual tension she liked our cuddlings a lot .. however we had the same misunderstandings again so I left her again she begged me not to dump her but I was so scared .. then I felt nothing I totally forgot about her and went on with my job and life until I met a coworker I felt something towards her but she played hard to get and I.kept comparing between her and my ex and for some reqson I felt that she will never make me feel the same way my ex did .. I tried to get back to.my ex .. she rejected however cconfesed that she still loves me and not in a relationship and cried over the phone . I found out by chance that she is dating another guy and she is doing the same cuddlings and kissings we used to do together and since the I am burning in jealousy and self doubts.. i cant seem to get over this thing .. I know I am selfish and self centered and its all about ego however I cant help it and its affecting my career and social.life .. I keep stalking her and I burn inside when I know she is having good time with the other guy .. although for me it all makes sense that she had to get over me after the 2nd break up and get on with her life .. I feel agony when I reqlize that her love to me is lost .. and I need to know why she told me she still loves me and for a week kept telling me that she will think and I knew she consulted mutual friends .. all what I need now.is stop oobsessingabout this past relationship and start thinking abt my future I know we were not right for each other and I know that its all about ego ..
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