babycakees Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 If a couple discusses exclusivity, and they are considered boyfriend/girlfriend...if one of the people in said relationship want to break up, do you think the other person deserves to be told? Isn't it cowardly to just pull a fade away/disappearing act? All opinions are welcome. Thank you.
JungleLover Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Yes, it is cowardly. My view is that 3 dates and no sex requires no explanation. One night stand requires no explanation. Beyond 3 dates and/or meeting the nuclear family requires an explanation. Relationship requires explanation. 1
Author babycakees Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 I agree with you. I feel that once you've discussed exclusivity, the other person needs to discuss that they no longer wish to continue the relationship. I'm starting to think that if men cannot do this, they shouldn't even be dating.
d0nnivain Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Discussing exclusivity doesn't make them BF/GF. Agreeing to those titles does. After you have been dating somebody a while & agree to be exclusive, yes the dumpee deserves to be told rather than simply abandoned. 1
Author babycakees Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 Well I've been dating a guy for about 4 months now and we've discussed being boyfriend and girlfriend. I'm almost positive he's pulling the disappearing act on me and it's infuriating me. I feel like I deserve to be told so that I can move on and not wonder what is going on.
d0nnivain Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 What's he doing? Can you ask him about it? Say to him if he wants out you're not stopping him but you wish he'd have the decency to tell you.
Author babycakees Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 I text/called him Sunday and he didn't reply but he was active on FB (so I know he's not hurt/hospitalized lol). I haven't heard from him since. He usually communicates everyday. I may try reaching out to him one more time tonight, then if I hear nothing I guess I will assume he lost interest. He had been acting a little distant prior to when I saw him over the weekend, but just assumed it was nothing. Now it kind of makes sense.
GoreSP Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 The fade away/dissapearring act is cowardly even after one date. But if you're going to pull this off after having the 'we are a couple' discussion, you are an a$$. If you can't deal with dating like an adult, perhaps you shouldn't date... (Not *you* in particuler OP) 3
Author babycakees Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 I agree. This is extremely infuriating because I really thought this guy was mature. I'm gonna give it a few more days before I assume the worst, but it's not looking very good.
Fondue Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Holy ****, bro. 4 months and he's pulling a disappearing act? What weasel. Wow. Even if he comes back to you and apologizes for doing so, saying he was "confused," and "needed a few days to think," I would have serious doubts about the relationship and would definitely walk. THat's just ****ed up. 2
sportygirl89 Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 My ex broke up with me out of the blue ( he just moved to my hometown to be with me). No explanation nothing. Just done wouldn't answer why he wanted to break up. All while I was sick. ha coward (to my ex).
HappyLove Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Did you meet online? This seems to be the norm of online. Had this done after 3 months dating. People can be disgusting these days. 1
Author babycakees Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 Did you meet online? This seems to be the norm of online. Had this done after 3 months dating. People can be disgusting these days. Yes. We did meet online. I was warned about this sort of thing too. Grrr. 1
HappyLove Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Yes. We did meet online. I was warned about this sort of thing too. Grrr. I bet he's back on the dating sites have you checked? Also the norm of meeting online.
Elle1975 Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 If you can't deal with dating like an adult, perhaps you shouldn't date ^^^^ If he is indeed pulling a slow fade, maybe OP you should send him what Gore just wrote
Author babycakees Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 (edited) I actually did reactivate my account online just to see if he reactivated his, but no. Not yet anyhow. I then deactivated mine again. Edited July 15, 2014 by babycakees
Author babycakees Posted July 16, 2014 Author Posted July 16, 2014 UPDATE! He text me tonight and broke up with me. Oh well. NEXT!!! Lol
HappyLove Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 He broke up with you after 4 months over text? Ugh. I'm sure you can do better! 1
Author babycakees Posted July 16, 2014 Author Posted July 16, 2014 He broke up with you after 4 months over text? Ugh. I'm sure you can do better! Thanks. I'm sure too. At least it was only 4 months. Plus, I had a feeling he was drifting away. Oh well. His loss. 1
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