Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 So I decided to try Tinder. I swiped quite a few girls and started chatting to a few. Then I met the first girl. We arranged yo go for drinks and it was electric. We stayed beyond a few drinks. We had dinner as well and talked for hours. She is so awesome. Very funny, kind, bubbly... The kind of girl I would want to be with. She invited me to her place afterwards for coffee. Things got out of hand and we slept together. It was great... Now I'm really torn because although I really think she's awesome... There are 2 things that disturb me a bit: 1. She slept with me after 1 date and 1 day of text chatting. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted it, but is it okay? I didn't ask how many other guys she's been with... but I suspect it could be quite a few 2. She's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This girl doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby? I really don't know what to do... so it was a brilliant weekend but how do I proceed?
RyanBeynolds Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 So I decided to try Tinder. I swiped quite a few girls and started chatting to a few. Then I met the first girl. We arranged yo go for drinks and it was electric. We stayed beyond a few drinks. We had dinner as well and talked for hours. She is so awesome. Very funny, kind, bubbly... The kind of girl I would want to be with. She invited me to her place afterwards for coffee. Things got out of hand and we slept together. It was great... Now I'm really torn because although I really think she's awesome... There are 2 things that disturb me a bit: 1. She slept with me after 1 date and 1 day of text chatting. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted it, but is it okay? I didn't ask how many other guys she's been with... but I suspect it could be quite a few 2. She's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This girl doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby? I really don't know what to do... so it was a brilliant weekend but how do I proceed? Tinder is a hook up app and that is what you both did. I'm not sure I could be with a girl that would give it up that easy after meeting you on the same day. It seems you already are in love, especially since you made a post about her. If she is not your ideal, then why exactly did you have sex? Overall, you seem to really like her for who she is, which is clearly a great thing. Weight can easily be lost. Just get to know her more and then decide. It's only been one day. 1
Eivuwan Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 So I decided to try Tinder. I swiped quite a few girls and started chatting to a few. Then I met the first girl. We arranged yo go for drinks and it was electric. We stayed beyond a few drinks. We had dinner as well and talked for hours. She is so awesome. Very funny, kind, bubbly... The kind of girl I would want to be with. She invited me to her place afterwards for coffee. Things got out of hand and we slept together. It was great... Now I'm really torn because although I really think she's awesome... There are 2 things that disturb me a bit: 1. She slept with me after 1 date and 1 day of text chatting. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted it, but is it okay? I didn't ask how many other guys she's been with... but I suspect it could be quite a few 2. She's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This girl doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby? I really don't know what to do... so it was a brilliant weekend but how do I proceed? K, this is from the girl's perspective. 1. He slept with me after 1 date and 1 day of text chatting. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted it, but is it okay? I didn't ask how many other girls he's been with... but I suspect it could be quite a few 2. He's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This guy doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby? 22
RyanBeynolds Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 K, this is from the girl's perspective. 1. He slept with me after 1 date and 1 day of text chatting. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted it, but is it okay? I didn't ask how many other girls he's been with... but I suspect it could be quite a few 2. He's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This guy doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby? Wow, this is incredible! Didn't even picture this.
PogoStick Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 K, this is from the girl's perspective. 1. He slept with me after 1 date and 1 day of text chatting. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted it, but is it okay? I didn't ask how many other girls he's been with... but I suspect it could be quite a few 2. He's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This guy doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby? I was thinking the same thing. Especially #1 2
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 It continues to amaze me that people actually meet up with people from Tinder. I still regard it a bit like I regard people who claim to have seen Bigfoot... 6
Author Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 Thanks for the reply Bro. It's not a hook up app... its a dating app. In love? I dont know, but she's definitely special. Why did I do it? Because we had chemistry like crazy. She is so sweet, and the way she acted when we got to her place... she really wanted me, but wasn't pushy or obnoxious like my ex. Personality wise she seems perfect. So her body isn't perfect but I can really picture us together. Maybe I'm just being shallow. I think so. Wow she is special. I get flutters just thinking about the night we spent together. I messaged her the next day and might have gone overboard telling her how great she was though. But she has messaged me back twice. I'm holding off for now to balance out the first message I sent her. Tinder is a hook up app and that is what you both did. I'm not sure I could be with a girl that would give it up that easy after meeting you on the same day. It seems you already are in love, especially since you made a post about her. If she is not your ideal, then why exactly did you have sex? Overall, you seem to really like her for who she is, which is clearly a great thing. Weight can easily be lost. Just get to know her more and then decide. It's only been one day.
Author Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 LOL. I see what you mean but it really isn't the same. 1. I've only been with 2. Her and my ex. Everyone knows it's easier for girls to get laid. If I was a girl and dated someone like me I really wouldn't even worry about that. 2. Perhaps you have a point here. Although I used to be very toned... I played football in high school. My current shape isn't genetic or anything. I have just been too busy studying and working to keep in shape. I'm working on it. K, this is from the girl's perspective. 1. He slept with me after 1 date and 1 day of text chatting. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted it, but is it okay? I didn't ask how many other girls he's been with... but I suspect it could be quite a few 2. He's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This guy doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby?
MidwestUSA Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 What your model dating friend gonna say about her? 1
Author Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 It continues to amaze me that people actually meet up with people from Tinder. I still regard it a bit like I regard people who claim to have seen Bigfoot... Huh? If no one used it it wouldn't be popular. I don't get what you're saying. I probably used it wrong as well. I just swiped all the blonde girls - LOL.
Eivuwan Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Thanks for the reply Bro. It's not a hook up app... its a dating app. In love? I dont know, but she's definitely special. Why did I do it? Because we had chemistry like crazy. She is so sweet, and the way she acted when we got to her place... she really wanted me, but wasn't pushy or obnoxious like my ex. Personality wise she seems perfect. So her body isn't perfect but I can really picture us together. Maybe I'm just being shallow. I think so. Wow she is special. I get flutters just thinking about the night we spent together. I messaged her the next day and might have gone overboard telling her how great she was though. But she has messaged me back twice. I'm holding off for now to balance out the first message I sent her. The body thing. My first bf was obsessed with looks and did look great himself. Eventually we broke up because I couldn't keep up to his standards. Then I met my second bf who "objectively" looks worse because he didn't have a six pack and stuff like that. However, much to my surprise, those things stopped bugging me after I got to know him better and my chemistry and sexual attraction to my second bf went way beyond the first. Honestly, at least for me personality itself can make someone very attractive and it's a stronger magnet for me than appearance. I fail to understand why people get so hung up over looks unless the other person is obese or anorexic. Another thing I want to point out is that this is the 3rd girl in a short period of time that you are falling heads over heels with and who is very "special." Can you teach me how to find all these special people? I've only been able to find two over the span of several years. 6
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Huh? If no one used it it wouldn't be popular. I don't get what you're saying. I probably used it wrong as well. I just swiped all the blonde girls - LOL. Oh I believe people use Tinder, I just don't believe anyone ever gets mutual matches on there. I've never gotten a single one. I'm not big on blondes personally. But I do just swipe everyone just in case, figure I should play the odds. 1
Eivuwan Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 LOL. I see what you mean but it really isn't the same. 1. I've only been with 2. Her and my ex. Everyone knows it's easier for girls to get laid. If I was a girl and dated someone like me I really wouldn't even worry about that. Well, I just don't like double standards ok. 1
Author Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 What your model dating friend gonna say about her? Well he will obviously have a problem with her but the more I think about it the less I care. He even found faults with my ex so I don't think he'll ever be happy until I date a latina model or whatever.
organizedchaos Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Oh I believe people use Tinder, I just don't believe anyone ever gets mutual matches on there. I've never gotten a single one. I'm not big on blondes personally. But I do just swipe everyone just in case, figure I should play the odds. Your situation and experience with it is in no way reflective of the general population.
D.Mc. Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 So I decided to try Tinder. 2. She's larger than my ideal. My ex had a perfect body. This girl doesn't. Am I being a hypocrite since I'm also a bit chubby? I really don't know what to do... so it was a brilliant weekend but how do I proceed? Mr. Pot meet Ms. Kettle You're young, this may turn out to be something or not. Did you give yourself a chance to really get over your relationship w/your ex? Just going from girl to girl is going to wear you out emotionally & turn you off in the long run (yes you can get tired of everything even sex eventually). Just try hanging w/your friends w/out the undercurrent of finding a girlfriend/hookup etc? Good luck anyway
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Your situation and experience with it is in no way reflective of the general population. None of my friends have ever met anyone from Tinder either. In fact, aside from the internet, I've never met anyone who told me they met someone from Tinder. Not a single person. Now, maybe this is a "I don't know anyone who voted for Nixon" type of situation. But, I'm thinking there's something going on...
Miss Awesome Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 "double standard noun : a set of principles that applies differently and usually more rigorously to one group of people or circumstances than to another; especially : a code of morals that applies more severe standards of sexual behavior to women than to men" 2
organizedchaos Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 None of my friends have ever met anyone from Tinder either. In fact, aside from the internet, I've never met anyone who told me they met someone from Tinder. Not a single person. Now, maybe this is a "I don't know anyone who voted for Nixon" type of situation. But, I'm thinking there's something going on... I don't know you or your friends. I haven't used it in a while but when I was, I got at least 5 matches per week and prob 10 dates off it in a 3 month period. One girl I dated for about 6 weeks. It's not just a hookup app and people are meeting off it. A good friend of mine just became exclusive with her new boyfriend she met off it. Maybe it's different for people who live in major cities. But you and your friends are having vastly different results than my past experiences with it, for whatever reasons. 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 I don't know you or your friends. I haven't used it in a while but when I was, I got at least 5 matches per week and prob 10 dates off it in a 3 month period. One girl I dated for about 6 weeks. It's not just a hookup app and people are meeting off it. A good friend of mine just became exclusive with her new boyfriend she met off it. Maybe it's different for people who live in major cities. But you and your friends are having vastly different results than my past experiences with it, for whatever reasons. Interesting. I live right outside of D.C., for what it's worth. Maybe we do things differently in the DMV...
Thegreatestthing Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Wrong section posted Weren't you in love with a foreign girl last week
Author Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 Wrong section posted Weren't you in love with a foreign girl last week I was in love with a foreign girl but she turned me down for long distance relationship. I'm going to visit her in a few months but she has basically rejected me romantically.
Author Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 Thanks. I really want an LTR though. I am still hanging out with friends etc... but I want a girlfriend. This girl may be it. Mr. Pot meet Ms. Kettle You're young, this may turn out to be something or not. Did you give yourself a chance to really get over your relationship w/your ex? Just going from girl to girl is going to wear you out emotionally & turn you off in the long run (yes you can get tired of everything even sex eventually). Just try hanging w/your friends w/out the undercurrent of finding a girlfriend/hookup etc? Good luck anyway
Author Medium.Lumo Posted July 15, 2014 Author Posted July 15, 2014 I really want to see her again soon but it will have to be during the week as I have a lot of stuff happening thus weekend. I'm not really sure how to ask without seeming clingy thigh. I don't want to scare her away. I am thinkingof asking if she wants to do a movie on Thursday.
gaius Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Odds are she's probably banging a lot of dudes. Doesn't mean it's impossible a relationship might develop. If that doesn't bother you and you want it. Give it a shot if it's something you want.
Recommended Posts