Babie-Girl Posted July 13, 2014 Posted July 13, 2014 ok parents been divorced for over 8 years or something now.. they divorced cuz mum cheated on my dad twice and the second time he almost killed her.... shes been married to the guy she cheated on the second time with, for 7 years or something now.... because my mum cant work she always asks for money from my dad because he gets quite a lot, after they divorced, my dad realized how much money my mum was actually spending on junk while they were married.... shes constantly moaning about how her life is so hard and no ones there for her, how depressed she is, how shes always ill, etc.... because im having problems in my life atm, she keeps bugging my dad to pay for a holiday for me and her to go on.. shes always texting my dad asking if he wants to buy furniture or clothes, etc... she doesn't seem to understand what the word no means.... my dad has to pay bills, hes buying the house, mortgage etc.... shes always so clingy as well.... she takes everything personally and if i dont say 'i love you' or something back she gets really arsey.. my sister is the same... my dad and i have given up trying to tell her not to do something or 'tell her off' for doing something she shouldn't because she has a major 'Bitch Fit' about it.... she thinks she can get away with everything.... aaahhhh.. does anyone know how to deal with two such difficult people....
d0nnivain Posted July 13, 2014 Posted July 13, 2014 Stop trying to parent them & stay out of the middle of their marriage or divorce. Interact with them independently & change the subject when they talk about each other. 1
Ronni_W Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 does anyone know how to deal with two such difficult people.... Yes. You have to love yourself more than you feel obligated to try to emotionally support them. We are not responsible for our parents and siblings. We are obligated to and responsible for ourselves first and foremost...problem is we were never told that little Fact of Life nor taught how to love from a safe distance. It's not easy to do...there's all kinds of self-guilt and the others trying to make us feel (more) guilty. It takes courage and strength of self. But we can learn how to develop, have that...just like we can learn how to have and maintain six-pack abs. It's just different muscle groups, really. Hugs.
GoBlue Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 I am assuming the two difficult people you are talking about is your sister and your mother. I didn't catch how old you are. There really isn't anything you can do about your mother except let your dad handle that situation. You should not be in the middle of it and you should not be worrying about it either. They are both adults and they are responsible not you. I don't know what to say about your sister other than the fact that you are not her parent. My sister and I fought all the time when we were in our home growing up. Now, however, she is one of my best friends and we get along wonderfully. I simply suggest that you not take the burden of healing your family woes upon yourself. This is not your responsibility either. Hope this is a help. Blessings!
Author Babie-Girl Posted July 14, 2014 Author Posted July 14, 2014 I am assuming the two difficult people you are talking about is your sister and your mother. I didn't catch how old you are. There really isn't anything you can do about your mother except let your dad handle that situation. You should not be in the middle of it and you should not be worrying about it either. They are both adults and they are responsible not you. I don't know what to say about your sister other than the fact that you are not her parent. My sister and I fought all the time when we were in our home growing up. Now, however, she is one of my best friends and we get along wonderfully. I simply suggest that you not take the burden of healing your family woes upon yourself. This is not your responsibility either. Hope this is a help. Blessings! Thank You and i am 18 years old.... i dont wish to take control of the situation or parent my sister but i have always had a mutterer mental age and she has a mental age of like a 5 year old.. so its really difficult to ignore her all the time.... sometimes i do just flip and have a go at her and then she has her bitch fit.... my dad has given up trying to parent her and ignores my mum and tried to ignore her when she moans at him for ignoring her....
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