worldexploded Posted July 12, 2014 Posted July 12, 2014 I decided I was ready to contact my ex. I'm 22 he's 21 I will admit that in the back of my mind I still saw us together in the future but I was way more emotionally ready than I was months after the break up. We started hanging out like once a week for the next two months. We always had a good time. Even though he said he didn't want to get back together he made it REALLY obvious he still had feelings. When he mentioned a girl he wanted to ask out the other day he noticed I had gotten quieter. He pushed me into saying how I felt and we started talking about why we didn't work the first time. We were pretty much on the same page about the reasons. Not enough communication and timing. He even started giving me hope telling me how we could make things good between us again. Before I left he asked me if I wanted a ride to my car. Once I got inside he kissed me, french kissed. Called me "his love" and told me he missed me. I believed we had a chance if we took things slow. I felt good about it. two days later he sends me a long text telling me he can't do this and he hopes I find someone. I told him I'm not mad but I can't be friends. Then he texted me goodbye. He said he couldn't live in "two different worlds". Meaning he can't spend time separately with me and his family who he is VERY close to. They didn't like me very much. When we first started dating they were nice to me. After a misunderstanding during Christmas day two years ago. They were convinced I was a controlling bitch. He told me they only celebrated on Christmas Eve so he could hang out with my family on Christmas. He met my extended family and told me he was going to go home. I convinced him to stay believing that since his family celebrated on the day before it wasn't a big deal. I saw he was upset about it and I told him he could leave but he didn't. He said he didn't want to ruin Christmas... When he came home, it was a mess. His family was angry. His dad even said I had his balls. They thought I was changing him, I don't know how. Ever since then his family has disliked me. I never intentionally wanted to be rude or disrespectful but it was hard to act normally knowing how they felt. He has tried to change their opinion but I think it caused him more stress. I have nothing against them but I feel that if that Christmas had not gone the way it did we'd still be together. This is constantly on my mind I keep kicking my self for not speaking up for myself and apologizing to his parents. How can I stop blaming myself and saying "if only"?
erklat Posted July 12, 2014 Posted July 12, 2014 By taking things at face value for what they are. So you're either building your life with someone who is going to maybe be your spouse, or you let your parents control your life for the rest of it. You want someone like that? My dad never run his own life. It was always his mother pulling the strings. I ended up with heavy depression in the Karpman drama cycle and we are not speaking for the last six months trying to fight against it. You don't want someone line that! 1
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