How do you cope? Let me know how to stay strong.

[AeriaGloris]

My ex ended things with me a week and half ago.

 

I constantly switch moods, and though I know he would have given in if I had shown some neediness or communicated with him, I didnt try it. I was tired of his verbal abuse and him taking out his frustrations on me, leaving me on my own for days to mope and feel guilty.

 

NC is best, I know. Thats where I am at.

 

So, How do you cope with breakup? Do tell me. Maybe I can add to my list!

 

Here's how I do it.

 

- Keep busy with work, chores.

- Some exercise.

- Music.

- Write poetry. Kinda jot down my intermixed thoughts there. xD

- By diverting my attention from him to something else. Yeah it can be hard, if youve been constantly wronged by your ex, then diverting attention is easy. You either start disliking them or enter the Angry hate phase.

- On days when I cant bear the pain, I sleep. As much as I can. Makes it so much better.

- Go out and enjoy. I was in ldr, so I saw less of my friends and more of the computer screen. Kinda lost contact with my friends too.

- I play video games, and if you get one that sucks you in. Its great. You wont know where time went.

- If you have family and friends support, then vent out to someone close to you. It helps to share. If you dont have the support card, no problem. You're the best support you can ever have. No one can help you step out of it as much as you can yourself. People will sympathize, some will smirk or laugh at your soap opera of a relationship, but at the end of the day, only YOU can step out of the irrational stupor. Be good to yourself and others will love you for it.

[Always Pondering]

In my personal situation in the past, I did several things to guide me through the process.

 

- Spending a lot of time outside whether with friends or not. This was really important for me as the more time was spent inside, the more time the ex crept into my thoughts.

- Developed goals and a passion for them and shifted my lifestyle around (i.e. quitting video games entirely)

- Regular exercise/weight-lifting and work, that ties in with the goals.

- Kept a journal to record my feelings and my experience that I wrote in less and less as the healing progressed.

- Gave myself a treat (such as a gift to myself) now and then and treated myself with love.

- Read many stories on Loveshack. I love this forum and the community, I'll probably be staying for a long time.

- Took the emotions as is and kept a thought in my head always: Things will get better over time.

 

At first, healing got worse before it got better. It slowly and slowly got better with time then rapidly shot up (in a good way) after a long time. I'm in a completely different position than I was post-BU and I'm grateful for it.