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Should I move to California


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Posted

The girl I have been with for about a year is in the Military and this summer she is most likely going to be moved to California. So she says that if I'm not all for moving out there with her we probably shouldn't be together. Where we would live has been a big issue throughout our relationship. I would like to move back to the East Coast to be closer to my family, plus I prefer the scenary, weather and lifestyle out there. She would want to stay in the military for a while and move where they send her, then when she does get out live somewhere within driving distance or her family (Omaha, NE). So if we ended up getting married one of us would have to give up what they wanted. We have some other issues but overall I enjoy being with her. But I also think I could probably move back to the East Coast and find a girl there and then that whole issue wouldn't matter.

Posted
Originally posted by Hund1976

But I also think I could probably move back to the East Coast and find a girl there and then that whole issue wouldn't matter.

 

do the above. look inside yourself and find what matters most to you and then do that. most likely, your family trumps your g/f.

 

and you know what they say 'bout them east coast gurlz. heh heh

Posted

If in doubt, don't.

Posted
Originally posted by HokeyReligions

If in doubt, don't.

 

I agree, it should not be so difficult. Don't do it unless you are 100% sure or else you are always going to hold it against her and you will never be happy with her.

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Posted

Thanks for the advice. It sucks having such a huge decision to make. The other thing that sucks is that I can't move until the summer so my life is kind of on hold until then. I wouldn't want to meet a girl that I could potentially start to like too much and then I would be back in the same boat I'm in now.

Posted
Originally posted by Hund1976

Thanks for the advice. It sucks having such a huge decision to make.

 

you already know what to do man

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Posted
you already know what to do man

I know, it just sucks, I wish it was the summer so it would be over with and I could go to the beach and take my mind off it by dulling my brain with beer and bikinis.

Posted

Ultimatums are so romantic....

Posted
Originally posted by CurvyGurl

Ultimatums are so romantic....

 

hmmm...quite.....esp when a female says "YOU BETTER MARRY MY A$$ WITHIN 90 DAYS OTHERWISE YOUR OUTTA HERE"

Posted

ok ... my gf's father passed away about 4 months ago and to be honest she's changed quite a lot.

I'm sure that she is going though a lot of paint and it must be terribly hard for her. Problem is that

I'm accused of not being compassionate enough and not showing enough support. This girl means

a lot to me but i'm no smooth talker and dont know what to say sometimes. Can you give me some

clues on things that I can say/do when she is down to make her feel better?

thanks. Ps. she doesnt live in the same down.. so most of the time i see her on msn or talk on the phone.

Posted

Jelly, I think you should start your own thread about your problem because you sorta invaded Hunds thread

Posted

Hund1976 you always give me awesome advice!!! PLus i must say i love your replies to midwest--- where has he been hiding these days anyway??? but to you.. i live in san diego--its amazing here. I bet she would be stationed pretty close. BUT if you are having doubts..she must not be the one b/c if she was then you would not think twice about moving with her and starting a life with her. Stay where you are--where is makes you happy. You seem great you will find someone new. PLus if she has to go to war youll be here all alone. California hold a lot of superficial people.. know that before you make the move!!

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Posted

The ultimatum thing is what makes it the toughest. I don't want to lie to her and be like "I'm definately going to California" and then change my mind three months from now. I am in the military too, but will most likely be getting out this summer so I will be free to move wherever I choose. And if it wasn't for her I would definately be moving back to the east coast to be closer to my family.

The last month or so has been shaky between us for a variety of reasons, so its hard to choose right now. I've told her that but she doesn't want to wait for an answer.

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