ThursdayChild Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 Hi everyone I have a question please and thanks. I have an inlaw I haven't always gotten along great with. She has never done anything horrible but my brother married her young and I found her to be childish and dramatic. They'd fight like cats and dogs and I found she took everything very personally that anyone would say to her and said a few things behind my back that I found out (nothing like lies or rumors or my biggest secrets or anything) and wouldn't bother much with the family. I think she had some mental health issues as well. That being said over the past year she is like a new person. She is more calm, more adult like, less drama. She has gone out of her way to attend my important family events which I'm sure isn't easy for her and is very good to my children, thinking of them and doing little things for them. She acknowledges me in very kind ways on my events and milestones. She even sent me a card on mother's day. I have not reciprocated because I'm wondering...do you think it's time to bury the hatchet? Do you think this is a changed person? Would it be best to focus on the here and now, the good? Thanks everyone
melodicintention Posted July 11, 2014 Posted July 11, 2014 Why wouldn't it be a good time? You failed to mention anything concrete that makes her a bad person worthy of being shunned. Rumors, we learned in high school, can often be false. So what if she was distant, maybe someone spreading rumors that she said something she didn't made her pull away from the family. Forgiveness doesn't need to be reserved for when the person you feel slighted by is asking for it, it should be given regardless. If you do not forgive you walk around with anger and hatred in your heart. Being angry at her is like punishing yourself for her "being childish and dramatic" as it is your blood pressure that is raised. I think you already know the answer to your question.
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