Jason808 Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 I keep thinking about the things she said during (i believe) our last conversation. I know it's bad that I'm re-reading them right now but I want to know what it means, if it's just a cry for attention or if she still has feelings for me. Some of the things that were said (it's translated as best as I could): Ex: So.. no contact anymore? Me: I guess not.. it's just not working right now Ex: Okay Exl: If it's necessary Me: Sorry.. Ex: It's okay Me: It gives us both a chance to do our own thing Ex: Mm Ex: Sorry Ex: But this hurts like hell Me: I want to thank you for everything, i've had the best time of my life together with you Ex: Aaaah same here Ex: I really did Me: I believe you! Ex: I really can't do this.. Ex: I'm feeling so much pain right now Ex: Everybody thinks it's easy for me because i'm the one that broke up Me: Ofcourse it isn't easy for you, breaking up is never easy Ex: No it isn't Ex: And I miss you Ex: But I can never tell you because I'm not sure we'll get back together and I don't want to get your hopes up.. Ex: I know I shouldn't say this.. but I do love you, something has just changed.. my feelings are not the same as they once were. Me: It's okay, I love you too. But for now I think this is the best for both of us. What do you guys think? We were both very emotional at that point since she didn't want to lose me out of her life, I didn't want to go but she left me no choice. Is there still hope for me? or was it just in the heat of the moment?
Zahara Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 Dumpers go through their own withdrawals when ending a relationship. Yes, of course she still has feelings for you, I'm sure she feels sad and will miss you but unfortunately those feelings aren't deep enough to want to be with you. And if she is saying her feelings aren't the same anymore, most likely the attachment willl fade as she moves on with her life. And that will happen for you too but at a slower rate. Best thing for you to do is to start NC and start healing from this. Accept that it is over. Should she ever come back, you can then decide and if she doesn't, you'll be well on your way to getting over her. 1
sugarlove Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 She is trying to let you down easily.... she seemed to be a nice girl but she doesn't want it to end on a bad note, neither does you from what I can read. It's better than mine heaps.. Mine was basically No no no no no no no no no no no.. Keep it cool. You both sounded mature with the breakup. 1
Author Jason808 Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 Dumpers go through their own withdrawals when ending a relationship. Yes, of course she still has feelings for you, I'm sure she feels sad and will miss you but unfortunately those feelings aren't deep enough to want to be with you. And if she is saying her feelings aren't the same anymore, most likely the attachment willl fade as she moves on with her life. And that will happen for you too but at a slower rate. Best thing for you to do is to start NC and start healing from this. Accept that it is over. Should she ever come back, you can then decide and if she doesn't, you'll be well on your way to getting over her. I am on NC for now, it's day 6 for me. Most of the time I'm fine, but sometimes I really got to pull myself together or else I'll burst out in tears. She told me she still wanted to meet after some time has passed but I'm not sure if It's a good thing for me
Author Jason808 Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 She is trying to let you down easily.... she seemed to be a nice girl but she doesn't want it to end on a bad note, neither does you from what I can read. It's better than mine heaps.. Mine was basically No no no no no no no no no no no.. Keep it cool. You both sounded mature with the breakup. Yeah, it sounds like we were mature at the breakup, but the first 3 months after that was pure hell, arguing with eachother, she calling me all mad and crying because I added a girl I once liked on FB (did it to get a reaction, not for the girl). I made out with another girl, she got mad again because she thought I wanted her back etc. It was all chaos that's why we both decided to go NC, we were eachothers first love and the relationship was really good though
Zahara Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 I am on NC for now, it's day 6 for me. Most of the time I'm fine, but sometimes I really got to pull myself together or else I'll burst out in tears. She told me she still wanted to meet after some time has passed but I'm not sure if It's a good thing for me And what you are feeling is completely normal. Grieving and healing is an up and down rush of unpredictable emotions. All you are feeling is exactly what we all have been through. It's going to take some time for you to start to settle down some. You only meet her when you are indifferent about her and you have moved on. Do not jeopardize your healing to appease her needs. She ended with you and with that comes repercussions -- and that means she doesn't get to dictate seeing you when she wants to because it helps with her emotions. That is completely something that you should decide for yourself, but only do it when you are feeling unaffected by her. It's something that you can relay to her and let her know that she should respect NC and that contact will be made when you are healed and have moved on. 1
Author Jason808 Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 And what you are feeling is completely normal. Grieving and healing is an up and down rush of unpredictable emotions. All you are feeling is exactly what we all have been through. It's going to take some time for you to start to settle down some. You only meet her when you are indifferent about her and you have moved on. Do not jeopardize your healing to appease her needs. She ended with you and with that comes repercussions -- and that means she doesn't get to dictate seeing you when she wants to because it helps with her emotions. That is completely something that you should decide for yourself, but only do it when you are feeling unaffected by her. It's something that you can relay to her and let her know that she should respect NC and that contact will be made when you are healed and have moved on. You are right, she hasn't broke NC as of yet. I tried NC one time before but I was weak and broke it, resulting in hurting myself
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