Doubtsforever Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Should I date a man that has many exes and hasn't been alone for not even a month? Is that a bad sign? Is it different if you find this same patter on a girl? I have been broken up for a while now and I am starting to want to "get out there" again. My ex is not coming back and I shall assume this as the consequence of my own actions. Well... Thank you.
Chi townD Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Bad idea. Unless you're looking forward to being a rebound and deal with this guys Ex who will still be curious about his life because they've only been broken up a few weeks....then, good idea (if that's what you want). 2
Griesfootball Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 You said he has many exes so don't add yourself to the list 1
JimmyWeezy Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 If you don't wanna date date but just date, for fun/spend time/go out then go for it. If you are looking for something deeper, stay away. People with a troubled past usually have a troubled present too. It can be a pattern. And people who can't stay single scare me a little because they give me the idea of being confused people who eventually get bored easily and move to the next. Just sharing my opinion 1
d0nnivain Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 He's clearly not LTR material but that doesn't mean he couldn't be fun for a short term. 1
Strength in Healing Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 This guy sounds like I used to be. Jump relationship to relationship, always needing someone. He is likely in a bad place as I was -- save yourself. 1
Author Doubtsforever Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 Do you think that being single for a while (maybe months, maybe years) could be helpful for me right now? I have been thinking of it as my best choice lately. I want to focus on me and on my career and becoming someone better. But I also am afraid of saying "no" to possible good partners. Of course this guy is not an option for a serious thing. Thank you all for your great insight.
d0nnivain Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 They are both valid choices You have to do what feels best to you. 1
Mr.Pine Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Should I date a man that has many exes and hasn't been alone for not even a month? Is that a bad sign? Very bad sign. Co-dependency at its worst. Avoid him like the plague. 2
Strength in Healing Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 Do you think that being single for a while (maybe months, maybe years) could be helpful for me right now? I have been thinking of it as my best choice lately. I want to focus on me and on my career and becoming someone better. But I also am afraid of saying "no" to possible good partners. Of course this guy is not an option for a serious thing. Thank you all for your great insight. They say taking 3 months or so to be single is life changing and necessary. I would recommend this. I enjoyed being single once I understood how to be happy with myself. And now, a long time later, I miss it LOL 1
changchewsoon Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 Just chipping in my thoughts, sounds a lot like my ex. There are certain people that can't handle being alone/single for a long time, hence they will try to find ways to jump into a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship. Risky I would say, but of course if so happens the both of you are compatible then perhaps things might work out between the both of you. However, it is a risk that you will have to decide whether you want to undertake. 1
Author Doubtsforever Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 They say taking 3 months or so to be single is life changing and necessary. I would recommend this. I enjoyed being single once I understood how to be happy with myself. And now, a long time later, I miss it LOL To me it seems like I need more than three months... But if, maybe, the right person somehow appeared during that period of time (let's say, 4 or 5 months from now) I would seriously second doubt what I am writing now.
Author Doubtsforever Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 Just chipping in my thoughts, sounds a lot like my ex. There are certain people that can't handle being alone/single for a long time, hence they will try to find ways to jump into a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship. Risky I would say, but of course if so happens the both of you are compatible then perhaps things might work out between the both of you. However, it is a risk that you will have to decide whether you want to undertake. How was that situation with your ex? I guess I won't. I like the guy, but there are many more cons than pros.
changchewsoon Posted July 11, 2014 Posted July 11, 2014 Well, my ex was the kind of girl whom can't seem to stay single or be alone even for a short period of time. She was the type that needs to constantly be in a relationship, and it's mostly due to her low self esteem which requires constant validation from another party. Staying in a relationship probably made her felt she still has value in people's eyes. I can't say the same for your current guy though.
OK_computer Posted July 11, 2014 Posted July 11, 2014 everyone deserves a chance. Who knows? Maybe you two will hit it off and it maybe true love. You can't always judge a book by its cover or a man by his past. For all we know his old exes were evil horrible people, most of my exes were.
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