sleeplessinslc Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 (edited) I am elated for my happy ending - and I just wanted to share to the loveshack community how NC pays off! Earlier this year, this guy (GUY A) I dated online and I decided to meet up. Since I live overseas, I had to get my US visa to meet up with him. But the day I got my visa approved, he dropped me like a hot potato - just like that. That heart-breaking scenario happened mid- January. I have never contacted GUY A since he dumped me. Even if I felt hurt and betrayed and bitter.After that event in January, I decided to move on with my life and accepted that I made a mistake and must move on. It was not easy but I knew I had to forgive him and myself. Fast forward- March- Out of nowhere, GUY A sends me a text saying he needed to talk me. My response: Who's this? ( I deleted his number. I honestly did not know who it was) He never heard from me again after he replied with his name. Since then, I tried to work out a relationship with a man (GUY B) who has shown me unconditional love. We've known each other since last year but since I was holding out for the other guy, we never really got to the next level. Anyway, to cut the long story short- GUY B and I worked it out and we got engaged just a few weeks ago. The happy ending? Literally the day after GUY B and I were engaged, out of nowhere, Guy A sends me an email- asks how I am- and apologizes for how he treated me - and says he still thinks about me. My response: Beyonce's Best Thing I Never Had. His response: Shock and disbelief. Curious why he contacted me- I did some research (ok stalking) online and find out that he got back with his ex- who is now pregnant. His ex gf has a history of cheating and even tried to get pregnant with other guys when she and GUY A were together. The timings were so so so perfect. I couldn't ask for a better timing. But even though I've moved on to another relationship- I still wanted some closure with my relationship with GUY A. And what perfect timing for closure! And what sweet 'revenge'! I am thankful that I never contacted him when I was upset, bitter and depressed. Things could've gone to a different direction. I am so glad that I snapped out of my stupid self and chose to move on and be better. And I am thankful for the support of the loveshack community when I was feeling down. Rather than contact an ex, share your feelings in loveshack. That's my big lesson. Edited July 9, 2014 by sleeplessinslc typo 2
babycakees Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Congrats on getting engaged! Best of luck to you a Guy B! 3
HappyLove Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Congrats! Wow, now you have a wedding to plan! Good luck to you! So happy it worked out for you!!!!!!! 1
contact1 Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 The thread title is very misleading, came here expecting a different "happy ending" 2
Author sleeplessinslc Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 Congrats life has a funny way of working out Oh yes, definitely. And I like how mine worked out. I'm glad I didn't dwell on the pain and shame but moved on.
Author sleeplessinslc Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 The thread title is very misleading, came here expecting a different "happy ending" Lol! You might have signed up for the wrong forum, then!
Author sleeplessinslc Posted July 10, 2014 Author Posted July 10, 2014 Congrats on your engagement! Thank you! But I think my bigger achievement is my ability to NC! haha!
changchewsoon Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 Congratulations and I must say, you dodged a bullet with guy A. Happy ending indeed it is 1
FitChick Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 As the saying goes, Living well is the best revenge. Congrats! 2
lionheart153 Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 not to damper the happy feelings, but you've only known each other for a year and you got engaged? I feel like that is way to quick...
Wisecrack Posted July 11, 2014 Posted July 11, 2014 Congratulations and all but I've got a side question. Guy B. So he is, in a sense, the guy whose been run around here. Chases after a girl that is not interested in him who only wants him after she is turned down by another guy. The mantra many a times here is that the dude should have moved on, plenty fish in the sea etc. Yet he has now bagged this girl but in a sense she is settling for him. Doesn't he deserve better? 1
Smilecharmer Posted July 11, 2014 Posted July 11, 2014 I have a dirty mind. I was expecting a happy ending massage parlor style. This is so much better of course. I need to go to church this Sunday.
Author sleeplessinslc Posted July 14, 2014 Author Posted July 14, 2014 (edited) Congratulations and all but I've got a side question. Guy B. So he is, in a sense, the guy whose been run around here. Chases after a girl that is not interested in him who only wants him after she is turned down by another guy. The mantra many a times here is that the dude should have moved on, plenty fish in the sea etc. Yet he has now bagged this girl but in a sense she is settling for him. Doesn't he deserve better? I understand why you think that way. There's a lot of back story in here. I was rooting for GUY A because I thought we had so much in common. GUY B and I had so so so many differences. GUY A and I shared the same faith - in our faith, it was ideal to marry someone who shares the same beliefs. We also liked talking about politics, business, we were both passionate about music. Our conversations were great. We had chemistry. But in the end, it was GUY B, whom I didn't share the same faith with, whom I don't talk politics with, whom I didnt have instant chemistry with - who had the bigger heart. It was him who was kinder, compassionate, loving, understanding and all that- despite our differences in religion, culture, lifestyle, etc. Back then, in my mind having great chemistry with GUY A was better than GUY B's golden heart. But I realized that chemistry - eventually fizzles. Sure there are so so so many better girls GUY B could have ended up with. Someone who hasn't broken his heart, someone who was better at making up her mind, etc. But he chose me and I chose him. Thus, the happy ending. Edited July 14, 2014 by sleeplessinslc typo
Author sleeplessinslc Posted July 14, 2014 Author Posted July 14, 2014 not to damper the happy feelings, but you've only known each other for a year and you got engaged? I feel like that is way to quick... I understand how you feel about the pace at which things are going. But I don't think there is a magic formula to determine how long you have to be together or dating before you decide to get married. All I know is as long as you are willing accept each other 100%, you're good to go. If he turns out to be a former porn star, or a drug dealer, or an excon- true love would accept these undesirable things from his past. We're both ready to make this commitment with each other. We understand what we're getting into. Besides, it's not how long you've been together. It's the quality of your interactions that count.
mr_dave Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 I understand why you think that way. There's a lot of back story in here. I was rooting for GUY A because I thought we had so much in common. GUY B and I had so so so many differences. GUY A and I shared the same faith - in our faith, it was ideal to marry someone who shares the same beliefs. We also liked talking about politics, business, we were both passionate about music. Our conversations were great. We had chemistry. But in the end, it was GUY B, whom I didn't share the same faith with, whom I don't talk politics with, whom I didnt have instant chemistry with - who had the bigger heart. It was him who was kinder, compassionate, loving, understanding and all that- despite our differences in religion, culture, lifestyle, etc. Back then, in my mind having great chemistry with GUY A was better than GUY B's golden heart. But I realized that chemistry - eventually fizzles. Sure there are so so so many better girls GUY B could have ended up with. Someone who hasn't broken his heart, someone who was better at making up her mind, etc. But he chose me and I chose him. Thus, the happy ending. It does sound a little like he's your second choice though, when your chemistry fizzled out with guy A (who was your first choice, you were rooting for him) that's when you've "chosen" guy B. You've even called him Guy B, the one you're marrying is "Guy B"!
Author sleeplessinslc Posted July 14, 2014 Author Posted July 14, 2014 It does sound a little like he's your second choice though, when your chemistry fizzled out with guy A (who was your first choice, you were rooting for him) that's when you've "chosen" guy B. You've even called him Guy B, the one you're marrying is "Guy B"! Did you know that there is no real reason why the alphabets are arranged that way? I could've called them GUY X and GUY Y - and it wouldn't really matter, would it? Point is- my first choice was a wrong choice. Just because GUY A was first choice doesn't mean he's the right choice. It's like a test really. If you don't study for a test- you pick an answer that FEELS like right. Sometimes you're wrong, sometimes you're right. But after you've learned the lessons, you're better able to make right choices. I'm lucky to have the chance to "go back to that test question" and change my answer. I choose B because B is the correct answer, obviously.
Author sleeplessinslc Posted July 14, 2014 Author Posted July 14, 2014 As the saying goes, Living well is the best revenge. Congrats! Yes it is!
Recommended Posts