demilichlord Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 I know being nerdy isn't all that attractive to most women of any race but I was wondering does a white nerd have an easier time dating than a black nerd? I'm black and quite nerdy myself and while I've been trying for years have never even came close to having a girlfriend and I have few female friends. My friends are however mostly white and also quite nerdy/awkward as well but I noticed they can actually get girls. For example one friend I have who plays dungeons and dragons with me never combs nor cuts his hair, goes around completely unshaven, wears army pants all the time, walks around in house-slippers in public, wears a trench coat, and speaks in a strangely, unnaturally proper way and yet girls like him. He's probably the extreme example as my other friends are more normal though still nerdy with odd quirks as well. The friends I have that don't have girlfriends I notice seem to never actually try to put in any effort in finding one as they like to stay at home all day. Another friend I have who is now in a long-term relationship with a girl he met was one of those guys who never left the dorm and just watched anime all day, he decided to actually go out and talk to girls and in no time actually found someone who is decently cute as well.
Strength in Healing Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Lmao @ the part about your friend in the trench coat. WHICH girls like him exactly? What type? As for your question... Two words. Childish Gambino. 2
PegNosePete Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Why do you care? It's not like you get a choice. Be happy with who you are! Confident, happy guys get a lot more girls than timid, miserable ones. That is something you CAN change.
Author demilichlord Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 Lmao @ the part about your friend in the trench coat. WHICH girls like him exactly? What type? As for your question... Two words. Childish Gambino. My trench coat friend is not exactly getting models but he does get decent plain looking girls who are somewhat nerdy, smart, and surprisingly proper acting. As for childish gambino the guy is famous as a rapper, producer, actor, comedian, and writer so I wouldn't put him in the same category as the nerds trying to get average girls. Most people i would imagine think he is a pretty cool guy with interests that are attractive to many women.
SammySammy Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 I think the key to your original post is that ... the guy that went out and tried to get a girlfriend ... got a girlfriend.
Author demilichlord Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 Why do you care? It's not like you get a choice. Be happy with who you are! Confident, happy guys get a lot more girls than timid, miserable ones. That is something you CAN change. Im just curious about my abysmal results with women and what could be the underlying cause. Surprisingly way back when i was in high school there were a few girls that showed a tiny bit of interest in me but at the time i wasnt confident enough to approach so couldn't confirm if they were interested or im imagining things so nothing happened. Lack of confidence didnt make girls unattracted to me it just made me not approach. Now im confident enough to approach but year after year goes by and no girl is even remotely interested in me Im just rejected over and over again.
Keenly Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 I'm a white nerd, and easy is not a word I would use to describe my experiences with women.
Author demilichlord Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 I think the key to your original post is that ... the guy that went out and tried to get a girlfriend ... got a girlfriend. Ive been trying this for years and constantly rejected so im wondering what is going on.
Author demilichlord Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 I'm a white nerd, and easy is not a word I would use to describe my experiences with women. Im not saying its easy women in general regardless of race arent attracted to nerdy dudes. It would only be easy for ultra attractive famous people as average guys can struggle as well. Im just saying wouldn't a white nerd have an easier time dating than a black nerd? As white nerdy guys maybe capable of getting interest from nerdy white, asian, or hispanic women. While black nerds especially if living in an area with few black people will have a hard time finding a black woman interested in a nerdy guy, and if they go interracial they will have to find a girl who is both interested in dating black men and has an interest in nerdy men as well . So thats 2 big hurdles you have to get past as girls that like nerds may not like black guys and girls that like black guys may not like nerdy guys as many women expect you to have some swagger.
preraph Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 I'm guessing that nerdy dude in slippers and trenchcoat is actually somewhat physically attractive to women, even if men don't see it. Sometimes women like dudes who are weird because it's somewhat entertaining at least. Men usually think only men with muscled out bodies are attractive to women, and that's not true at all. Case in point, Johnny Depp, short, skinny, weird. Women love him. I don't know, maybe the market for weird nerdy white dudes is greater than for weird nerdy black dudes. Maybe it's some cultural thing, like maybe a little more conservative on the "weird" front if they're bringing someone home to meet the parents. I dunno. But just being nerdy in style alone isn't that big a deal anymore (in my generation, it was the LAST thing you wanted to be). But now, it's like half the young people are very nerdy. I think you actually know the answer to this, and that is nerdy people tend to stay in and isolate and do nothing but sit at the computer or Xbox. So how they gonna meet anybody? They're not. You have to get out and meet people and do real things with real people, not imaginary things with anime. Even if you manage to accidentally find a girl to stay in and watch anime with you, it's not going to be very stimulating. Time to branch out into other interests. That alone will help you lose a little of the nerdy patina. To help things along, I recommend you 1) go to a good barber and be sure your hair is saying the right thing and is the right shape for your face 2) save up $200 and go to a nice department store men's clothing section and ask for one of their salespeople to help you choose a nice looking outfit that you feel comfortable enough wearing, but a step up from what you're used to wearing now. If you're going to want to look nerdy, then you want to look "top of the line" nerdy. If you're tired of looking nerdy, get contacts and let the salesman steer you to something casual but sophisticated. Don't forget shoes. 3) If you have any dermatological problems like acne, start going to a dermatologist to minimize that. When a girl smiles at you or seems to come around into your periphery, that's probably who you start talking to. Good luck. 1
No Limit Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 Nerds always have a hard time getting a relationship. Until it's time they get jobs and all the "oh so hot sports guys" go to McDonald's counters and the nerds go to Google. Money makes attractive these days. Being a nerd isn't actually a disadvantage these days. Yeah, but mostly thanks to "The Big Bang Theory". Quite a surprise when people suddenly started to desperately fake the smart-style while I've been a nerd for years. 1
Thegreatestthing Posted July 12, 2014 Posted July 12, 2014 I read an article it was Straight White Male: The Lowest Difficulty Setting There Is | Whatever
No Limit Posted July 12, 2014 Posted July 12, 2014 Hello OP: Fellow Dungeons and Dragons player here. Having a nerdy side can definitely make dating harder, whether you are black or white. For a long time I never told girls that I played D&D, I would just say I was going to hang out with friends. Now, I don't care. I have no answer to your question, I just wanted to give a shout out to another D&D player. Good luck with the ladies! When I move to the city by the end of the year I hope to find a few gamers to be honest. Living on the country right now and everyone here just drinks. But if I ever meet a guy who tells me he's a gamer and loves The Elder Scrolls: Skyrim... Oh boy, marry me. 1
No Limit Posted July 13, 2014 Posted July 13, 2014 Location is everything for gamer types like us. Almost zero gamers here too. Girls that play games are pretty much non-existent around here. By the way, I love Skyrim. I got all the achievements on the Xbox version. True story. There are/were a few gamer guys around here. But most of them just play through it and that's it, there's no passion behind it. Alcohol just took over I guess. :/ Sooo... do you live in Europe?
Revolver Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 I've seen average nerdy white guys pull black women that most black guys would have no chance with 1
ThaWholigan Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 I've seen average nerdy white guys pull black women that most black guys would have no chance with On the other hand, nerdy black guys seem to pull girls of other races pretty easily where I live. Most black nerds I know have white girlfriends, usually the trendy wendys that live in Belgravia . It is true though, a lot of black girls in my generation and younger are starting to date white guys a lot more! 3
thekid36 Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 I know being nerdy isn't all that attractive to most women of any race but I was wondering does a white nerd have an easier time dating than a black nerd? I'm black and quite nerdy myself and while I've been trying for years have never even came close to having a girlfriend and I have few female friends. My friends are however mostly white and also quite nerdy/awkward as well but I noticed they can actually get girls. For example one friend I have who plays dungeons and dragons with me never combs nor cuts his hair, goes around completely unshaven, wears army pants all the time, walks around in house-slippers in public, wears a trench coat, and speaks in a strangely, unnaturally proper way and yet girls like him. He's probably the extreme example as my other friends are more normal though still nerdy with odd quirks as well. The friends I have that don't have girlfriends I notice seem to never actually try to put in any effort in finding one as they like to stay at home all day. Another friend I have who is now in a long-term relationship with a girl he met was one of those guys who never left the dorm and just watched anime all day, he decided to actually go out and talk to girls and in no time actually found someone who is decently cute as well. Being sort of nerd like is actually kind of sexy to some women. What is not as much so is acting like a geek. There truly is a difference. 1
hasaquestion Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 Being sort of nerd like is actually kind of sexy to some women. What is not as much so is acting like a geek. There truly is a difference. The key is to distinguish between consumptive interests and productive interests. Take following sports. Its not "geeky" in the Revenge of the Nerds sense. Lots of "mainstream people" watch sports. But its a purely consumptive activity. On the other hand, take making a small computer program for fun. Programming computers is something that very "geeky" people do, but if you do that you aren't just passively consuming media, you're creating something. I know one of my exes (I'm not a programmer) dated a programmer before and when I asked her why she'd wanted to dated him, the first thing she said was how sexy it was that he made stuff. At the end of the day, productive interests are good for your love life and good for your life in general. 1
No Limit Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 At the end of the day, productive interests are good for your love life and good for your life in general. Very true. Too bad skills in photo/video editing can rarely be used outside of hobby-business though...
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