Why is she still talking to me? Want me Back? Can't let go?

[d3sigN8t3dDruNk]

I'm not gonna type the whole story cause that would take days, but back in Feb my Fiance left me. We were together 5.5 years, engaged for a year and ready to start making wedding plans. Well i heard news from the grapevine (from her friends husband actually) that she was hanging out with a guy she met while studying at her friends house after school. Bare in mind, I had never talked to this guy period, and he send me a facebook msg out of the blue telling me this stuff. She left me the next day after I heard about it. I asked her who the guy was, and she said just a friend. All the evidence I've read/seen/heard points to cheating, but she denies it. I never told her everything I knew, I just asked about this guy. Yet she was dating the guy that same day, and tells me nothing happened before she left me. It COULD be true, but I highly doubt it. I wasn't born yesterday.

 

Anyways, to get to the point, I have a 7 year old son that my ex-fiance has been around since we got together. They formed a bond, a love deeper then a mother/son connection and it was almost instant and thats one of the reasons i fell in love with her in the first place. He acted as tho she was his mom and so did she. His real mom isn't that great so it worked out in his favor. Well when she left, he was destroyed naturally. Me and her have had several conversations since she left about things, and feelings and what not and each time her reasoning for leaving was different so I know shes FOS.

 

She won't stop msging me on facebook. I don't reply. Shes always asking me how hes doing and can't let it go. We got into a huge fight right before she finally moved all of her stuff out of my house back in april bc I wouldnt tell her when his baseball games were so she could go. I felt it wasn't appropriate and too soon. She kept asking me about him, finally I told her everything I knew over a couple of facebook msgs. Great detail, and even after that she still denied cheating. So I cut all contact, haven't heard from her since end of May. Now I get another msg from her asking about him. I love this woman dearly, and even after everything, I still do.

 

My question is, WHY? She don't want me, why would she even bother asking? I get she cares about him, but we are a package deal. She can't have him, and not me. She has another boyfriend, i don't know who he is, or what he looks like and I don't even care. All you ladies out there, what does this mean? I didn't chase her when she left, I don't feel you should have to chase someone to be happy. I didnt send her countless msgs begging her to come home. I never did any of that. All contact was initiated BY HER, not me. But why is she msging me? Can she just not let go? Does she want this back and regrets everything shes done just doesnt know how to say it or think I'll think shes pathetic?

Edited July 9, 2014 by d3sigN8t3dDruNk

[PegNosePete]

Who cares why? Fact is, she doesn't want you back, otherwise she would be beating down your door begging apologies and promising to do ANYTHING to make it right. But she isn't doing that, is she?

 

Block her. Until/unless she wants to make a full confession, apology and proper attempt to reconcile, NC her.

[d3sigN8t3dDruNk]

Im not replying to her. Lets get that straight. its FB, I didn't even read her msg, so it wont label it as "read" to her. All I read was the notification that popped up on my phone. But it does matter why, why is she even bothering to msg me. It has to mean something, even if its little, it does.

[Strength in Healing]

This should be in the breakup forum.

 

 

That being said...

 

 

 

Chances are she ISN'T over you, and ISN'T sure she made the right choice. She is LIKELY reaching out to you because her and her current BF are having a rough time(s).

 

Don't ever give her another chance. I know you desperately want her back. But you need to understand -- THIS is who she really is. The woman you fell in love with is an illusion. She is really a self-centered, selfish idiot. The end.

[PegNosePete]

It means she wants you back.

 

Oh wait, no it doesn't! No it does NOT matter why she sent it! How could anyone here know why she did it? Make up a reason if you like. It means she wants to make you mad.

 

Now BLOCK her, before all this over-thinking makes you crazy!

[d3sigN8t3dDruNk]

This should be in the breakup forum.

 

 

That being said...

 

 

 

Chances are she ISN'T over you, and ISN'T sure she made the right choice. She is LIKELY reaching out to you because her and her current BF are having a rough time(s).

 

Don't ever give her another chance. I know you desperately want her back. But you need to understand -- THIS is who she really is. The woman you fell in love with is an illusion. She is really a self-centered, selfish idiot. The end.

 

 

Oh I agree fully. I've already accepted that person I loved is dead. I just don't understand why she won't leave me alone. I know what my feelings are, that don't mean I'm stupid and want her back cause I don't. I also can't block her either, cause she owes me money and she has to be able to contact me when she sends me western union transfers.

Edited July 9, 2014 by d3sigN8t3dDruNk