GavinDye88 Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Hi guys, Cutting the story sort i met a girl on a night out,kissed and got her number etc,Took her for drinks on date 1, went really, really well, ended up going back to hers on the first night as i missed my train home and we just kissed and cuddled in bed because she wanted to stick to her rule and not ruin it by having sex on the first date which i respected. So as the first date went really well i arranged a 2nd date 2weeks later,went for a meal and then for drinks after and again everything was going great,she initiated nearly all of the kissing,holding hand etc. But heres where i get abit lost, she mentioned towards the end of the 2nd date"she doesn't know where she stands with me"because i hardly text/called her inbetween dates well obviously not as much as she liked.Thing is she never initiates a text/call herself it's always me having to do it so i thought if she was really interested in me she would at least start the odd convo here and there and i hinted at that.I said"the only reason i don't contact you everyday is because i don't wanna become that annoying person who wont leave you alone etc" she was really excited for a third date so about 4 days later i asked her out over the weekend but she was working all weekend so i said how about next week and she said"I'll let ya know cause she has 2 essays due in for her degree in the next 2weeks". Im so confused is she trying to sutley say "i dont wana see you" or shud i keep at it and ask her out again and if so, when? I texted her today and it was going well but then she randomly didnt reply and i was about to ask what she had planned for this week and then move in to asking her out again depending on what she said. Should i leave it for a few days before asking about the 3rd date again of wait a week or even longer? im so confused! Any advice would be a great help, Cheers!
Gaeta Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 she initiated nearly all of the kissing,holding hand etc. Why is she the one that did all the initiating? You need to show your interest as well. She keeps track of how many times she had to initiate and that will influence her in having interest in you or losing interest in you. she mentioned towards the end of the 2nd date"she doesn't know where she stands with me"because i hardly text/called her inbetween dates well obviously not as much as she liked. So here you have it. The fact she initiated all the touching during the date + she feels you don't contact her often enough is concerning her. Thing is she never initiates a text/call herself it's always me having to do it so i thought if she was really interested in me she would at least start the odd convo here and there and i hinted at that.I said"the only reason i don't contact you everyday is because i don't wanna become that annoying person who wont leave you alone etc" Girls do that when they feel the guy isn't too much into them, we give you space to show your worth. She initiated a lot during dates so now she would like you to show some initiative, at least more then what you've been showing. she was really excited for a third date so about 4 days later i asked her out over the weekend but she was working all weekend so i said how about next week and she said"I'll let ya know cause she has 2 essays due in for her degree in the next 2weeks". I don't see anything wrong with that. Im so confused is she trying to sutley say "i dont wana see you" no, she is busy, she told you. or shud i keep at it and ask her out again and if so, when? I texted her today and it was going well but then she randomly didnt reply and i was about to ask what she had planned for this week and then move in to asking her out again depending on what she said. Should i leave it for a few days before asking about the 3rd date again of wait a week or even longer? im so confused! Why would you leave it for a few days, or even more, when she loudly expressed to you that you don't initiate often enough? Why do you think doing the opposite of what she's asked you will ameliorate the situation? So lets summarize here. The girl asked you to initiate more often. About you do that? 1
Cunning_Linguist Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 First off, here is a rule I always follow. After spending time with a girl, I always text her afterwards (that night or next day) telling her how I had a great time with her, and revisit some details that I enjoyed. This is so she feels like it wasn't just about the hook up. Next, I always send her a text once in a while to see how she is doing. Even if she is just a **** buddy, I still do this to keep the thread active. Shows you are thinking about her. I'm not texting her constantly, just dropping a line here and there to say what up. This just makes it so things don't get complicated like your situation. Who knows what she is saying? The only impression that I got were that she want's you to lead the interaction, and show your intent. Which is something you should always do. All you can do is hit her up, tell her you want to see her, and if she continues to flake, move on to the next. I used to spend time wondering about things like you, but nowadays I take the lead and go for what I want. Be proactive instead of reactive. Genuine instead of playing games. Shoot her a line, tell her you enjoyed spending time with her, and want to see her again soon. Also, remember to keep the thread going, don't hang out with her then go cold like that. Sends the wrong signals, unless you just want a **** buddy.
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