scobro Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 what I find so hard because I am not this type of person.Is how do people just jump into another relationship so quick or are able to change partners like socks after years together.My recent ex just goes on POF and jumps into a new relationship like she never missed a beat, or I ever existed.I could never do that I would feel so um-comfortable with another woman right now and I was the one who ended it. To answer your question the way I got over it was to never talk or see her.Its just too hard and it turns your thinking into fantasy scenarios and assuming situations about your ex that may or not be true.I am the type that wants the truth and I find myself playing detective and trying to peice together situations and rationalize my ex behavior.There was some sort of infidelity I am sure but I will never get the truth and it drives me crazy thinking about it. I made the mistake of going to meet her and we ended up not meeting because she was late and we got into a huge fight and and argument that put me back months.So NC is the only way to move on and be healthy again.I still have anxiety pain and wake up thinking about it but it will only get better if I don't know what she is up to and who she is with because it causes too much pain.
Chi townD Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Dude, time to start making positive changes in your life. Start going to the gym. Get a new hairstyle and buy some new clothes. Something people are going to notice and like. Go to the gym and run your ass off on the treadmill and push some weight. This will help you burn off some of that stress and frustrations you're having. Plus, if you eat right and get plenty of sleep, you be working towards that ripped bod that women are going to love. Then, get new hobbies. With those hobbies, there are usually clubs in your area. Join them. Join a running club, or a cycling club. Take dive lessons or a cooking course. Get out and start meeting new people! Put yourself out there. And finally, travel. Go see something new. Get out of your current environment. Pick a place that you've always wanted to see, save and go! You've got nothing stopping you now! Go see the world! Start making positive changes.
JackieOver Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 how do people just jump into another relationship so quick or are able to change partners like socks after years together I hear you, loud and clear. Felt the exact same way when my ex dumped me after being more than 9 years together. I realized that in most breakup scenarios where one partner "seems" to move on with uncanny ease while the other is left behind hurting like hell, the one having 'no problem' moving on, usually was already involved with someone else prior to the breakup. That isn't always the case of course but it is certainly high up there with breakups where one partner drops you and finds another in record time and is "seemingly" all happy and content. Note however, that even if your ex has moved on with someone new before you broke up with her, it doesn't mean she's happy in the new RS unless your RS with her was just the pits. Remember, the new RS your ex is now enjoying is well ... new and new things are exciting, fun, amazing, wonderful and what not. But once the 'newness' wears off (and it will in due time), that's when most exes realize the grass isn't greener on the other side. More often than not, the grass they thought was greener, has even more weeds in it. Besides, when your ex has already been forming a new RS behind your back, as did mine, before you two broke up, it means she was actually cheating on you. No need to hang around for someone like that. 1
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