Saki83 Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 My ex-boyfriend and I (i'm 31, he's 26) both work at the same company, (its where we met) we started seeing each other and within a few months we were living together. Things had always been good. We had a few issues with the fact that we work and lived together but it was never anything major. Long story short the past 2 months have seen us both bickering at each other. It reached a point where we had a sit down chat about things and had agreed to change some things, like not bringing work home & i'd agree to make more of an effort to spend time with his close friends (this was always an issue with him). He agreed to "see how things went". He would still kiss me when he went out but as soon as I went to do the same, it was always a no. He said he wanted time and space to work things out in his head and during that time he didnt want me touching him or kissing him. We were still sleeping in the same bed so I figured that things couldnt be too bad or he would have moved into the other room. So I respected his wish and gave him space.I left home for a few days to let him and myself have time on our own to sort ourselves out. I didnt want to leave but I felt it was the right thing to do. A few days apart and I get a phonecall from him saying "Its over". I was absolutely stunned. I honestly thought that the break apart would do us both good and I'd come back and we'd work through things. I came back and spoke to him face to face and asked why it was over, why couldnt we try to work things through. He said he loved me but the past few months have been too difficult and he didnt feel like he was "in love with me" anymore. I'd asked why he'd agreed to give us a chance before I'd left and now suddenly I'm not getting that anymore and he said "I dont believe you would have tried". As we were talking he'd asked me to sit next to him and I started crying, he held me and kept kissing me on the head and stroking my arm. He kept saying "talk to me". So I did, first of all I'd said that it didnt matter what I said because he'd made up his mind and whatever I said wasnt going to change it. He said he didnt know.Then I told him that this was what I was missing, the closeness and that it was all I'd wanted. After a while he got up and started packing his things, was acting all happy around me. He said that right now he just wants to be on his own. I am so confused. I dont know what to do. I love this guy to bits and he knows it. I want him back. He has to come back to collect more of his stuff and ive got to see him at work all the time. Should I just accept that he doesn't want this anymore even though 5 months ago we were talking about starting a family or should I give him time?
d0nnivain Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 You should accept that it's over & work out a strategy for yourself as to how you will deal with work.
Author Saki83 Posted July 7, 2014 Author Posted July 7, 2014 I did contact his friends and apologize to them for not making an effort because I honestly did want to get to know them. Its just that I dont find it easy to make friends so it was taking longer than normal. They're sad about what has happened and they said to me either way things will get better. I'm starting to get to grips that its over. We settled up on bills today, I didnt want to contact him but I had to. I just find his behaviour strange because one min he wont contact me, then the next he's cuddling me, then I get people telling me that he's not sleeping and that he's put on facebook "I wish I could press a button and make everything ok" yet at the same time he's pressing on with moving out. This whole break up has been a shock to not only me but even all our friends and both our families. We'd been together for nearly 2 and a half years and we'd never really even had an argument. I think he was scared that things were getting too comfortable. Or maybe I'm just trying to find something to cling on to I dunno
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