spirius Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 I've been living with a girl for the last 6 months and for the last 2 months she has been lift sharing with a work mate. He started being quite inappropriate and her approach was to brush it off rather than confront. It began to escalate and it became a bone of contention how she was handling it, with her feeling I was trying to micro manage the situation. I argued she could nip it in the bud before it escalated to a situation that would make everyone really uncomfortable. Anyway as a result of the tension, she moved out to get some space and we continued dating but I felt that she was mentally backing off. Then we broke up two weeks ago, after five days of NC she called me, we met up and we seemed to have to past it all...great week, she said everything felt so different and then she started back at work. No contact Monday night, she stood me up and claimed to have slept through Tues, didn't see Weds...all the time I was waiting to see her as she was going away on Friday. She said she might come stay after her shift on Thursday. No sign of her. Friday night she posts a letter saying that she went in to his for coffee Monday night and they cuddled on sofa as she realised she would miss him if he moved jobs as he suggested. She then went to his house on Thursday after her shift instead of coming to see me...they snogged and groped etc. Everyone is telling me to accept it is over and I did try and fight for it, but what is getting me is that now she is away on holiday having said she does not know what she wants and cannot trust herself, and her best friend corroborates this...I am left wondering if I matter even a little to her, whether she is thinking on how hurt I am etc. On Friday when I saw her she was distraught, so obviously mortified at what she had done and extremely distressed...saying she still loves me, but maybe not enuff if capable of this. She said that when we are together, she feels great but during extended night shift weeks, she feels distanced and like it waxes and wanes...she spends like 14 hours a day with this guy and gets maybe one day off a month with me due to her job. I was attracted to her because she was such an honest, loyal and moral person...this is now shattered but Im having trouble reconciling the girl of this week with the girl I lived with for 6 months...finding it hard to accept that sweet girl is gone, the girl who only last week was hugging me like a koala does a tree and saying how great it all felt.
Chi townD Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 Lets see...she lied to you. She ditched you to spend time with him, SHE SLEPT WITH HIM!!! Do not buy that crap about a snog and a grope. One thing about cheaters, they will tell you the bare minimum to make it seem not as bad as what truly happened. Dude, move on. Start NC on her and get on with your life. Time to heal. If she feels "confused", then you can ease that confusion by taking yourself out of the picture.
Author spirius Posted July 8, 2014 Author Posted July 8, 2014 [i got so upset when she told me, I’m worried all she is leftwith is memories of me like that and it will taint the whole relationship inher mind
Chi townD Posted July 8, 2014 Posted July 8, 2014 You got upset. YOU'RE ALLOWED TO!! You just found out that the girl you're into just slept with (snogged and groped) another dude! And if that's the last image that she has of you. Then, I say, GOOD!!!! Hopefully, she'll feel guilty about it. Let her learn that her actions actually hurt people. This isn't your fault. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Now go NC and start making positive changes in your life. Get your revenge and the best revenge to get is to lead a damn good life. 1
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