devianceisus Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 Hello everybody! I've had a relationship with my ex girlfriend for three years and we broke up in October 2013. We heard each other almost on a daily basis for 5 months but after that she only called me once a month and right now we have been in NC for 37 days which is the record. I don't know if she still loves me but I still love her so much and can't forget about her. I really miss her and all the good stuff we did together and I think she does too but she is too proud to tell me that. However, I decided to call her tomorrow to see her again because we saw each other only 2 times since October 2013 and it was quite nice and we had a great talk and everything after which I left. I decided that I will call her if she wants to meet for coffee and I am determined to tell her how I feel and if she is ready to reconsider our relationship at last. I probably know the answer that she will say no but I've got nothing else to do because I followed the steps to being better and everything but it didn't work. I have been dating other girls but I still love her and I think that if I say her the truth how much I love her still I will get a burden of my chest. At least I think I will know for sure what is going in her head... I need to know that. I just can't have this feeling inside me because I really have an urge to tell her what I feel. Please help me guys! What do you think about my (probably stupid) decision? I really need some advice if you know what to do or what do you suggest me? Thank you everyone in advance and I really hope something good will come out of this call...
rec88 Posted July 8, 2014 Posted July 8, 2014 Let me clear up some misunderstandings here. 1. If she's too proud to tell you that she misses you, she's not worth taking back. If she actually doesn't miss you, she's not worth taking back. Either way, she's not worth taking back. 2. You have seen her two times since October. That is two times too many. 3. You say you have followed the steps to being better. No, you haven't. You derailed that when you stayed in contact all that time. 4. You think you need to know what is going on in her head. No, you don't. The bottom line here is you need to be prepared for the worst possible outcome, and it doesn't sound like you are. You know this is a bad idea. Everyone on this site knows it's a bad idea. Please don't do it. 2
Mr.Pine Posted July 8, 2014 Posted July 8, 2014 What do you think about my (probably stupid) decision? . You said it. It's stupid.
redbaron005 Posted July 8, 2014 Posted July 8, 2014 Terrible, terrible idea. Even if you somehow forgave her for cheating on you while away - she still did it in a very planned way and that was quite immature and disrespectful to you. No budging on NC here, she's not ready and you are not ready.
EverLastluv Posted July 8, 2014 Posted July 8, 2014 its up to you if you want a cheater back (because you love her) also get ready for a rejection if she dont want you, IF she takes you back get ready for her cheatings over and over again.
Author devianceisus Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 Thank youi guys for the advices, I will be stupid and call her to see what she's doing anyway. I've got nothing to lose so I think that I will feel better at least if I hear her...
Simon Phoenix Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Thank youi guys for the advices, I will be stupid and call her to see what she's doing anyway. I've got nothing to lose so I think that I will feel better at least if I hear her... Doing something because you "have nothing to lose" is one of the worst justifications for doing something on this planet. Because there's always something to lose. And no, you haven't taken all the steps to recovery. You've cut corners and you've been lazy. All you are going to do is devastate yourself and make her feel really f--king awkward. And you are begging for someone who cheated on you? How little dignity do you have? If by some miracle she does take you back, she's going to cheat on you ten-fold -- there's absolutely no consequences for her cheating because you are such a spineless weakling. 1
Smarty Pants Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 You do have something to lose. If you're hoping something good comes out of this, then you are emotionally invested still. You are running the unnecessary risk of getting hurt. I see other people have said she cheated on you. I can understand still loving her, but she has given no indication of wanting to reconcile. You look so weak running back to the girl who cheated on you. For your sake I hope you don't make this call. You might think it will make you feel better, but from reading your post I will tell you that it probably will not.
erklat Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 This idea is so terrible that I'm feeling the pain meant for you already.
rec88 Posted July 10, 2014 Posted July 10, 2014 ...I don't think I've ever seen so much good advice get ignored in my life.
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