leeutalkin2me Posted February 19, 2005 Posted February 19, 2005 Ive read losts of posts, the advice and encouragement offered 2ppl Would just like some opinions and advice on my dating situation. Some people may remember me posting the beginning of this story once before. There was a girl at work, she had been there a while and never had the opportunity to talk to her, she is stunning, if im honest the exact type of girl physically i would have dreamed up in my head. I found out she was going to Oz for 3months, and managed to talk to her about it, and couple of weeks before she left talked loads about my travel and trip to Oz etc. I was real happy cos she is lovely but gutted i was talking to her and she was leaving. It makes it worse that she is such a nice girl when have talked. Never had any confidence with the girls. well nothing more than friendship Anyway she has been back at work for a few weeks, she came back while i was away. Today just managed to pass her in the corridor and both said Hi, she kinda held back so i knew should ask how her trip was. Stood n talked bout what she had done and compared it to mine as we went to the same place in Kuala Lumpur. It was great talking with her again. Just back in a muddle now, of just thinking she is so so nice. Have emailed her couple of my pics that she would recognise of kuala lumpur n she sent me some of her from OZ n mentioned a few things and i have replied. Havent a clue if she is interested in me anymore than just chat sharing experiences or anything. I just hope i dont obsess about her in my head now she is back lol just dont think I have it in me to ask her. To me she is like Chelsea in the Premier League and Im languising Mid Table in 2nd Division I have too many negative thoughts about myself in this situation lol like she is too good for me etc, she wudnt b interested, or id b turned down n gutted. So gonna have to see what happens, see if she shows a real interest, maybe she has already and i just havent picked it up or acted on it. The Fact is, Ive never asked someone out before, let alone even go on a date, so it would all be totally new for me and so difficult. Wouldnt have a clue how to even ask or what to do if were gonna go somewhere together. Im trying to change into a more positive person. Ppl say the right person will come along, but well ive waited all my life and nothing. Just bottle out of it so often. The wierd thing is, iprobs have more female friends than anything, loads at work who come in and see me n chat n stuff especially, they all tell me im a great person, but sometimes i just dont see it and think that no one is interested in me more than a friend. I dont wanna get my hopes up anyway. Hopefully we may keep emailing at work n stuff for a while if i dont see her around often. I know alot of people have probably had similar experiences and benefitted. Lee
Sckott Posted February 19, 2005 Posted February 19, 2005 So you've found someone you could be really excited about... I would say the very thing you're worried about is either blowing it or finding she's not interested, yes? There's two long relationships I've been in where the strength of friendship FIRST became a very important thing in creating a relationship. Since this is the very beginning, I would say plan to be a very good friend to her and when the time is open, flirt with her occasionally and let her know what a nice guy you are. If the women at work know you and compliment you on this, they're not lying. Whatever the case, BE YOURSELF!
Author leeutalkin2me Posted February 19, 2005 Author Posted February 19, 2005 Ive liked her for quite a while since she got a job here, never spoke to her most of the time she was here until before she went on her trip to australia. But considering she gives me the time of day and doesnt seem put off talking to me, it kinda makes it both good and bad. Good having opportunity talk to her, bad thinking i couldnt get with her and that she is too pretty n nice for me. Yeah i would worry about blowing it, finding out she aint interested & just not knowing how to act and it just not working. Id say its very early stages of friendship so far. In 23 years ive never had confidence in myself that someone would accept me in that way, or ask someone so i cant see it changing overnight and looks like i will just see how it goes. Probably end up with just another pretty female friend, which aint a bad thing, but still doesnt put me on the next stage Yeah alot of women have complimented me, something in my head struggles to accept it and think someone would actually be interested more than friends, especially the girl at work. Im trying tho, my counsellor stopped in the middle of a discussion and told me all the ways i think and my thoughts etc, and the way i am, are attractive qualities and shedoesnt know why im single. we have never discussed my problems with girls etc , not yet, but i think it will be embarrassing when we do.
Podna Posted February 20, 2005 Posted February 20, 2005 Lee. If you want to catch a fish you have to cast your line. Write that on your mirror so every day when you go shave/brush teeth you will see it and remember it. Make it your motto. IF YOU WANT TO CATCH A FISH YOU HAVE TO CAST YOUR LINE! If you get turned down, it will hut. But just tell yourself, there are lots of fish in the sea and cast again. Just like a fisherman. Fishermen don’t catch a fish every time they cast. They don’t take it personally, they just cast again.
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