lindlom Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 After breaking up with this man and telling everything to a couple of trustworthy people, both their reactions immediately were "sounds very much like a pathological liar and a narcissist to me" and now I see it too. There's just one thing that bothers me because I understand narcissists, after getting dumped, usually don't let go of their victims and start apologizing and promising change. In my case, I was with him when I learned about his other women and lies, he seemed to get somewhat upset and wouldn't say a word, so 10 minutes after finding out I walked out of his house in cold anger. After that it took him three weeks to contact me via sms, just a "sorry" followed by something else. Obviously quite lame so I told him it's no good, he said he doesn't understand what I want. I told him what I think of his actions (not in a sweet manner) and said that I'm still willing to listen but this is no way to apologize for what he'd done. He replied me something that was probably sarcasm as if he was the one who's pride and emotions have been hurt. After that I never heard from him and it's been about 6 weeks now. Do narcs do this?
zen2475 Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 Yes, because you called him on his behavior. He's probably found someone else to be his narcissistic supply for the time being. County your blessings.
loversquarrel Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 No way to tell, there is way little info in your post to determine a person's psychological flaws. For all we know you could be a BPD. More info...
iheartgoodmusic Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 (edited) Wrong thread Edited July 7, 2014 by iheartgoodmusic wrong thread
writergal Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 Yes narcs do that, OP. once you cop on to a narcissist and confront them, their response could be any of the following; the silent treatment, sarcasm, blame, and emotional abuse like trivializing or minimizing your pain or the situation. Basically they try to make you the bad guy so they can avoid any responsibility. But don't expect a narcissist to ever give you a genuine apology. They're not capable. Narcissists *never* take responsibility for their actions. It's your fault or someone else's fault. But never theirs. If you ask a narcissist to take responsibility they'll either completely ignore your request, try to make you feel guilty so you'll back down, rationalize why they did what they did, give you lame excuses, try to shame you, or blatantly lie. Narcissists tell so many lies it's hard to know where the truth begins and ends with them. They lie to manipulate, to get out of taking responsibility for emotional abuse or to influence others. Really, the only time a narcissist tells you the truth is when it serves their higher purpose, not actually because they respect you or want you to forgive them. Here's the thing about narcissists: they are incapable of empathy and truly loving someone. They happen to be Academy award worthy actors/actresses the way they fool their partners into believing they're being loved. A narc's attention is fleeting and always based on conditions that meet THEIR needs only. So selfish. 3
2sunny Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 Be glad you dodged a bullet. Don't bother wasting you breath or energy on him. He's never going to be sorry he did it - only sorry he got caught. Women - plural = lucky you know now. Don't even think of having a conversation with him - he won't blame himself.
Author lindlom Posted July 7, 2014 Author Posted July 7, 2014 No way to tell, there is way little info in your post to determine a person's psychological flaws. For all we know you could be a BPD. More info... I merely wanted to know if letting go of the "victim" this easily is something that somehow excludes the possibility of one being a narc. But yes, I made it quite clear I have no empathy for his actions so I get that if he is one, he wouldn't have the interest to try and BS me anymore when there are others who don't see through it yet. But I sure hope they will. 1
Amy74 Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 Sure they do...my narcissistic ex-bf did it ALL the time--and it used to work too...ugh. THEY can't have YOU leaving...and will do everything they can to get you back. They can't lose. It's all about them and not about you at all....sorry.
geebelle Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 My ex was a narcissist so that sounds about right!!!!!
Recommended Posts