fruitname Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 (edited) Hi! 10 days ago I met an amazing guy on Tinder. We started chatting and the chemistry was good. We met two days later and went for a walk. I had a great time and the next day he asked me to his apartment for dinner. This is not something I usually do but I thought it might be fun. As the night went on we laid in his bed talking, cuddling and kissing. We had oral sex and as everything happend I asked him to take of his pants (so we could have sex). He said he didn't want to have sex already. I'll have to admit it made me a bit sad. Didn't he find me attractive? I might have been bad at hiding my surprised expression. He later told me that he just got out of a four year long relationship a month ago and that the condom might have caused him some problems since he hadn't used one in four years. The night ended okay with a kiss and a hug goodbye. Yesterday I sent him a text thanking for a great night and saying that I was sorry for the way I acted during the "why don't you want to have sex?" moment. He texted back that it did hurt him and wished me a good vacation (I'm on vacation now). What does this mean? Did I blow it? Edited July 6, 2014 by fruitname Spelling
smackie9 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Um no not really I guess, he is just not emotionally ready for a relationship. I don't think you should invest anymore into this guy, because you will be faced with issues like this. Just my suggestion: monogamy before sex. To prevent any complications like this, holding off on the sex will play in your favor. Chatting on line doesn't count as dating. If you spend more time going out and getting to know on another, this will help you gauge if he is willing to fulfill your relationship expectations. Now if you were just looking for something casual, this guy isn't for you. He is too damaged to have "fun" with. It's not your responsibility to "fix" him. Ya it sucks when you hit if off and this is what you get.....the bs comes to the surface. Ditch this guy and keep looking for someone that is trouble free. You don't deserve to deal with someone elses baggage. 1
Author fruitname Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 Thank you for your reply! It was very helpful
smackie9 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Glad I could help fruitmane. I totally understand how difficult it is when meeting men on these dating sites. It's like a crap shoot, you never what you may get. There are so many out there ready to take advantage of nice honest ladies with true intentions like yourself. You really have to protect yourself, and your heart. Best of luck, hope you find someone nice real soon
Author fruitname Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 Exactly! I started using it just for fun but as I met him and we hit it off something told me that it might turn into something more later on. I'll keep on searching! All the best to you! 1
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