Author Omei Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 The part where I said its just a fling and we discussed that there was going to be nothing else involved maybe I should of made that clear, to me a fling is a sexual based relationship with no outcome.
Gaeta Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Well maybe had you had some self control, he would have respected you and sought a relationship. What kind of narrow minded comment is that? Here in Canada we have independent women that own their sexuality and can sleep with anyone they want, as quickly as they want without being seen as 'disrespecting themselves' how American of you to make a comment like this!! Having sex is a 2 way exchange, she gets pleasure, he gets pleasure, end of story. There is no 'putting out' or 'giving up something'. Sex is not something you give to someone, it's something you share together upon agreement. It's a fair trade. 7
Author Omei Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 Were you naive enough to think you didn't want a relationship all along? Didn't think I would end up liking him for real no Look there's no secrect coding in my posts here... I had sex with a guy I didn't think id see again, I ended up liking him, I enjoyed myself no regrets but I ended it because a relationship wasn't going to be taking place had I not liked him as much as I did I would still sleep with him. 1
Els Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 I don't see why you should need to defend your personal decision to have consensual casual sex. Not sure what Strength in Healing is going on about. You also have a right to cut things off if you change your mind, and I'm glad you did. 1
iPhone Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 What kind of narrow minded comment is that? Here in Canada we have independent women that own their sexuality and can sleep with anyone they want, as quickly as they want without being seen as 'disrespecting themselves' how American of you to make a comment like this!! Having sex is a 2 way exchange, she gets pleasure, he gets pleasure, end of story. There is no 'putting out' or 'giving up something'. Sex is not something you give to someone, it's something you share together upon agreement. It's a fair trade. Oh goodness, I would say this is y ur single.
Author Omei Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 I don't see why you should need to defend your personal decision to have consensual casual sex. Not sure what Strength in Healing is going on about. You also have a right to cut things off if you change your mind, and I'm glad you did. He was upset a little that I ended things, he said he saw me as more but didnt want to move too fast "emotionally" and I said that was nice to hear but I didnt want a future relationship built on sex from the start so we both said our byes. He even said if I ever want casual again to call but idk I did actually like him I dont wanna set myself up to be disappointed this way to me it really was a short time together that was nice.
Author Omei Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 Oh goodness, I would say this is y ur single. Shes talking about casual sex Not relationships So why would it have to do with her being single.
SmartDude Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 It *seems* like you have this figured out pretty good. But, you will still be missing out on a summer fling:eek:. It sucks because really great, desirable, attractive single guys are not "allowed" to just have flings with women. Your story is an example of why:laugh:(generalization). But you may be over it now, so a mute point. What is the worst that can happen when its over? A few days of tears, a couple weeks of moodiness? Thats not that bad. Unless he really affected you in a way that was deep and unexpected, that's a different story.
Author Omei Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 It *seems* like you have this figured out pretty good. But, you will still be missing out on a summer fling:eek:. It sucks because really great, desirable, attractive single guys are not "allowed" to just have flings with women. Your story is an example of why:laugh:(generalization). But you may be over it now, so a mute point. What is the worst that can happen when its over? A few days of tears, a couple weeks of moodiness? Thats not that bad. Unless he really affected you in a way that was deep and unexpected, that's a different story. I feel like I would of fallen for him. We had so much in common
Diezel Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 Sex is not something you give to someone, it's something you share together upon agreement. It's a fair trade. I think this is something you need to remind the vast majority of American women, because they value it as currency over here.
HappyLove Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 If you liked him so much and ultimately don't want a relationship started with a fling then why DID you sleep with him so fast? Why not see where it goes first? I think women fool themselves into thinking they can have sex as easily as a man and not catch feelings. Very few women can actually do this. We have a hormone oxytocin that bonds us to our partner. Women have this "cuddle hormone" in a much higher dosage than men.
Author Omei Posted July 9, 2014 Author Posted July 9, 2014 (edited) If you liked him so much and ultimately don't want a relationship started with a fling then why DID you sleep with him so fast? Why not see where it goes first? I think women fool themselves into thinking they can have sex as easily as a man and not catch feelings. Very few women can actually do this. We have a hormone oxytocin that bonds us to our partner. Women have this "cuddle hormone" in a much higher dosage than men. I slept with him so fast because the signs were that it was likely just for the night and for the first time in over a year I found someone actually attractive. If he had said he liked me too and wanted to take it slow and me out on a date after I told him I had liked him yes I would of seen where it went. He didn't want a relationship, right away but told me he saw me as more but didn't want to invest emotionally? I don't wanna keep being with him for a maybe And I have slept with other guys and have not got feelings but this time I truly think he would of been someone id care for obviously since I made a post about him and not other men ive been with that I didn't like. it's over there is nothing left to speak of, anyway I think everything has been completely covered for every question! if anyone wants to know "whys" all they would have to do is re-read cuz im starting to feel like im repeating myself lol Edited July 9, 2014 by Omei
smackie9 Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 If you liked him so much and ultimately don't want a relationship started with a fling then why DID you sleep with him so fast? Why not see where it goes first? I think women fool themselves into thinking they can have sex as easily as a man and not catch feelings. Very few women can actually do this. We have a hormone oxytocin that bonds us to our partner. Women have this "cuddle hormone" in a much higher dosage than men. There are men that are just as sensitive as women. It's personality that will dictate how one will view sex. I myself had np having casual sex without "catching feelings" and I know several other women, at different times in their life that didn't "catch feelings", but had to shake the guy off their leg. There are women that know the the difference between love and sex, and don't need love to have sex.
FitChick Posted July 9, 2014 Posted July 9, 2014 For women who have no idea if they would become attached to a ONS or not, I'd suggest having an affair on a vacation far away from where you live. You will never see each other again so he can remain a romantic memory.
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