ktya Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 To the OPs title question... Within the first five minutes. Girls know if they would sleep with you in seconds. Dilly dally too long and even if they would have slept with you you might end up in the friendzone. I met this 19 year old and im 37 and i told her i liked her and thought she was cute and got her number in 5 minutes. Kissed her a half hour later. Im not mr. Roid monkey just average not even tall, im 5'6". Banged her thursday night and she wanted to be FBs she made the ask on me. If your looking for LTR you might want to wait, but only long enough to determine her suitability. Women all have many suitors and it does not pay to beat around the bush, you can lose them with those silly mind games.
JimmyB26 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 OP do not confuse the advice of many of the posters on this thread with PUA methods. PUAs are very good at getting women into bed, but in maintaining attraction and forming a sustainable relationship they lack real skills. All of the advice that is being offered to you is really towards the end of trying to encourage you to go after what you want without fear of the outcome and without caring what she thinks of you. You can't live your life in fear. Attraction is not a choice. Either it was always there or it never was. A woman will know if she wants to sleep with you within seconds. Most guys, however, wind up talking women right out of liking them. Sit with the advice you've gotten and just think about what you want for your life. You can have it but you need to be willing to risk loss to gain reward. 1
guest569 Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 If someone told me they like me within 5 minutes of "knowing" me, I wouldn't consider that to be very genuine. Sure its a compliment but we are strangers.
Author ChessPieceFace Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 Wow, here comes the PUA bully squad, chomping at the bit to attack me for daring to highlight the emptiness of their lifestyle. I don't care about your personal attacks. I don't care how many sluts you've banged. You're nothing like me, get out of my thread because your advice has nothing to do with me. Go ejaculate into whatever convenient female orifice presents itself to you instead of posting in my thread any further -- get out. There's nothing your penis can accomplish here. I do not respect you for how many holes you've inseminated. Only animals respect that.
Author ChessPieceFace Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 --- To the actual human beings posting in my thread: --- Went out tonight and ran into some of her old friends, kind of got more perspective on things, and I think I need to reassess a lot of things. Not sending any message tonight. Mo_Do, enigma - I've always thought that too, but I think it's too simplistic to be a universal rule. I know for a fact that several LTRs started with the guy professing genuine feelings for a girl, they saw it as romantic (and they undoubtedly reciprocated) and then like to talk about how romantic he was on their first date. PUA players can't seem to comprehend anything like genuine romance, genuine feelings being expressed or really anything other than finding orifices to insert their penises into, so this possibility is beyond them. joeLove - I have tried to get her involved in things in the past, but again it was never and could never be a legitimate date, because of mutual friends / my family ALWAYS being involved. The results were... underwhelming. smiley1 - Exactly - how much can you like someone in 5 minutes? There's not a great deal to ruin and even if I went down in flames, 6 months from now it would be basically the same as it is now. I've already "sort of" asked her out and "sort of" been rejected. Maybe. Sometimes I think the entire thing is stupid. But then I see her again and it just wrecks something inside of me whenever I have to say goodbye and probably not see her again for months. There was actually an activity we were both supposed to go to; it was going to be a group activity. I asked people to go, she signed on right away, but then it ended up being just us two going. She was supposedly still down for it to happen. But then supposedly at the very last minute she wasn't able to go. However, that was when she had a boyfriend. So among the many possible reasons (whether she genuinely just had to cancel at the last minute, or whether that was a cover) was that she just didn't want to have a pseudo-date with me when she had a BF. Anyway, I'm thinking what I will do (whatever I do or don't decide to tell her about how I feel about her) is to ask her to this activity we missed out on, and that it will be a date. If she declines then that's that. 1
iiiii Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 smiley1 - Exactly - how much can you like someone in 5 minutes? There's not a great deal to ruin and even if I went down in flames, 6 months from now it would be basically the same as it is now. I've already "sort of" asked her out and "sort of" been rejected. Maybe. Sometimes I think the entire thing is stupid. But then I see her again and it just wrecks something inside of me whenever I have to say goodbye and probably not see her again for months. You usually feel chemistry (or not) within 5 minutes, I think. Getting to know someone over a long period, and then starting to feel chemistry for them, is rarer. It does happen - I know, because I'm 18 months into a relationship that started as (genuine) friends. But having attraction grow is less common than immediately feeling the chemistry. All you can do is ask her. Otherwise you'll never know.
gaius Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Chess, it's better to funnel that energy into wooing her to go out with you. Being funny, charming, persistent. Telling her outloud you like her a lot when you're not even dating is just throwing the ball into her court and I know you don't want to hear it but women really don't like that. It's a form of self sabotage for a guy. A defense mechanism to ward off intimacy almost. 1
MoreCoffee Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 Wow, here comes the PUA bully squad, chomping at the bit to attack me for daring to highlight the emptiness of their lifestyle. I don't care about your personal attacks. I don't care how many sluts you've banged. You're nothing like me, get out of my thread because your advice has nothing to do with me. Go ejaculate into whatever convenient female orifice presents itself to you instead of posting in my thread any further -- get out. There's nothing your penis can accomplish here. I do not respect you for how many holes you've inseminated. Only animals respect that. Really? And I thought I was too passive agressive. You win.
d0nnivain Posted July 6, 2014 Posted July 6, 2014 In actuality, this is why divorce/break-ups is so prevalent these days. Lack of communication The advice given is contrary to what is attributed to an actual healthy relationship. Inside of a relationship, it's wonderful & healthy to tell somebody you like them. To make such an announcement to somebody you are not dating is weird, creepy & off putting. My advice, therefore, was for the OP to ask the woman on an actual date -- where there is no confusion that it's a date -- then talk to her. In any other context -- or doing it backwards -- announcing that you like somebody is a mistake.
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