chelsiethe Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 I won't go into detail about the relationship, all I can say is that he's not the person I thought he was which is really sad, and that I want to take the steps forward now to make myself happy again. I decided around a month ago that I was completely done with being treated horribly in my relationship and done with being treated horribly whilst it was ending. I've been in no contact with him for a month tomorrow (he's spoken to me through friends and quite childishly but I haven't attempted to talk to him either)... The problem is that my self esteem is now non exsistent. I feel like this relationship has just affected me in that I feel like I'm not good enough, even though it's based on the actions of just one person. I feel like I'm lost and I can't remember who I was before the relationship which is really sad. Any help or inspiring words for someone who has taken the step to move on/want to move on from someone who's changed and treats me badly but then I'm sometimes dragged down by thinking of happy memories etc? Any help and I would be very very grateful:) 1
me85 Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 (edited) I know just how you feel. My ex was the best and worst boyfriend I ever had, but he was mostly just bad to me. He completely destroyed my self esteem. The past 3 years of my life have been ruined by him. It's been a complete waste of my time. I'll never understand how he could do the things he's done to me and not even care. I'm going to need a lot of counseling, that's for sure. I've had a very hard life and he certainly did not make it any better. Even when he did, he didn't. He was very controlling, abusive, jealous, disloyal, the list goes on and on. BUT with all his flaws he was the best friend I ever had and showed me so much love and attention. There was a time when he was prince charming. I have no idea who my ex is now. I started feeling like I didn't know him anymore - longer than a year ago. The guy I fell so hard for just disappeared on me. He changed for the worst. He turned into someone I no longer respect or like. I've learned to not make him the center of my universe. That I am queen and he USED to be king but now I rule my universe alone again. I've survived a lot. I will get through this like I get through everything but I am forever changed by the RS I had with my ex. All the good, all the bad...it has definitely left it's mark on me. I too, feel very lost. Edited July 3, 2014 by me85
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