turnerik Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 I guess we will break this down into 3 parts. Me, girl a, girl b. Me: 21 year old male, live on my own, college degree. I'm very mature for my age, still say yes sir, yes ma'am, I hold open doors, work a full time job. I have a hard time talking to girls, or at least i think I do. I know that when I fall, I fall hard. Girl A: I've known her for about 10 months, we met in college. She's 35 years old divorced with 3 kids, her ex husband abused her. She drives me insane, she always says she will call and never does, she just randomly stops texting me. She knows how i feel, kinda but said she won't date anyone for another year. I went with her and her friend to a concert tonight and had a great time. We are very flirtatious with each other ( when i opened the door for her tonight she screamed so everyone could hear I can't wait tot get you home) she drives me nuts, but I'm crazy for her. I honestly think she is the most sexy woman in the world. We have a lot in common,,and when we do get to talk, we just have a great time. Girl B: she's 26 I just met her about a month ago. She is my best friends roommate( they are just friends, nothing between them at all) I asked her out and she said she would think about. Well she never brought it up,so I left it. She came to every softball game since then, and I've been to one of hers. Then one night I was supposed to go over to her apartment to help my friend fix his financial problems. She called and asked if I wanted to go out for ice cream, so we went out and talked, we talked about 401ks and stocks and credit(boring to most, yet it was amazing to have a conversation about this stuff with someone close to my age. So she sounds great for me, but here is where it turns bad. She been married and divorced, had 3 miscarriages. My best friend says I shouldn't date her because she is crazy, and like to stat drama. She's sorta (her words) in a relationship with a guy who is in a work release program for selling drugs. She also has said she doesn't want a relationship right now because she needs to focus on her career. I told her straight up if she isn't interested in me just tell me, but she didn't say that to me. I don't really know what to do. Ive fallen for both these girls who I know who are wrong for me, but the heart wants what the heart wants. I've been crazy for the 35 year old since about December. The other girl for a few weeks. I usually go to bed at 8pm, it's now 3 in the morning. I had to call in sick to my job that I just started because there is no way I can make it through work. What's a guy to do?
PegNosePete Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 I don't really know what to do. Ive fallen for both these girls who I know who are wrong for me, but the heart wants what the heart wants. The heart wants what the heart wants, but the brain should tell the heart to be sensible. Neither of these woman are suitable relationship material. Sure have a bit of fun if you like, you're young. But you know you're setting yourself up for major hurt if you allow yourself to become emotionally involved with either of these woman. If that's already happened/happening then you'd be wise to withdraw now. It will hurt less in the long run. 2
StumpyNB Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 There is clearly only one solution to this situation, since neither is a good long-term keeper. Invite them both over for a threesome and see what happens. Make sure to post up here if it works...
GoBlue Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 I don't really know what to do. Ive fallen for both these girls who I know who are wrong for me, but the heart wants what the heart wants. I've been crazy for the 35 year old since about December. The other girl for a few weeks. I usually go to bed at 8pm, it's now 3 in the morning. I had to call in sick to my job that I just started because there is no way I can make it through work. What's a guy to do? Well, a guy is supposed to use his head to do what he knows is right. You are 21 and you believe you can have a meaningful and committed relationship with a 35 y/o divorced mother of 3? What do you have in common besides mutual attraction and hormones? You may be mature for a 21 y/o male but that kind of difference is huge. She doesn't stay in contact with you regularly for a reason - read between the lines. I have also learned something else as a 49 y/o man, listen to your family and friends when they have reservations about a possible girlfriend. They love and care for you in a way that your heart (errr, hormones) cannot care for itself. You are young, you have a good head on your shoulders, and you already have a solid foundation to build for the future. Make good and wise choices and you won't have much to regret. Hope this is a help! Blessings.
Assasda Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 You sound like youre stuck firmly in the friendzone with both of them. You should move on and date other women bro. These women wil still be around, but you should experience other women. I think you have a lot of love to give, and these women are not receptive right now
Baller25 Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 When your bro says that a girl is crazy then you need to steer clear of her, she's CRAZY. Also I don't think you're as mature are you think because you haven't realised that they are both very damaged goods.
haribogumsnickers Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 You're falling for the idea of falling. Are you looking for something long term with either of these two women? Or, is this just something for now? Girl A. is a mother and you're wondering why she goes radio silent thru text. She makes you go crazy yet you still think there's hope for something when there's really nothing. Girl B. is not ready for a relationship and you're discouraged from her divorce and miscarriages. You say they're wrong for you but maybe you're the one that's wrong for them. Figure out what you really want because it seems like you're just falling for these two women because they're the only two giving you attention.
Cali408 Posted July 14, 2014 Posted July 14, 2014 A flake and another flake. It's your brain chemistry, both are disasters. Run as fast as you can from both. You're a boy toy to the 35 year old and the other one is taken. Please clean the slate and find a girl more age appropriate. Both have way too much baggage for a 21 year old man.
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