Author dunkindoughnuts Posted July 3, 2014 Author Posted July 3, 2014 Well, if you are not willing to make changes that you clearly know you need to make, then you'll always have problems dating whether you're in your 20s or older. Have fun and do so w/o a gf if that's what you truly want. To do that is easy. I didn't mean to make it seem like I placed my self worth in others but I'm just tired of the pain, restless nights and drama associated with dating. I'm not making anymore changes because I think I'm fine the way I am. If I can make friends easily and if people in general seem to think I'm a good guy then there's no to make a change.
Author dunkindoughnuts Posted July 3, 2014 Author Posted July 3, 2014 Whatever changes you make, do it for yourself. You can't place your sense of selfworth in the hands of other people. Improve yourself for yourself, and the women who are right for you will be naturally attracted. Then dating will be easier. Maybe you'll be going out with less girls, but all dates will be worth it. This is my experience at least. I am 26, and I used to feel the same way you do. I didn't mean to make it seem like I placed my self worth in others but I'm just tired of the pain, restless nights and drama associated with dating. I'm not making anymore changes because I think I'm fine the way I am. If I can make friends easily and if people in general seem to think I'm a good guy then there's no to make a change.
Kid_Charlemange Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 going through like 12 girls just to get one that likes me and then I end up ****ing it up. I hate to tell you this, but that's a really low number. I've dated that many new women this year, and only met one that I'd even consider having a LTR with.
Kid_Charlemange Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 The best man in my eyes is the omega male. Look it up. Alpha males are often arrogant manipulative and abusive. I had to look it up. I guess I'm an Omega Male, specifically the first one listed in this article: Why omega males are cropping up in TV and movies like Greenberg. Who knew?
Gaeta Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 omega male The polar opposite of the Alpha Male. Omega Males can have friends and close acquaintances but prefer to accomplish things on their own without the help of a group. Omega Males generally don't belong to any cliques and have no desire to be the leader or most outstanding of said clique. Omega Males have relations with people from all groups and carry a resourcefulness and cunning (sometimes strength) to get a job done with their own skill. This being said, an omega male can have great pride without it manifesting as "ego." (There are always exceptions. An Alpha Male MUST absolutely be perceived by his peers as the toughest, most popular, and smartest. An Omega Male cares little for this recognition...but knows that he is all those things and more. Alpha males must have the support of his "boys." This can be the foundation for many shallow and superficial relationships. An Omega Male needs support from time to time, but has few true friends who know him intimately and generally shuns shallow acquaintances.
kolleamm Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 **** that dude, if I can't get the ones I want then there's no point. It's easier for some and harder for some and if it's harder for me then **** it I honestly don't care how hard it is for me or anyone else, as long as it's not impossible I'll do it. You know the saying from rags to riches. And you can't just give up on women. That's practically impossible, unless you want to enter a downward spiral of depression and misery for the rest of your life. There is hope, there is always hope. Assuming you don't have a perfect body I say get to it.
soccerrprp Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 I didn't mean to make it seem like I placed my self worth in others but I'm just tired of the pain, restless nights and drama associated with dating. I'm not making anymore changes because I think I'm fine the way I am. If I can make friends easily and if people in general seem to think I'm a good guy then there's no to make a change. Fair enough. But when you decide to date again, you cannot ignore what you may NEED to change. Really, not everyone has to change much or at all. I've tried to be who I am and that's been enough to meet some great women and be engaged with one. Now, as the relationship further develops and we learn more about each other, there will be some necessary compromises or changes. Anyway, if you are just fine who you are, then it's not you. Again, you are the common denominator in this. The women you date must be young. Teens? 20s?
SJC2008 Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 I don't habe the self esteem to go through 12 women to find one who likes me. That's roughly my ratio too. I'm 32 and since Since my first gf at 17 there have been 3 girls who really liked me, that I was aware of. One I didn't like one I ran from and the last one friend zoned me, then changed her mind and we decided to meet again but I backed out. I take responsibility for running from the second one but other than that, every other woman has flaked after our first date. So I look at myself and try to think why. Mabye I'm too nervous, mabye I don't give off enough masculine energy who knows. But you can only look at yourself so much before it makes you more insecure which I am. I am so insecure I barely have the balls to say good morning to people at work at my new job. They probably think I'm a snob or can see right through me. I'm so depressed and insecure I can't even make small talk, not that I was the greatest at it but it leads me to my next point. I like some small talk here and there but it seems like most people do it not to sit in silence. What's wrong with silence every niw and then? When people aren't on the phone or working on something it's right back to convo/small talk. I came to the point where I even thought I might be an aspie but I'm not. I read body language perfect. I guess I'm just an outlier. I'm not a genius but I like to talk about current affairs and other things I'm interested. I have no idea why and hiw people can babble on about pointless bs like what route you take to work or whatever. I don't knkw anymore. Holefully things get better when I get my own place in a couple months. Sorry for thread jacking op.
R3d Posted July 4, 2014 Posted July 4, 2014 Did you date 12 girls or ask 12 out, date them, and then strike out?
Author dunkindoughnuts Posted July 4, 2014 Author Posted July 4, 2014 Fair enough. But when you decide to date again, you cannot ignore what you may NEED to change. Really, not everyone has to change much or at all. I've tried to be who I am and that's been enough to meet some great women and be engaged with one. Now, as the relationship further develops and we learn more about each other, there will be some necessary compromises or changes. Anyway, if you are just fine who you are, then it's not you. Again, you are the common denominator in this. The women you date must be young. Teens? 20s? Yea usually my age or younger (im 22). They only thing that will change is my body.
Author dunkindoughnuts Posted July 4, 2014 Author Posted July 4, 2014 I honestly don't care how hard it is for me or anyone else, as long as it's not impossible I'll do it. You know the saying from rags to riches. And you can't just give up on women. That's practically impossible, unless you want to enter a downward spiral of depression and misery for the rest of your life. There is hope, there is always hope. Assuming you don't have a perfect body I say get to it. I probably will dude at this rate. Hope doesn't mean **** to me. I need certainty, hope will get you killed
soccerrprp Posted July 4, 2014 Posted July 4, 2014 Yea usually my age or younger (im 22). They only thing that will change is my body. Since you've given up for now, whatever you do, don't let yourself go physically or take this time to improve it for you. The 20s are the toughest times to date. This seems to be the time when people begin to get jaded, used, thrown-away, etc. b/c everyone is more selfish, feeling invincible and thinking the world is their oyster w/o regard to others. Not everyone mind you. 1
Author dunkindoughnuts Posted July 4, 2014 Author Posted July 4, 2014 Yea usually my age or younger (im 22). They only thing that will change is my body. Hobbies not body sorry
Author dunkindoughnuts Posted July 4, 2014 Author Posted July 4, 2014 I probably will dude at this rate. Hope doesn't mean **** to me. I need certainty, hope will get you killed The only thing in life that is certain is death.
Lipitor11 Posted July 4, 2014 Posted July 4, 2014 Maybe its the best to chill out for awhile. Dating sucks. Keep yourself occupied with work, friends, hobbies and you never know-you might meet that special girl when you least expect it.
Glinda.Good Posted July 4, 2014 Posted July 4, 2014 you will never make any man happy and that they would rather have trash women. Is this the female counterpart to the masses of men who complain that women only want to date "bad boys"? I don't think the OP is functioning under that misconception, thank goodness. OP, don't sweat it very much. Your perspective will change, probably soon. Living your life and enjoying it is key.
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