Author enchanted771 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Posted July 3, 2014 Well then it's not really about your birthday isn't it. this is just the icing on the cake and the deal breaker. He never forgot me on holidays. And when were together he's always making our relationship out to seem like it's more than it is. He is always telling me how he cares and bla bla bla but this tells that was nothing but a bunch if bs.
Author enchanted771 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Posted July 3, 2014 The only two options that I can see: Either you get over it - this is a casual relationship, which by most people's definitions means he has no obligation to remember your birthday, and has done nothing wrong, and doesn't deserve to be punished. Or if you want this to be more than a casual relationship, then you'll have to have a mature, adult conversation about it, and see what he wants. Ignoring him or sulking because he doesn't magically understand that you suddenly want to be treated like a girlfriend is not a good relationship strategy. I'll be mature about it and I won't flip out but I really don't Want to hear how much he cares about me and bla bla bla. He texts me on every holiday even Mother's Day. I'll have my say with him, and then I'll move on. He gives me mixed signals all the time.
Fondue Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 He has asked over the course of a month if I'm excited about my bday. I said no not really. Then he calls me to let me know he's going away. I said wait your not going to be here for my birthday? He says oh stop I always take you out For dinner, etc. That's fine his birthday is coming up soon so I'll extend the same courtesy. Since it's no big deal neither is his. And he better not even try to see me around that week either. Not happening. Fair is fair Read the bolded. If you specifically told him you don't care about your birthday, why should he? Ask yourself that question. Then ask it again. Now do you see how you might have over reacted? Besides, you keep mentioning this is "casual." What do you expect? I think you're over-exaggerating. You say that this relationship isn't worth much to you, you told him that your birthday is insignificant, but then you get pissy when he doesn't go out of his way to make a grand gesture? Please. 2
Author enchanted771 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Posted July 3, 2014 Actually when he said he was going away I told Him how upset I was that we wouldn't spend my birthday Together. He knew. He's just selfish. I don't expect a " grand" gesture. A simple 5 second text would have been fine.
Diezel Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 He has asked over the course of a month if I'm excited about my bday. I said no not really. And /thread. Stop playing mind games and acting coy.
Zahara Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 OP, this isn't about your birthday. If you want to establish something more with this guy and make your expectations known, then communicate that with him. You'll then know where you stand in his life. Mother's day and Holidays are easy. It's one every TV set, paper, radio ad, etc. It's blaring everywhere for weeks. Don't compare your birthday that is personal and special to you alone to a public holiday. If he's not remembering your birthday or not acknowledging it, then it's pretty evident that he's treating you as a casual person in his life -- as how you've defined yourself in this relationship with him. You can't have these expectations when you've set yourself up for being a woman that he sees for pleasure. If you want someone to take note, pay attention, make the effort to treat you special, find a man that wants to give you a relationship with commitment and love. 1
Author enchanted771 Posted July 3, 2014 Author Posted July 3, 2014 Yes your right. He did apologize with some lame Work excuse as usual, but it's what I was expecting. Said happy belated.,I'll say Thanks and leave it alone. Now I know not to have any expectations. I know how a man acts when he's into me and He clearly isn't. It's stupid to give him too much space In my head and a priority when I'm just an option. Moving forward
Keenly Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 Make sure in your next relationship you employ better communication. 1
Gaeta Posted July 3, 2014 Posted July 3, 2014 Now I know not to have any expectations. I know how a man acts when he's into me and He clearly isn't. It's stupid to give him too much space In my head and a priority when I'm just an option. Moving forward Finally you have reached your breaking point. It's not like it's a total surprise to you right? You've got multiple threads about him not wanting to commit. 1
Author enchanted771 Posted July 6, 2014 Author Posted July 6, 2014 Finally you have reached your breaking point. It's not like it's a total surprise to you right? You've got multiple threads about him not wanting to commit. not surprised just the way he was behaving when he was with me made me feel like he wanted more. But I won't be fooled again.
Recommended Posts