RonaldS Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 She likes you but doesn't like your behaviors. She is also afraid of dating you because if it doesn't work out she still has to live near you & will be able to see your comings & goings, including any new GFs. She is also afraid that she's the rebound & then we come back to the proximity again. For some people like me, drugs are a deal breaker, no matter how infrequent your use. It may be that way for her. If you quit she may change her mind but you have to want to quit not just for her. All drugs? How about drinking? The reason I ask is because obviously this guy likes to blaze, and pot is considered a narcotic in the states. BUT....as you're seeing, it's slowly becoming legal. In states like Colorado, it is legal. I just wonder, because drinking is rarely a deal-breaker, even for those who don't drink themselves. So, what is it about pot that's a deal-breaker? The illegality of it? Because in a net sense, puffing here and there is really no different than drinking here and there. I'm not judging or attacking you at all. I'm just honestly curious. We are going to see a day in the not-too-distant future here in the US where marijuana is legal. Will people still categorize it equally with meth, heroin, etc? When you meet somebody who smokes a little when it's a legal thing to do, is it still a dating deal-breaker? And how would it be different than somebody who drinks?
d0nnivain Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 For me its the illegality. I also don't particularly care for smoke, period. I avoid smokers too. I have learned not to date them because I'm such a B!tch about it that I end up ruining the relationship. It's no fun to be a big nag.
Author BroknHrt Posted July 7, 2014 Author Posted July 7, 2014 Oops. Didn't see the update. First of all....why on Earth did you tell her you liked her?! Bad move, guy. You had her. You were sitting at the table with a full house, aces over kings. She had a pair of 2s. Then she went all-in, and then SHOWED you her cards, and then you folded! What?! Now it's back to even. Don't worry, you're not out. I would just 98% ignore her for a little while. I did not know what to do as I've never been in this situation b4.
BlueIris Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 I did not know what to do as I've never been in this situation b4. Oh well. Live and learn. This girl is a manipulator, a game player, and that is a personality trait that wouldn't go away if you dated her. Game players just think that way and you're lucky you haven't encountered it before. It's even better that you're going to avoid her.
d0nnivain Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 I did not know what to do as I've never been in this situation b4. What do you want to do? If you want to date her, sit her down in person & address her issues.
Author BroknHrt Posted July 7, 2014 Author Posted July 7, 2014 But would trying to sit down with her and address her issues be the best decision? I feel as if that's a bad idea and not attempting to talk to her (she doesn't attempt with me either) would be best.
CarrieT Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 Well, what IS the neighbor situation; i.e., something you can change? How do you feel about her 420 comment? Is it something you would cease? And you've been out of the relationship that caused you heartbreak for a while. Personally, she has already told you that she wouldn't go out with you so I would suggest a 180. Change those things that she is concerned about and wait several more months THEN ask her out again.
Diezel Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 What do you want to do? If you want to date her, sit her down in person & address her issues. That ship sailed as soon as he told her that he liked her and she went and danced with someone else, seconds later. She's been disqualifying him from Day 1.
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