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Polite way to decline a date invitation from a coworker?


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savethedrama4allama
Posted

I had a boyfriend for the longest time, and I'm the type that when I have a boyfriend everyone knows it because he's always out with me. So now that he's gone people have noticed and I'm getting asked out. One particular coworker of mine asked me if I'd like to go on a date sometime. I'm not interested for a number of reasons, but do you guys think a polite way is just to say that I don't date coworkers and leave it at that? The issue is that we don't work anywhere near each other or with eachother for any reason, so it might seem like a lame cop-out.

 

Any better ideas?

Posted

That sounds so much similar to my situation with Lindsay. She wasnt upfront and agreed on a date at first then I guess she was hoping Id take the hint but didnt. If you dont want to go out with him then tell him upfront cause us guys get hurt when gals blow us off. Maybe you should go out with him before you judge him. Btw your a pretty looking girl so it's common for guys to ask you out.

Posted

Uh oh....llama mamma's having drama!

 

No, I think that saying that you have a strict, "I don't date co workers" policy is a great idea. I mean, what if you would have a horrible break up, and then you'd see him every day. Or, if he looooooooooved you, he'd be hanging around you all the time.

 

No, not dating co workers is a really really good rule. And that is a fine 'cop out' :cool: but be nice about it.

 

Or, check your employee manual...most companies have a rule against dating co workers. :D

Posted

I agree with Monday.

 

Just say I don't date co-workers and leave it at that. Never divulge all your reasons, let him fill in the blanks. And yes, most companies have strict rules regarding fraternizing with co-workers. It doesn't seem to stop most people, but it's usually a good idea to avoid that potential complication.

Posted

i agree with monday. make sure it is not against policy.

 

and if you do not want to date him, just say no thanks.

 

it is not his businss why, and if he presses the issue just spit on him :sick: , then rotate your head exocist-style :sick: and demonically say " I SAID NOOOOOO!" :sick:

Posted
Originally posted by tattoomytoe

i agree with monday. make sure it is not against policy.

 

and if you do not want to date him, just say no thanks.

 

it is not his businss why, and if he presses the issue just spit on him :sick: , then rotate your head exocist-style :sick: and demonically say " I SAID NOOOOOO!" :sick:

 

:laugh:

 

Or you could cop a really whiny voice and say "Just do what I say, gosh!"

Posted

Tell him you've turned lesbian.

 

Haha, no, just tell him that you don't date coworkers. You don't owe him any more of an excuse than that!

savethedrama4allama
Posted

I wonder if llamas can purse their lips like Napoleon Dynamite and say "godddd, you're such an iiiidiot."

 

Yeah, I'm just used to having a bf and don't know how to handle this stuff anymore. Thank you everyone, you're a big help.

Posted
Originally posted by tiki

Tell him you've turned lesbian.

 

Haha, no, just tell him that you don't date coworkers. You don't owe him any more of an excuse than that!

 

The girl I asked out agreed to a date with me and kept me hanging for over a month. Please dont hurt this guy.

savethedrama4allama
Posted

MG, I'm sure he won't be too broken hearted. :laugh:

Posted
Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama

MG, I'm sure he won't be too broken hearted. :laugh:

 

If he is you can settle it mano e mano, with an arm wrestling contest.

Posted
Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama

Any better ideas?

 

just say you are taking a "break" from dating right now

Posted
Originally posted by alphamale

just say you are taking a "break" from dating right now

 

That might be a better one. When I talked to Lin last week she told me "she doesnt date"

savethedrama4allama
Posted

How about if I just bust him one in the jaw. Right, BO? :laugh:

Posted

I'd say that I just got out of a relationship and am not ready to date just yet, especially since you don't have too much contact with him at work so that might sound like a bad excuse... He might take it literally and try to persuade you that it is ok to date even though you work together, not knowing that you are not really interested being the real reason...

Posted
Originally posted by Monday

Or, check your employee manual...most companies have a rule against dating co workers. :D

 

this rule is almost non-enforceable.

Posted
Originally posted by Midwest guy

The girl I asked out agreed to a date with me and kept me hanging for over a month. Please dont hurt this guy.

 

Haven't we already established that you're the stalker-obsessive type with a side of the creeps?

 

Most people don't hang on like you do. They accept rejection and go on.

Posted
Originally posted by tiki

 

 

Haven't we already established that you're the stalker-obsessive type with a side of the creeps?

 

Most people don't hang on like you do. They accept rejection and go on.

 

AMEN!

Posted

Everyone has given you really good advice...as the majority says...tell him straight out that you're not interested in dating co-workers or that you just got out of a long relationship and that you're really not looking to go out with anyone right now. :) And hopefully he won't keep pursuing you...guys who can't take a hint are so creepy! Who wants to have to be rude and say "dude I'm sooooooooooo NOT into you" :confused:

Posted

llama~ he does not need to know why you say no.

Posted
Originally posted by alphamale

this rule is almost non-enforceable.

 

I heard about this new thing where you can sue for sexual harrassment if you're "exposed" to the antics of co-workers who are involved, IE you catch then f*cking in the bathroom or something like that. I dunno where i hear that. I am deliriously tired right now.

 

Who stole my iced tea?

Posted

Saying you don't date people from work is fine, but you don't want to give him the idea that you would date him if he wasn't from work, then he might keep bothering you about it. If you tell him you don't date people from work I would try to avoid talking to him afterwards if you act flirty with him or too friendly, that could give him mixed signals and he might keep trying to get you to go out with him.

Posted
Originally posted by Hund1976

Saying you don't date people from work is fine, but you don't want to give him the idea that you would date him if he wasn't from work, then he might keep bothering you about it. If you tell him you don't date people from work I would try to avoid talking to him afterwards if you act flirty with him or too friendly, that could give him mixed signals and he might keep trying to get you to go out with him.

 

I hate blow offs and mixed signals. It hurt me more she wasnt upfront with me. Angry I am. :(:( Like me I got the courage to ask a pretty person out and who is polite too and it blew up right in my face.

Posted
It hurt me more she wasnt upfront with me. Angry I am. Like me I got the courage to ask a pretty person out and who is polite too and it blew up right in my face.

Midwest guy - just look at it in a positive light - she liked and cared about you too much to want to hurt your feelings by saying no straight out to you. Even though you still ended up getting hurt, at least you know that she didn't want you to. If she didn't care, she would've said "no" straight out without caring how it would make you feel.

Posted
Originally posted by Monday

I think that saying that you have a strict, "I don't date co workers" policy is a great idea.

 

I had a crush on a co worker where I used to work a couple of years ago. I asked him out and he said that he didn't like to date anyone at work. I accepted it.

 

Then I find out a couple of weeks later he is going out from someone in the same workplace he had a crush on. Was pretty jealous of that girl at the time. Lol. At first I was a bit annoyed that he lied to me. Then thought well at least he was being sweet by considering my feelings.

 

I was still a little hurt he chose someone else but got over it and moved on.

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