Mark1 Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 We're chatting online, and she keeps telling me how handsome I am. I ask her out, and she agrees. in her previous messages, she mentioned to me that she got kicked out of a strip club for slapping one of the dancers on the ass. Her: "Lunch sounds great!" Me: "Awesome. Btw, I want to hear the story of you getting kicked out of the strip club for slapping the stripper when we meet." Her: "Oooh that might take longer than just lunch" Me: "Then invite me over afterwards. Maybe we can re-enact it" Her: "Well, you give it some thought and let me know when and what you would like to do. I'm going to get my beauty sleep. Sweet dreams!" She didn't deny "re-enacting" the stripper thing, and let me pick what we do.
CarrieT Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 What is there to decode? Go to lunch and play it from there.
Assasda Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 Its like youre too used to being turned down. Calm your ass down man. Dont be a wuss when you go to lunch with her
GemmaUK Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 She completely ignored when you suggested a re-enactment and also your suggestion of going back to her place. Many women do that on OLD as soon as a guy starts talking sex. It's the easiest way to drop the subject. If she were a cougar I would think she would have been happy to talk about it.
d0nnivain Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 She's OK with flirting with you to a point. She is drawing lines in the sand. When she wants to re-enact this, she'll let you know. Until then, concentrate on getting to know her as a person rather than focusing on what sexual fantasies of yours she can fulfill.
firmness Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 Men make this sort of mistake all the time - going for the sex angle a bit too aggressively. She handled it well though. A younger woman might have run away yelling "Ew, yucky man" and been on here telling everyone how creepy you are for saying this. I do not think it is creepy - it is playful. But you should know by now that this is a risky thing to "say". You might have responded like this: " 'Longer than lunch...' Hmmm - I am going to need details. Let's talk at lunch about how to make that happen." 1
Michelle ma Belle Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 First, as a mature woman who enjoys dating younger men, I take offense to the "cougar" label. Makes us sound desperate and predatory and on a singular mission to hunt some young c*ck which isn't necessarily the case. Second, I'm not sure what you need decoded. It seems pretty obvious to me. She enjoys flirting with you and agreed to a date but you're comment about "re-enacting" felt rather inappropriate and sexually aggressive for not having established any kind of connection with this woman. I think she handled it well and it's definitely something I've been known to do with men who get too carried away too soon. My advice to you? As someone whose dated younger men, keep yourself in check and act like a gentleman. Again, not ALL "cougars" are an easy lay or up for NSA joyrides. If that's all YOU want then I suggest you let her know it ASAP and see if you're both on the same page. If you want more than just a hot f*ck with an older woman then tread carefully. Your eagerness could blow up in your face. 2
firmness Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 ...I take offense to the "cougar" label. Makes us sound desperate and predatory I agree. I always wondered why women would refer to themselves as an animal. Let's be fair though, this is a woman's label that men have just adopted. I cringe every time a man says "Hey, I am just a man...men are pigs *wink wink*." That is just f-ing annoying. I am no animal so speak for yourself good ball. If you want more than just a hot f*ck with an older woman then tread carefully. Your eagerness could blow up in your face. I am intrigued by this Michelle. Why would eagerness blow up in OP's face if he wants more than a hot f*ck? I sense a contradiction there. 1
Michelle ma Belle Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 I am intrigued by this Michelle. Why would eagerness blow up in OP's face if he wants more than a hot f*ck? I sense a contradiction there. If he wants MORE than a hot f*ck. Being eager is fine and part of what makes young men exciting for us older women but those of us looking for a bit more than just a NSA f*ck, being overly aggressive sexually may turn off a woman of substance. I'm just saying that if he really likes her and wants to spend more time with her or wants to establish something more than just a sexual tryst then he may need to pace himself or better yet, let the woman set the pace. 1
firmness Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 If he wants MORE than a hot f*ck. Being eager is fine and part of what makes young men exciting for us older women but those of us looking for a bit more than just a NSA f*ck, being overly aggressive sexually may turn off a woman of substance. I'm just saying that if he really likes her and wants to spend more time with her or wants to establish something more than just a sexual tryst then he may need to pace himself or better yet, let the woman set the pace. Ah. I see. I read your original comment as "If he wants something meaningful, a cougar will disappoint him because she just wants sex" I disagree about letting the woman set the pace. When I was 18 I "dated" a 30 year old woman. We both set the pace. These things should always be like a dance. When one person thinks they are in control, they are probably kidding themselves. And when someone lets go of control, that can be a very subtle and sneaky form of control itself. Damn, when did ***** get so complicated!
GemmaUK Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 I'm actually wondering if they have flirted at all. She relayed a story about an incident at a strip club but once he turned that into flirting she killed it. There's a difference between a woman who is older and a woman who is a cougar. A woman who is older can be a cougar but just because she is older doesn't mean she is a cougar. 2
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