girlywoman25 Posted June 28, 2014 Posted June 28, 2014 Hi. I have been chatting with a man for about 2 weeks now on a dating site. We talked about meeting but the thing is he lives an hour away from me by train. I don't have my own transportation, if I did by car it would take about 38 mins. I live in NY, I live about 30 mins, by train, from NYC and this man lives in Queens. I am interested in meeting him but just abit worried about the travel arrangements.
WhiskeyJack Posted June 28, 2014 Posted June 28, 2014 Could you not set up a public place to meet in the middle of the both of you?
DArtagnan2 Posted June 28, 2014 Posted June 28, 2014 since he is the guy, he should come to somewhere close to you, that you feel comfortable with for the first meeting at least. If he is reluctant to come to you, and insists you come see him, I would be a bit leery. I say this because even though times have changed, it should still be about making the girl feel comfortable especially when you don't really know him at all. You should also let someone know of your where abouts once that place is decided. 2
Elle1975 Posted June 28, 2014 Posted June 28, 2014 since he is the guy, he should come to somewhere close to you, that you feel comfortable with for the first meeting at least. If he is reluctant to come to you, and insists you come see him, I would be a bit leery. I say this because even though times have changed, it should still be about making the girl feel comfortable especially when you don't really know him at all. You should also let someone know of your where abouts once that place is decided. I second that. I always let my friends know where I will be and who with, when I am on the first date. I mean "who" the best I can.. I don't ask the guy for his ID.. Have him come to you, or meet midway.
Scorpio Chick Posted June 28, 2014 Posted June 28, 2014 Call me old fashioned, but I believe the male should be the one to travel for a first time meeting, not the female. I see it as not a good sign that he would let a female travel alone to meet him.
GemmaUK Posted June 28, 2014 Posted June 28, 2014 Offer to meet somewhere in the middle. If he isn't willing to come to you or meet in the middle I'd be wary and wouldn't go. He is after all a stranger and your safety is paramount. If he isn't considerate of that then he just isn't very considerate - which isn't a good thing in a relationship.
rocketman122 Posted June 28, 2014 Posted June 28, 2014 Hi. I have been chatting with a man for about 2 weeks now on a dating site. We talked about meeting but the thing is he lives an hour away from me by train. I don't have my own transportation, if I did by car it would take about 38 mins. I live in NY, I live about 30 mins, by train, from NYC and this man lives in Queens. I am interested in meeting him but just abit worried about the travel arrangements. I had this dilemma with my ex who I met on OLD. she lives about an hours drive by car or train. I was very hesitant because I already had this experience with a women I dated for 3 weeks in the opposite direction from her and I didnt want to go through that again as it was my first LDR and really it sucked. all I will say is that while our relationship had hardships because of the distance it wasnt enough to stop me from being with her. going to her, truthfully, im suffering, but it was worth it to me. when it first happened, I was very reluctant. but it was on the lower end of the list of things that were an issue for me. I will suggest to you to at least try. you never know till you try. give it a fair chance. if it so happens you meet someone special from far away that may be the hardship you will have to overcome but its a tiny price to pay IMO. take the chance. go see for yourself. never say never. 1
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