Armegoggon Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 I don't know the exact term/phrase for this. A dream crush is someone you like so much and no matter what they say about you or think of you or even their actions won't turn you off. You will usually be very caring and always want to help them out like a "soulmate" or something. Very importantly, you would remember almost all your interactions with that person. Usually we have one when we're single but I don't know if married people still have this dream of wanting them. The best case scenario is marrying the person you have always dreamed about. Here is an example. In the movie Forrest Gump, when he was young he dated Jenny. Then she somehow left and never saw him for many years. She did return to his house many years later and they had sex and bonded well. However, it didn't last long. She left him once again because she thought she didn't deserve to have such a good man like him even though he's always liked and cared about her. So then he received a mail from her of her new address and that was most of the story when he was telling his story to a woman he was trying to ask the directions from. Then finally she told him the directions and went to Jenny's house. That was when their son was there and then the official marriage came. However, shortly after, she would pass away due to AIDS or something. So here is my "dream crush". At some point in March, I started messaging a 26 year old woman on OkCupid. We had a 93% match and we had a great conversation about gaming and a background of our life. Then we exchanged phone numbers and we texted each other just to verify and then called each other for 1 hour. We also had a fun friendly chat and we scheduled to meet in person the next Saturday. However, on Monday, she wrote me back on OkCupid and cancelled the meeting because of my age. I was never lying about my age and whenever she asked me for my age, I told her that I was 18 (turning 19 soon). I even tried to ask if she would just give me a shot but she refused to. Then I was too afraid to ask her for anything else so I only asked if we could be friends and she accepted it. So we had very short conversations later on and we only texted like once a week or so. Then in late April, I found her on Facebook in one of my groups but I didn't even bother sending her a request. I've noticed that her relationship status was updated so she got a boyfriend. At least that's what I'm seeing but even though we still talked, she never admitted on that. Then it started to make me upset and I cried like a lonely girl in my room for a few days and then finally texted her "Can we still meet as friends?" She said that she is busy this week. So then came early May the following week, I texted her again and then she said "don't remind me". The reason I kept going after her was because no other woman would love me. I've always loved women older than me and I never found age such an issue. In fact, what was surprising was she thought I was 24 all along. This would especially be less of a problem the way how she told me she didn't have "future plans" or has any college/university experience. She just worked as an assistant manager at a small retail store. I understood she was busy but at the same time, she told me in the past she would have at least 1 day off every week. I have worked all 7 days of 8+ hours before and I was still able to kick in some time to hang out with my friends once. I know she was also preparing for a convention but she could at least try to hang out with me and her friends. So I admitted to her about my situation and she just said "keep trying". I even asked her what was preventing me from meeting her and she only said that she was busy. She never said anything about not being interested in me even though I've tried to get the truth out of her. Even after the convention she stopped replying my texts unless I'd text her more than once. So today, I feel like it's about time that I visit her store. I have never been there personally but I feel like I need to settle this down because I still have a crush on her and I want to explain to her about what it means to have a "dream crush" on someone. I just feel really sad that she isn't even treating me as good as her normal friends would've. I know there's a sort of boundary between the internet and real life and she is shy but I'm doing all the work and she's doing nothing. If she's not interested in me, then fine, I'll ask an explanation and I'll try to fix myself for her at least find ways to bridge the age gap. In my personal experience, I have had people on the internet tell me about their dream crush. So what is your dream crush? Could you describe it? I know some of you may be married with it but could you describe it as if those days you were single? Try not to get too personal but try to talk about some of your most notable interactions with them. Also, try to include why you have a crush on them. Don't include celebrities/models please.
Diezel Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 #1: Did you really use Forrest Gump as an example? #2: Your dream crush is a 26 year old from OKCupid? You need to live a little more. Go out and see the world, do stuff. What the hell is an 18 year old doing OLD for? I don't have a "dream crush". I did once, when I was 20 and when we finally got together, that quickly became a nightmare. Be fearful of pedestalizing someone, specially people you've never met before. 3
Elle1975 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 What the heck... Are you looking into getting a restraining order? That's the path you're going to take if you show up at her work. You need to wake up, she's not interested, and you stalker-ish behavior isn't going to help. So I don't know what this forrest gump dream crush craziness is all about, but forget about it, and put your ducks in a row. This is nuts. 1
Author Armegoggon Posted June 27, 2014 Author Posted June 27, 2014 What the heck... Are you looking into getting a restraining order? That's the path you're going to take if you show up at her work. You need to wake up, she's not interested, and you stalker-ish behavior isn't going to help. So I don't know what this forrest gump dream crush craziness is all about, but forget about it, and put your ducks in a row. This is nuts. I don't know, do you think I'd know a lot of things? Do you think I've really dated before? Think about it for all you LoveShack users. You need to learn how to stop threatening people on the internet with comments like this. She never insisted on it anyways as I've already raised up that point a few times to her. She never admitted on anything about being interested as a "friend". She may have cut out the part about the date but not as a friend have I seen it cut out. I think I need to get the truth out of her as well. Oh and don't think it's gonna cause a restraining order because she never said anything was wrong with me other than my age. Stumbling ac cross her in person doesn't count as stalking. #1: Did you really use Forrest Gump as an example? #2: Your dream crush is a 26 year old from OKCupid? You need to live a little more. Go out and see the world, do stuff. What the hell is an 18 year old doing OLD for? I don't have a "dream crush". I did once, when I was 20 and when we finally got together, that quickly became a nightmare. Be fearful of pedestalizing someone, specially people you've never met before. I don't like women around my age if that clarifies. I have a lot of problems socializing in real life. I simple am like this. I prefer the internet because I have more internet friends than in real life. Yeah I used Forrest Gump as an example? Was that challenging enough?
DArtagnan2 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 I dream about being with the same girl all the time and I mean I am dreaming when I sleep and this girl, who I don't know, I am always with and in my dreams I have strong feelings for her. Its been consistent for years now, as far back as I can remember. That's a dream crush to me.
d0nnivain Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 I have never had a dream crush. If stupid things that I can't tolerate come out of somebody's mouth or they are rude / nasty, I can't keep liking them or being attracted to them. The closest I have come were some TV actors. Even then I tended to "fall in love" with the characters they play & cringe when the actors themselves spoke or expressed opinions because the characters tended to be conservative like me & the actors liberal. As for your OK Cupid crush, it's never going to happen. You are at different life stages & she doesn't want to date a man who can't even take her to a bar in the US. Since you mentioned Forrest Gump, I'll give you another movie reference: St. Elmo's Fire Emelio Estevez's character is "in love" (lust) with some ER doctor he met & he chases her around, even driving somewhere to interrupt a romantic weekend she is having with her BF. You remind me of that. 1
Author Armegoggon Posted June 27, 2014 Author Posted June 27, 2014 I have never had a dream crush. If stupid things that I can't tolerate come out of somebody's mouth or they are rude / nasty, I can't keep liking them or being attracted to them. The closest I have come were some TV actors. Even then I tended to "fall in love" with the characters they play & cringe when the actors themselves spoke or expressed opinions because the characters tended to be conservative like me & the actors liberal. As for your OK Cupid crush, it's never going to happen. You are at different life stages & she doesn't want to date a man who can't even take her to a bar in the US. Since you mentioned Forrest Gump, I'll give you another movie reference: St. Elmo's Fire Emelio Estevez's character is "in love" (lust) with some ER doctor he met & he chases her around, even driving somewhere to interrupt a romantic weekend she is having with her BF. You remind me of that. Just to clarify, she does not drink or smoke at all. She does a lot of things geeks like to do. She has told me she has never been to a bar. Is there any other major things you can think of that 26 year olds could do but 19 year olds wouldn't. She still lives with her parents and the biggest quote is "no plans for the future".
haribogumsnickers Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 Childhood dream crush was Stephanie Tanner from Full House. Yes, Jodie Sweeden? did it for me all through elementary school. I think Kristy Swanson too in her Buffy movie. More current celeb dream crush is Taylor Swift. Don't ask why. But as for your dream crush, I think you should move on and if she comes to you then cool. 1
Potz4prez Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 Well I've had crushes... but I've never stalked someone. You need to go out in the real world and talk to more girls your age.
Elle1975 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 I don't know, do you think I'd know a lot of things? Do you think I've really dated before? Think about it for all you LoveShack users. You need to learn how to stop threatening people on the internet with comments like this. She never insisted on it anyways as I've already raised up that point a few times to her. She never admitted on anything about being interested as a "friend". She may have cut out the part about the date but not as a friend have I seen it cut out. I think I need to get the truth out of her as well. Oh and don't think it's gonna cause a restraining order because she never said anything was wrong with me other than my age. Stumbling ac cross her in person doesn't count as stalking. I don't like women around my age if that clarifies. I have a lot of problems socializing in real life. I simple am like this. I prefer the internet because I have more internet friends than in real life. Yeah I used Forrest Gump as an example? Was that challenging enough? Oh I am not threatening you. I am telling you what will probably happen. You take the advice or you leave it, it doesn't matter to me. It won't be on my police record, and I won't be slammed with a restraining order. You have a lot of problem socializing in real life? I am surprised. Anyway, good luck. 1
Author Armegoggon Posted June 27, 2014 Author Posted June 27, 2014 Childhood dream crush was Stephanie Tanner from Full House. Yes, Jodie Sweeden? did it for me all through elementary school. I think Kristy Swanson too in her Buffy movie. More current celeb dream crush is Taylor Swift. Don't ask why. But as for your dream crush, I think you should move on and if she comes to you then cool. Did you read or not? Well I've had crushes... but I've never stalked someone. You need to go out in the real world and talk to more girls your age. I don't consider that stalking and I'm sure a lot of girls seem so "insecure". No way, women around my age don't give a respect for who I am. I dislike women around my age because they can be such dramatic hoes. From where I live, I don't have the opportunity to find a date off of that so the real world is not for me unless I move to a better neighbourhood. Oh I am not threatening you. I am telling you what will probably happen. You take the advice or you leave it, it doesn't matter to me. It won't be on my police record, and I won't be slammed with a restraining order. You have a lot of problem socializing in real life? I am surprised. Anyway, good luck. Nah I was talking about you way how you wrote the post. Anyways, she never refused to talk to me and she even said that we could be friends and if she's not busy she'll meet. She never warned me about the restraining order or anything if "you continue to talk to me". 5 minutes ago, I just contacted the free lawyer service and they said that she has no reason to pull a restraining order if I meet her in her store the first time based on what I've told the lawyer. So in other words, if the woman doesn't warn me on throwing the restraining order, I am in a safe position. I will move away if she uses it. Now I don't want to sound like I want things but there's a lot of questions I wanted to ask her, most of it is regarding whether she is interested in me as a "friend" or not.
d0nnivain Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 At 26 if she's still living at home with her parents & "has no plans for the future" what she wants is somebody older & more established then a 19 year old who will take her away from her otherwise hum drum existence. As for other things a 19 year old can't do that a 26 year old may want: * have life experience & a worldly perspective on things * be able to discuss college in the past tense & have actually learned something there * have finished sewing his wild oats * be ready to settle down * be financially stable
jbelle6 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 I guess it's ALL about what you want huh OP? What she wants doesn't matter a bit right? Everything is you you you. SHE doesn't want to be with you. She met you on OK Cupid, you are not really friends, people say yes to being friends when they are put on the spot. If you go into her work with that friend crap she will probably say yes to get rid of you. Know how you can tell if she wants to be friends? Leave her the heck alone and see if she bothers to call or spend time with you. And you are being dishonest, you don't want to be her friend, you are no friend to her. You are selfish. 8 years when one is still a teenager is a valid reason for her to not date you, get over it. And this is not threatening, these are facts.
jbelle6 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 I have never had a dream crush. If stupid things that I can't tolerate come out of somebody's mouth or they are rude / nasty, I can't keep liking them or being attracted to them. The closest I have come were some TV actors. Even then I tended to "fall in love" with the characters they play & cringe when the actors themselves spoke or expressed opinions because the characters tended to be conservative like me & the actors liberal. As for your OK Cupid crush, it's never going to happen. You are at different life stages & she doesn't want to date a man who can't even take her to a bar in the US. Since you mentioned Forrest Gump, I'll give you another movie reference: St. Elmo's Fire Emelio Estevez's character is "in love" (lust) with some ER doctor he met & he chases her around, even driving somewhere to interrupt a romantic weekend she is having with her BF. You remind me of that. OK, ignore my whole post above! I have changed my answer to Emilio Estevez circa The Breakfast Club and St. Elmo's Fire (minus the duct taping and stalkerish tendencies).
SleeplessIn Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 In my opinion, it would not be the behavior of a "friend" to come around my job when I am working just so he could meet me, unless I gave him permission to do that. It's her JOB for pete's sake. Her boss might have a thing or two to say about her socializing with "visitors". Also, in fact it IS tantamount to stalking for you to go to her job. There's no way she will view it as you "just happened" to stumble across her there, or "just happened" to go into that store. She will know you planned it. If she wanted to be Real Friends in Real Life, she would make time to meet you. The fact she is repeatedly "busy" is her kind way of saying "no."
Recommended Posts