Dumper keeps coming back?

[innocentbutterfly]

I believe my ex has serious mental issues.

 

He already was controlling when in relationship. We were together for two years long distance.

 

No I have found out he found another cyber girl to **** around with and probably lure her to visit him just to use her for sex and then say bye.

 

Yeah. I dont believe any of his love for me was ever real. Except maybe one month of it. He just liked. not liked. Loved our sex life. Even long distance.

 

So long story short.

 

In march I told him i don't want to hear from him again because he was incapable of being a friend post breakup. He kept reminiscing our sex life and i just got sick of it. I was liking someone else.

 

So i told him farewell. He wished me well as in i deserve the best blah bla. Idiot. then A month and a half later he wrote me. There was muslim holiday and he wrote to ask me for forgiveness. Saying he cant stand in front of god knowing what he did to me. Of course i didnt forgive. I told him that and said bye.

 

Now a month later again he wrote me saying he had news. Like I cared. This time he saw he has no hold on me anymore. None. I was ice cold. and if i were guessing id say the guy was even a bit sad and shocked i was so saying you can say nicely if you dont want to talk to me and dont care so i dont disturb you.

 

Then he went on telling me how he had news. One was he supposedly burned his face, He said id fear and not recognize him if i saw him. Of course no photo to that so I dont know what to believe. Then his other news was he went back to read our chat history on one of his old fake profiles and he was happy reading it saying how we seemed like two happy kids. and in the back of my mind i loled because he always complained over my childiness.

 

And he saeid if he had more history he would read. Theres tons of sex chat too. Plus he lied that he ever deleted my hot videos i made for him when we were together. He also refuses to delete. He lied that he did and says i can keep them. "its not that i feel something for you when i watch them. they dont make me hot. i just watch and i havent in a few months"

 

then i told him i had all our history saved, photos, videos, chats. because im just a keeper as a reminder and stuff. i dont delete ex stuff. and he said if i could send him all including my all hot videos. I repeatedly told him theres no point in rereading old stuff as its to me like staring into a blank wall without feelings. but he insisted it makes him happy.

 

I told him i can give him chat history but no videos of mine of course. And told him even what he suggests is unfair to his current long distance gf which im assuming is just his **** buddy. He said its my problem and it doesnt mean i am cheating or you are if you are looking my videos.

 

He wanted to know if i still looked his hot videos and again for a millionth time told me how i do it so good and that he cant feel so good with anyone (speaking of sex, virtual and real) I told him i have to disappoint him bt i havent touched his videos since i we broke up half a year ago and i got a new long distance relationship. He said but maybe you did its not like you are cheating bla bla.

 

Then he went on and asked me if he can ask how many guys have i had sex with since him. He got my virginity. and i told him repeatedly i wont answer to him. that to me hes just somebody i used to know. and i dont explain my sex life to strangers. he insisted then said okay and went to sleep saying how he looks forward that ill send him chats.

 

What the hell is his problem? what guy goes back to his ex talking like that if he has a new gf and is happy? to me it seems he isnt. and why would he tell me about his burned face. does he expect ill feel pity and tell him i forgive him? i just dont get it wtf does he think or want. and why does he read our old chats teling me they make him happy and at same time that he feels nothing about me while reading/watching my videos. why does he do that then and keep coming back contacting me asking me about my sex life?

 

i seriously think he has mental issues

[innocentbutterfly]

Guys ur input on this?

[Purepony]

Maybe he just wants an ego boost.

 

Why did you even respond? And of he mailed you again would you reply again?

[Zahara]

What the hell is his problem?

 

No, what is your problem? Why are you engaging with him?

 

what guy goes back to his ex talking like that if he has a new gf and is happy? to me it seems he isnt.

 

A guy that didn't respect you and doesn't give a damn about anyone but himself. It's not about happiness for him, it's about using people to satisfy his needs.

 

and why would he tell me about his burned face. does he expect ill feel pity and tell him i forgive him?

 

He hopes it'll tug at your heartstrings and that you'll open the door so he can manipulate and control you again.

 

i just dont get it wtf does he think or want. and why does he read our old chats teling me they make him happy and at same time that he feels nothing about me while reading/watching my videos. why does he do that then and keep coming back contacting me asking me about my sex life?

 

He does that to make you feel nostalgic and hopefully open the door to him again. He's back to see if he can lure you in again.

 

i seriously think he has mental issues

 

You keep pretending like you don't care in your post but it seems like you do care. If he has mental issues, then why are you engaging with him and cracking your brain to understand why he's doing what he's doing? Can't explain the actions of someone who is mentally unstable, yes?

[innocentbutterfly]

Pirepony I dont want to hold grudges or be rude. I sent him those chats today and he sent me some photos we had together that I wanted in better quality.

 

because he wrote me again last night asking if i got them.

 

well if that would be the case to lure me or whatever he wouldnt be saying he has no feelings left right. He has a long distance girlfriend again now...but they started in january so the ony explanation I can get from this is hes getting bored of her and he wrote me again. Why else would any man still contact ex and watch or read her stuff? I guess he just likes the known ground plus his obsession with sexual stuff.

 

I dont care about him. I have a boyfriend that I love now. And we will meet soon. When I told him that and that hes from his country and im coming there again he started replying less jokingly than before. So I hope he grasped it all. Tho I dont think in any way he would do it with any feelings intention because I know him. He always loved our sex life the most and he kept saying how its different with me. Thats why hes coming back I think

[Zahara]

You don't have to hold grudges. You don't have to be rude. Ignoring someone doesn't constitute any of those things. Ignoring someone that treated you badly means that you're disregarding someone that disrespected you. There's nothing rude about that. Why are you quick to appease his feelings i.e. don't want to be rude, etc. when he had no regard for yours?

 

You make contact because you are curious about the attention. It could be you're truly not over it and it makes you feel good to be validated.

 

Ok, let's go with he's getting bored. So, now he's bored and he's focusing on you. What's so great about that? You should be sickened at the fact that he's 1) playing another woman 2) using you as a tool for excitement.

 

I'm not understanding the objective of this thread. "I don't care about him" but you care enough to post a thread about him and analyze his every move. You have a boyfriend. Focus on that relationship and leave your past behind. And if you haven't fully resolved your past, be on your own and work through it.

 

Your boyfriend should be all the "validation" you need.

Edited June 26, 2014 by Zahara

[innocentbutterfly]

Well the objective was just to hear your peoples inputs that have gone through stuff like that already. I have no intention in keeping contact with him.

 

And my boyfriend right now is making me happiest than I ever was. I just dont understand the morals on my ex. Its funny he left me for his morals because of my wrong doings when he has double standards and how he keeps contacting reminiscing and saying reading our old convos make him happy

 

Like what for. It was the only thing I wondered but ur right. Ill just forget the whys and carry on as I did before

[Zahara]

Your ex is your past. You are not responsible nor is it any of your business anymore to "understand" his morals. If my relationship and my boyfriend is making me happy, the thought of analyzing an ex's actions would be a complete waste of time and I would not even care. Why? Because I'm indifferent and have no desire in investing any time and effort into him, but most importantly communicating with him would be the last thing I would do, especially if he disrespected me in the past.

 

And stop exchanging text, pictures, etc. with your ex. You're only letting him know that you are still connected to him.

[innocentbutterfly]

As I said I was the one stopping contact in march. He cane back writing me twice so its not exactly like im investing my time into him.

[ThorntonMelon]

As I said I was the one stopping contact in march. He cane back writing me twice so its not exactly like im investing my time into him.

And my boyfriend right now is making me happiest than I ever was.

 

And yet here you are posting about your ex instead of your current boyfriend.

[Zahara]

As I said I was the one stopping contact in march. He cane back writing me twice so its not exactly like im investing my time into him.

 

You're investing time in him by currently engaging and swapping pictures, text messages, back and forth about the past.

 

Just because he writes to you it doesn't mean you should respond. And don't justify that by saying you don't want to hold grudges or be rude. It's not a reason or excuse.

 

And why do you want pictures of you and him because it's of better quality? Shut it down. You are in a relationship. Honor that and stay away from this guy.