Frustration..

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Hi guys,

 

 

I broke up with someone a few days ago, and although it wasn't long ago and I know it needed to happen I am having a hard time coming to terms with it. We were together for a year, and, initially, it went well, although he seemed hard work and often distant. He still seemed keen to keep in touch and through time, although we were getting on better, he still seemed distant and to be keeping me at arms length. After a few months had passed I was falling for him, but still frustrated with the situation, and felt like I was the only one making any effort. He was always very awkard with talking about feelings, sharing, etc, but I eventually asked if he wanted me in his life, as I felt pushed out. He said that he did, but hadn't got a lot to offer emotionally, as various things had made him this way (ie, previous relationship break ups, difficult upbringing, family life), so basically not to expect too much from him. I asked that he simply tried, that I wasn't going to push him into any big commitments too soon, and that we could take it slow. Looking back, I should have ended it then, but as I was already invested, I wanted to give it a try, it was the first time I'd felt that way about someone in years.

 

 

It got a little better after that, but the past few months got worse, he would never get in contact, I was left to make all of the effort, and the time we spent together was getting less and less. I spent so many sleepless nights thinking of how hard I was trying, what was wrong with me, why I couldn't make him happy, what had happened to him to make him this way, as we seemed so right together but he couldn't seem to commit. Eventually, I got to the point that I told him how much he was hurting me and what he wanted. He basically told me that he had issues that he couldn't overcome, and as much as he thought I was amazing, couldn't be in a relationship until he had dealt with things, and this was why he kept me at arms length, so that it wouldn't be so bad for me when I'd had enough. All I could get out of him was that he had a bad perspective on life in general, didn't like himself, a past break up was still haunting him (although he had been single for over a year when we met) and it wasn't fair on me that I had to suffer as a result of his personal problems. I now feel so hurt, and annoyed that he was so wrapped up in this that he couldn't see what he was doing to me the whole time, I don't really know what the answer is here but it's the worst feeling to think that i'll never really know what was going on in his head. I would have moved the earth to have made him happy and am now left feeling like this. I know there's not really an answer for all of this, but any words of encouragement would be appreciated! xx

[Reels]

He likes someone else now? Or he is just a coward who can't make real commitments.

 

Hopefully, you may want to adapt new hobbies, and carry on your real life duties, you may move on or exempt yourself from this mad feeling.