Vero Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 I'm a 16 year old guy; an incoming Junior in High school. Sophomore year was the first time I was intimate with a girl ever. My neediness* and and 'safe' personality at the time scared her away and she's with another dude now. We were sooo into each other. We went on two dates but they were important dates. I had all the opportunity to take the relationship to the next level but I was too nervous and scared to. Here are some examples: 1) One day we went over to her house after school and when we were there, we were sitting on the couch, and she got really close, put her leg on mine and started rubbing my arm. I froze up and didn't do anything. 2) That same day at her house, we were in the kitchen alone, and we were sitting on bar stools, and she scooted closer and put her hand up my shirt and started feeling me, saying things like "I can't stop touching you!". I still didn't get the message and did nothing. 3)We were sitting on her bed (yup...) and talking about her ex. I didn't do anything... 4)Prior to me going to her house, we were talking on the phone about how she was going to get her braces removed, and she said "I've never kissed a boy without my braces..." I STILL DIDN'T GET IT. I had all the opportunity to make out and touch her; escalate, but I didn't do anything. Didn't kiss her, didn't touch her. Nothing. As you can see, I made the worst, most painful mistakes possible, and I have learned to accept that I was a different person at the time, but it's messing with me inside. This all happened 7 months ago, but since then I haven't even come close to getting with anyone I've been attracted to. There's always some stupid obstacle in the way of anything happening. And it freaking irritates me to see my friends be with their girl, when I should have been with mine too. I don't care about this particular girl anymore, but I'm still lovesick. I was one step away from a relationship and I didn't go all the way, so I've been forced to bottle up all my emotions like nothing happened while she's rubbing on some other guy. Am I just meant to hurt like this for another 6-12 months without a partner? The last 8 months have been the most painful months of my life. I've waited so long for someone else and I haven't found them. Yes, I focus on other things in my life like family, friends, and working out, but it always comes back to having a partner; someone I can connect with and be happy with. What do I do with myself now? What would YOU do? Thanks in advance. *I think my neediness comes from my mom and dad being divorced. I have a stepmom, but it's not a close relationship at all. I visit my real mom every once in a while but I've never really had a women to cling and vent to, and I found that in my first girlfriend, and she was probably repulsed by it).
d0nnivain Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 Nobody is a Don Juan suave romantic guy at 16. Even the 16 year olds on TV have grown adults writing the scenes for them. You didn't do anything wrong & you have plenty of time to get more comfortable & confident with the opposite sex Summer is a wonderful to meet new people, have adventures & grow. Take advantage of that.
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