hopefullove Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Hello! So today is the first morning after my break up with a guy I had only been dating for 3 months. I just want to take this moment to reflect on it because right now I really want to lol. I woke up this morning feeling really good, like a weight had be lifted off me, I remember just yesterday I was feeling so alone, it was more lonely being with someone, than to be single and free of worry or care of someone, if they would text you, call you, when you would see them again. I met a guy 3 months ago and we saw each other 2x a week except the last 3 weeks which I did not see him at all! And during that time, he decided that didn't want to do it anymore, even though in our last convo, he said he was "committed to making us happy"... he had just started a law business and while I was determined to try to be as understanding as i humanly could be, it was unfulfilled and left unsatisfied, disappointed, and hurt a lot. I can't fault him for being a bad guy. He wasn't horrible at all, although, as someone who built me up so much, told me he was in love with me so quickly, that i was perfect, and that he was so lucky to have someone like me, to quickly dump it because I started asking for things to make me happy. I wanted to be dated, and wanted to do things together, but he wanted to stay in to spend time together, and would often fall asleep. Also, he wasn't a man of his word, he said so many things, and I feel he knew how to act, but since he got by on doing very little, he continued to act the way he pleased. And when he did make some effort, i was thrilled by so little. It took us 1.5 months to have dinner together, and i kept mentioning what a big foodie I was. Broken promises I forgave as absentmindedness, he just used words as empty gestures, and to me, someone's word means a lot. I also have a temper, and I get quickly annoyed when not being treated fairly, and I am treated very well by my friends, coworkers, family, so I quickly know what is not on par, though to my skewed experience of being a pampered and spoiled kitten. I guess it was nice that he called me last night and stayed on the phone with me for 40 minutes. Though I was very upset that he dragged it out for I think 2 weeks longer than when he was already mentally done. But it was during my birthday, and he bailed on my birthday plans, which was fine because he made reservations for dinner at 10:45 PM on a Sunday... boggles the mind. I think he felt he couldn't make me happy, and didn't want to make any more effort than he already was making, so in the end it wasn't worth it anymore to him. And what triggered it was I told him I needed quality time, not quantity, but he already thought we spent quality time together, with him coming over, passing out, on the couch. I don't think that can grow a relationship, and I wanted to explore the city, and do things, and he kept saying we would do this and that, but he never had the time. I said if he really wanted to, he'd find a way, and he said "it isn't always that easy", but I think it is. It's hard, I would not have ended things with him because we had good chemistry, physical chemistry, he was nice and polite, and was sweet and gave me emotional support, he always responded to my messages, and with thoughtfulness, he was a good communicator, and when we had issues he always attempted to find a solution, and smart handsome and ambitious/hardworking. However, he was not a man of his word often, he says things but I seldom saw action, he was selfish at times, and lazy, he is probably spoiled at home. So today I am very cheerful. It's strange, maybe because I am older and it's just easier when you dont see a bright future with someone you let it go. I'll continue to remember the red flags of someone telling me they are in love with me, like within the first month (WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME), and then to end like this.
Recommended Posts