leesc90 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 -Ex called me after a long while; -Says at first it was easy to block me out of her life -She regrets her decision at times -she realized she isnt over me its been 5 months. 3 since we last saw each other. Is this a breadcrumb? Or should I act on it? I dont understand, she misses me, she regrets, but she still doesnt move for us to get back together. She ended the convo saying, i'll see you around i guess. women are the bane of my existence.
Zahara Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 I read your past threads. She's done this before. Keeping you on a string. She's not mature or emotionally present for you. It would be best for you to remain NC. I have a feeling she does this to keep you on the backburner while she does what she does. 7
Author leesc90 Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 I read your past threads. She's done this before. Keeping you on a string. She's not mature or emotionally present for you. It would be best for you to remain NC. I have a feeling she does this to keep you on the backburner while she does what she does. yeah, you're right. i work so hard to get to where I am, and then i lose my ability to think clear when my heartstrings are tugged. I appreciate the response friend. 1
Zahara Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 yeah, you're right. i work so hard to get to where I am, and then i lose my ability to think clear when my heartstrings are tugged. I appreciate the response friend. I'm sure it does cause you confusion. Maybe it would be time to remove her from communication since it sets you back? Nothing has changed and even at this point she's still playing mind games with you. If she did want you back, nothing would stop her from reaching out to you. Leaving a little door open just in case on leaves you open to more of these games.
Chi townD Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Dude, welcome back to a couple of pegs ago in your healing! Will you PLEASE stop talking to this chick! Everything in post screams of keeping you on a string. Keeping you on the hook. Because, guess what? Conversation is over and you're still alone! She got her leesc90 fix and going back to her life. Next time, let it go to voicemail.
shoegal4 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Oh man...my ex did this to me long before I heard of the word "breadcrumbs" and I always went back for more. It put me in a terrible spot. If I were you, I would ignore and not feed into her anymore. If she wanted to be with you, she would be. Give her a good dose of reality by no longer feeding into her ego. Let her think. 2
Author leesc90 Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 this forum is incredibly useful for gaining thinking that is detached from emotions. thanks guys. i feel like a fool for being so nice about all this to her. i need to stop pouring my heart out to her when she gives me an inch. im a damn fool
Haydn Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 They are taking a new model for a test drive. Maybe they can test it for 10 days. If they are unhappy they can go back to their old model who is waiting patiently in the garage. Don't talk to them! 3
Author leesc90 Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 They are taking a new model for a test drive. Maybe they can test it for 10 days. If they are unhappy they can go back to their old model who is waiting patiently in the garage. Don't talk to them! yeah.. ive been told out of respect for myself I shouldnt even take her back even if that option someday becomes available. agree? i feel like me pouring my soul out to her, telling her i forgave her and that im over it when im really not just fckkked myself hard.
me85 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Don't beat yourself up too much. This has most likely happened to us all at one point or another. I still get breadcrumbs after nearly a year & my ex moved on to "greener pastures" 6 months ago. I don't entertain him anymore because I was just degrading myself. I still get emails everyday. The reason I haven't stuck by keeping him blocked & NC is because I'm still not completely over him, I guess. OR WORSE...I can't imagine not keeping in touch with my former best friend. That's the hardest part for me. I don't think of him romantically really. That part just doesn't have any effect on me anymore. I don't get emotional or upset or cry about him...for a long time now. I'm not at all worried about these things though, because nothing lasts forever. I know one day I'll wake up and he won't be in my thoughts anymore. Sometimes feelings race away, sometimes they have to slowly fade away... but rest assure that at some point, they do go away.
Ben Dover Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 ACTIONS WILL ALWAYS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS. This is the best statement ever when it comes to relationships. So many times my ex did this, but when it came back to actually getting back together she always said "I need to be single right now and figure things out" ANYYYBODY can say these things. Its when they act on it then you can put some value to the words they say. I found out the hard way. Don't be like me people. 3
Smarty Pants Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 She is saying this for her benefit, not yours. She doesn't want to be with you and is probably annoyed that she still has feelings for you. She is still attached to you. Don't get this confused for wanting to be with you again. I hope you continue to not speak to this person. 1
Omei Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 If she really missed you and had regret she would be attempting to get you back not throwing pretty words your way.
lauri Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Typical. Contacts you, says all these things...EXCEPT for the most important thing - "I made a mistake and I want you back, and I'm willing to do anything to make us get back together". Go pure NC, block her number and never speak to her again. If she somehow contacts you again, tell her simply that she should not be contacting you with all the bs and that you're sorry to hear that she hasn't moved on. Explain very clearly that you expect this to be the last time you two talk. You need to make sure she understands that you aren't someone who deserves to be put on the back burner and that you won't put up with her anymore. All of her messages meant nothing - my ex did the same thing and all she wanted was an ego boost and to make me "not forget her". Some people are so selfish it isn't even funny.. 3
Author leesc90 Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 what makes this situation all the more painful is knowing that, on that day i chose to forgive her of all the **** shes done and tell her not to feel bad bc im over it. im not, ive essentially said oh its okay to **** me over and do whatever the hell youve done. what an idiot i am, who does that
elseaacych Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 what makes this situation all the more painful is knowing that, on that day i chose to forgive her of all the **** shes done and tell her not to feel bad bc im over it. im not, ive essentially said oh its okay to **** me over and do whatever the hell youve done. what an idiot i am, who does that Lots of us. In the heat of the moment, you say stuff you don't mean, and may even regret. So what if they think you're cool with them? If you stay NC, actions will speak louder than words. 1
Author leesc90 Posted June 25, 2014 Author Posted June 25, 2014 yeah. im glad people here understand and havent given up on me. because this has happened before and i should know better. i hope me going to see her after 2 months doesnt severely cripple any chances of reconciliation. i guess taht shouldnt mattter at this point.
Author leesc90 Posted June 27, 2014 Author Posted June 27, 2014 i asked her to talk tonight.. im gonna ask everything that confuses me now and let it be after that. i cant keep talking to this woman like this
Justaguy30 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 If you go back to her she will do the same thing she did the last time because that is who she is. She likely won't change and then a few months or years from now you will be sitting in the same place wondering the same things and will have wasted even more of your time. Just forget about it and move on, she is out having her fun no doubt. You should be too.
Justaguy30 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 If you actually want her back ignoring her will make her want you more. Get her contacting you more often and then you can start mind F>>>*** her haha
changchewsoon Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 My ex did the same with me as well, after I dumped her ass and went NC, boy the kind of things she tried to pull just to get my attention and a response out from me. Twice she went to my place and waited for me for hours, with the most recent one she waited in the car until she ran out of gas! Look, she's gonna do the same thing she did the last time, and you're never gonna get out of the cycle if you get yourself back in.
sugarlove Posted June 29, 2014 Posted June 29, 2014 So she regret her decision but still stand by her decision to dump you? Heck, that's not good enough. That's not even a real apology. Stand your ground, do not contact her until she apologised to you properly like the way you deserve to be treated. With respect.
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