BlueIris Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Put it in your profile- I prefer slender to average sized women. Lots of men do it. I put in my profile that I won't date a FoxNews watcher. It narrowed things down considerably. 8
Targetlock Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Great things come in all manner of different sizes and packages
soccerrprp Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 ...for using the term "fatties" ... As someone who struggled with weight issues when I was younger I know what it feels like to be mocked and made fun of. Ugh, for someone who should know better.... Put it in your profile- I prefer slender to average sized women. Lots of men do it. Or just don't respond or block their profiles.
TigerLilly78 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Thanks for your responses. I sincerely apologize for using the term "fatties" for those who were offended. As someone who struggled with weight issues when I was younger I know what it feels like to be mocked and made fun of. But yet if you weren't called on it you would have had no porb using it..sorry I tend to call BS when I see it..believe it or not "fatties" are humans too and as carhill said im sure you yourself fit into some label..just ether don't respond or better yet put in your profile that your looking for some one fit prob solved..
Gaeta Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Just don't answer. You don't owe anyone any explanation. I've put in my profile once I had a preference for a type of men and it only got me a bunch of hate messages from men not fitting in. 1
carhill Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Just don't answer. You don't owe anyone any explanation. I've put in my profile once I had a preference for a type of men and it only got me a bunch of hate messages from men not fitting in. I'll just never get the hate message part, especially with men our age. Jeez, life is too short. If that's part of what makes them 'real men', happy I missed that memo. IME, I never rejected a woman except in person, save for one who blew my phone up at all hours of the night and was clearly sideways mentally. We got an early divorce Essentially, dating site 'contacts' are electrons tossed about by two strangers and, for the most part, are unregulated and/or unmoderated. Be who you want to be, OP
ponchsox Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 I never understood why obese women think they deserve an attractive fit man. I mean for goodness sake, get yourself under control and in shape before you start shooting for the stars. 3
GoreSP Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Why is 'thanks but I don't think we're a good match' not an option? Is your first instinct to not be polite in your rejection? Because she's overweight? I mean really... 1
Gaeta Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Why is 'thanks but I don't think we're a good match' not an option? Is your first instinct to not be polite in your rejection? Because she's overweight? I mean really... No no no, I tried the thanks but no thanks, then they ask why, then they try to debate with you, it's unbearable. 1
Gaeta Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 I never understood why obese women think they deserve an attractive fit man. I mean for goodness sake, get yourself under control and in shape before you start shooting for the stars. The same phenomenon the other way around. Lots of big I mean BIG men think they are entitled to fit chick. 4
TigerLilly78 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 I never understood why obese women think they deserve an attractive fit man. I mean for goodness sake, get yourself under control and in shape before you start shooting for the stars. Ignorant and judgmental much? they deserve what ever they want like any other human being.. 2
ponchsox Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Ignorant and judgmental much? they deserve what ever they want like any other human being.. Deserving and getting are two different things... 3
TigerLilly78 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Deserving and getting are two different things... ignorance is still ignorance..your point being?
Elle1975 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 My brother is in the ++ size kind of women. He likes them "comfy" - not obese. He's super fit. Anyway.. enough said. 1
Targetlock Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 I never understood why obese women think they deserve an attractive fit man. I mean for goodness sake, get yourself under control and in shape before you start shooting for the stars. that is just so cold, maybe because they can see past the physical and not judge a person solely on appearance and see them who they really are.
spiderowl Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Just be blatant and honest that you think they are too fat. It sort of sounds like that is what you want to do. Obviously you will need to remember who you have said this to though and be able to recognise them when they put their new photos up after losing weight and becoming a yoga teacher and look like your dream girl. They're likely to remember who you are from the fat comment you made so be aware that you may not get the most pleasant response (and she will have told her friends on the site about your comment - most ladies I know myself included have friends in the locality on these sites) This is called Karma. Or, just don't reply rather than making someone feel like you think they are inferior to you. Brilliant!
Elle1975 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 that is just so cold, maybe because they can see past the physical and not judge a person solely on appearance and see them who they really are. Well he's a bit cold .. but I don't think overweight people see people for who they really are. They are like everybody else, they like a nice fit body. So the thought is noble, but it's not true. If it was, everybody would date based on personality. It's not the case. To each his own. 2
TigerLilly78 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 Really its about the basic human right of respect im a plus size person and im not ashamed of it. You don't have to date me if your not attracted to me fair enough totally understandable. But ill be dammed if im going to tolerate disrespect just cause im not some ones ideal women or be talked down to like im some kind of inferior person.. 3
MissBee Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 Why would a bigger woman need a different type of rejection than a normal woman? Exactly. If you aren't attracted to someone you aren't and I don't think fat women require some special form of rejection. On dating sites though if you're not interested you don't need to reply, that says it all. 6
MissBee Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 Ignorant and judgmental much? they deserve what ever they want like any other human being.. Ditto. The idea that fat people should only date fat people, skinny, skinny etc is ridiculous. People are attracted to what they are attracted to and it isn't about being deserving. I have a friend who is a personal trainer, he's a very fit guy who works out as a profession, guess what? He prefers bigger women. That is the only type of women I've ever seen him date and fit women who think he should somehow automatically like them give him flack for it...but he likes what he likes and his own fitness level doesn't change that. Everyone is entitled to like anyone they want and there is no rule that people are only attracted to people who look similar to them: black people can date white people, skinny people can date fat people and the list goes on. Novel idea huh? Also the idea that people who are fat automatically never do physical activity or those who aren't automatically love working out or got there by some kind of hard work is absurd. I know skinny people who are just naturally that way and sit on the couch all day and have zero interest in any exercise, likewise one of my bigger friends has been an athlete since high school and college but she is still big...but no one loves working out, hiking, belly dancing and all kinds of activity more than her and she is well over 250 lbs. So people need to stop being so rigid about what they think fatness or skinniness means as its often false stereotypes and also let go of the idea that one type of body type is only allowed to date the same kind of body type. 6
soccerrprp Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 Why would a bigger woman need a different type of rejection than a normal woman? No difference at all!
yajiuma Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 So what about us who used to be large, still have some to lose, but for whom physical fitness and achieving it actually are strong values? When I saw that on a profile, I assumed he actually meant that keeping fit was a priority for him. I didn't realize it was code for, "I want a stick figure girlfriend." You are right, it could go both ways. However I personally would think that if someone put something along the lines "I want a women who values health and physical fitness and takes care of their body" they were trying to weed out the larger ladies. I guess I'm just sensitive to those types of turns of phrase on a dating profile, being a larger lass myself. My main point was that perhaps there is something on his profile phrasing that is suggesting he is open to women of all sizes, when obviously he is not. Ultimately the readers of his profile are free to determine what he means, as he is free to respond or ignore.
TigerLilly78 Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 So all human beings deserve whatever they want? Sweet! I want a bajillion dollars, a couple porn star girlfriends, and...wait. It doesn't really work that way. People do NOT deserve whatever they want. Not to mention that what people deserve is meaningless. Reality is what matters. Reality is, you do NOT deserve to be with whatever kind of person you want just by virtue of you being born a human being. So there for a very skinny man doesn't deserve a very attractive women because maybe he is to skinny? or a short man dose not deserve to date a tall women? just trying to get this right or dose the stereo type only apply to over weight people? people deserve to want what ever they want some times they get it some times they don't but to sit there and say they don't deserve the right to desire something is wrong.. 1
Kid_Charlemange Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 No one deserves to date anyone. "Deserve's got nothin to do with it." -William Munny, "Unforgiven" 4
TigerLilly78 Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 You said: That is different from: You have the right to desire whatever you want, doesn't mean you have the right to get it. No one deserves to date anyone. Again, deserve has nothing to do with reality. Imo people do deserve to have what they think they want weather or not they get it is another story. So you don't think you deserve a billion dollars interesting?..lol Im an over weight women and I think I deserve to be as happy as anyone else here and IF that includes a guy whose fit so be it..my weight doesn't make me any less deserving of that..im sorry if that angry's anyone..
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