thekid36 Posted June 25, 2014 Posted June 25, 2014 thekid36 - I agree that I came here for advice on questions I had. I did not come on here for folks to attempt to pyschoanalyze me or the situation. I appreciate and really did enjoy many of the posts. It's just funny that when I ask about terms such as "hanging out" vs "dating" folks ran with being insecure - how do you get to that conclusion based on a question about whether I am getting old and missed a rule change somewhere? It's more me thinking aloud, if I give advice I like to relate it to the question not try to presume I can be in someone else's head or situation. Least I find people are more receptive to a new point of view if you don't overshoot the target. That's all, not trying to be mean or insinuate anything. This was my first time here and I was very impressed with the maturity and diversity of posts, I just think in my case, less info is more? Thanks for the check, I appreciate it. :-) Hi, Blue! I totally get what it is that first brought you here. I do like to talk an awful lot. But, I also try to be a good listener as well. Key word there would be try! Because even still, I am sure that mistakes have been made here or there on my part. Based on monumental misinterpretations. If it is any help at all. I definitely don't see you as being insecure. Do not determine that you are getting old. Gosh, if that is the case, then I am absolutely ancient! Not reading that you have missed any new rules. All I sense is that you just know a lot of what it is that you are looking for. And, I just think that if this man was completely interested in you, he would not have showed attention to anyone but you. No matter all else that might come into play. The fact that he did brings up cause for concern. Because, it seems to have been a possible red flag to you. Just exactly as it would have been for me. Sometimes, you just have to go with your initial instincts. Please consider hanging out here more. You seem like an intuitive and intelligent individual. 1
Diezel Posted June 26, 2014 Posted June 26, 2014 I've never heard the phrase "hanging out" more than I ever have in my last 5 years. It's ridiculous. There are no "date nights" anymore... people don't ask each other out... even online dating has evolved into, let's plan to "hang out". I just think it's the evolution of dating right now in which you hang out until you are exclusive. Personally, I think its ridiculous since it has a friendly connotation to it. I'm surprised a man is using it because quite frankly... I've only heard it from women. Then again, I don't date men so I could be very wrong. The insistence of the "hang out" and the term "friends" when there is clearly a romantic mutual interest is annoying to me and pretty problematic, but as long as both parties are getting what they want from it, you could call it "frolicking in mud" and it wouldn't matter.
Daisy-oliviaWentcher Posted June 26, 2014 Posted June 26, 2014 Maybe it's my culture and in my country ... or just me... but i have no problem with " hanging out". Dating becomes pressured and suddenly I feel i have to act a certain way or be a certain person. I'm not use to being taken out on dates so perhaps it's something i have to get use to.... still getting exposed to... but throw in the word "date" and things become very pressured. I'd rather just " hang out" with no pressure.
Author BlueValentine Posted June 27, 2014 Author Posted June 27, 2014 Please consider hanging out here more. You seem like an intuitive and intelligent individual. thekid36 - Thank you so much! I definitely am fond of this forum and plan to check in from time to time. I absolutely respect your openness and I think you gave some great advice. :-)
thekid36 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 thekid36 - Thank you so much! I definitely am fond of this forum and plan to check in from time to time. I absolutely respect your openness and I think you gave some great advice. :-) No need at all to thank me, Blue. If anything I have offered makes any sense at all, then that truly makes me smile. I base the next sentences on your sentiments so far. It sounds as if you are not into any kind of games. You seek someone who is genuine. There is a definitely a guy out in this world who is going to give you the full attention which is definitely deserved. This is the man who may then deserve your own. Never compromise what you care about. So happy to hear that you are going to be checking in! There are many magnificent minds around these parts that have valuable advice to give. I have a hunch you might even be one of them!
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