Still Recovering

[SrJ85]

I was with a girl for ten years, lived with her for 9 of them.

 

The relationship went sour and I found a new girl that gave me back a sense of excitement.

 

I gave the house up to the ex and moved in with the new girl, but I didn't feel comfortable there, so eventually we found a stunning house which I absolutely loved and moved in together after a couple of months.

 

Long story short, we had a couple of stupid tiffs about s3x etc, which caused the boat to start rocking.

 

A few more tiffs later we started to drift apart, we went to dinner and it was awful, we barely spoke, I knew it was nearing to the end, I just was not one of her priorities.

 

I found a dodgy email on her phone to a customer which proved that she had no respect for me, so as a response to that I found myself drunk, arguing with her at stupid o'clock in the morning and she moved out the next day whilst I was at work.

 

We never really recovered, she told me 2 months after the break up that she found out she was pregnant and lost the baby a month after we broke up, we were certain one of us weren't able to have kids, hence the shock.

 

Eventually, I drove her away and now she won't acknowledge I exist.

 

I know I have to move on, but I have not been single since I was 14 (now 29) and still getting used to it. I see my family a lot, as I lost most of my school friends during the 10 year relationship as we had to moved around a lot with work.

 

I work shifts, so it is very difficult for me to meet up with people. I also moved away from my home town so I didn't bump into her.

 

I now have my own place, a great car, plenty of cash and gearing up to start my own company.

 

I know we broke up because we really weren't compatible, the honeymoon period and the excitement of a new relationship really blinded us.

 

But I still slip back and hound her with emails and texts to try and get her to respond every now and then.

 

I really am stuck in an awkward rut, which I can't seem to get out of.

[RuralMama]

Sorry you are struggling. I try to encourage my sons that a good relationship is built on a solid friendship. I hope that you can find someone and build that friendship. You are young, use this time to become the man that a woman deserves. Develop your character, your relationship skills. The right woman will come along. Hugs!