johno069 Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Because of what has happened to my now sort of ex in the past before we met, she has really hardened her heart. It doesn't matter what effort that I put into trying to make things better and easier for her it just doesn't seem to work. The last argument we had went a bit far in that their was a lot said in the heat of it and now she is hanging onto to it all, and says that she doesn't want to be with me and moved into the spare room. I must add though that I have never struck her either I have no idea what so ever how to help mend her hurt, as she says words are just that and have no meaning and when I try to ask her for input on how she feels and or felt, so I can understand my actions better she cuts me down. Hopefully someone can give me an insight as to understand how I can help unharden her heart. I also suffer from bipola and take meds. And have starting seeing professionals for help. Thank you
todreaminblue Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 the strongest of hearts are the ones that have been broken time and time again they develop a defense mechanism that is impenetrable....survivalistic and fierce for they are always ready to be broken again...thats the point....a protected heart is protected because that heart knows it would take the risk of being broken...... the only way to get through protection a soldiers heart in otherwords..... is to ask the right questions and to give true answers to questions asked in return.... so truth honesty respect genuine desire.......the only way......is this way...there is s no hidden agenda afforded to you, no selfishness that would allow you entry.......only truth and genuine desire......start there and watch the walls come down.....brick by brick..and when you get there dont take it for granted again......apologize when you do something wrong(we all do) and keep honesty and respect as your friends with a hearts intentions...if you leave those bricks in place the longer you leave them, the harder it will be for you to break through....because then it is a heart set in stone and resolved.....not a protected heart in other words but a changed one.....dont let it get that strong.......its up to you ....deb 2
Author johno069 Posted June 21, 2014 Author Posted June 21, 2014 I have tried to talk with her about certain things and tried to help her out. Every time I do this she tries to tell me that I'm just sucking up to her. She won't even take the time to understand me and the fact that I have bipolar and I am taking meds and doing my best to get appointments for psychs, and that I have to try and level out. So at the moment I really don't know what to do
todreaminblue Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I have tried to talk with her about certain things and tried to help her out. Every time I do this she tries to tell me that I'm just sucking up to her. She won't even take the time to understand me and the fact that I have bipolar and I am taking meds and doing my best to get appointments for psychs, and that I have to try and level out. So at the moment I really don't know what to do tell me what have you said or done, that she has hardened her heart
Author johno069 Posted June 21, 2014 Author Posted June 21, 2014 Her heart was already hardened before we met as result of a few violent relationships. We were arguing and I said that I helped get you to where you are today. And that all I ever ask for is a bit of your time to talk, as we never do and I'm sick of it. And because of what has happened to her before she is very difficult and I get frustrated by it. She says that I'm being to demanding of her time.
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